korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
My world. My heartburn. My lanta.
korpisworld.com
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korpisworld.com
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
· Oct 19
I like to wear my cowboy hat to the grocery store then stand in front of the canned beans shelf asking passersby which kind they think the other fellas on the cattle drive would like. “You think Bourbon and Brown Sugar?” I ask.
November is for being grateful. December is for realizing how expensive that gratitude is.
November 22, 2025 at 7:48 PM
November is for being grateful. December is for realizing how expensive that gratitude is.
Reposted by korpisworld
It's that time of year
November 22, 2025 at 11:54 AM
It's that time of year
Reposted by korpisworld
some of y'all have never cried while listening to whoomp there it is and it shows
November 21, 2025 at 9:55 PM
some of y'all have never cried while listening to whoomp there it is and it shows
Reposted by korpisworld
Someone compliments you on your porcelain skin. How does it feel to be compared to a toilet?
November 22, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Someone compliments you on your porcelain skin. How does it feel to be compared to a toilet?
Reposted by korpisworld
The insanity of all this is increasing at an exponential rate, something has to break bubba
November 15, 2025 at 3:25 AM
The insanity of all this is increasing at an exponential rate, something has to break bubba
Reposted by korpisworld
"Lunchables" is a good name because it doesn't make any grandiose claims: "This is able to be eaten as lunch."
November 22, 2025 at 5:02 PM
"Lunchables" is a good name because it doesn't make any grandiose claims: "This is able to be eaten as lunch."
Reposted by korpisworld
Antifreeze is just Gatorade for cars.
November 22, 2025 at 5:47 PM
Antifreeze is just Gatorade for cars.
Reposted by korpisworld
Some of you think you still have time; I thought the same when I was your age.
November 22, 2025 at 12:50 PM
Some of you think you still have time; I thought the same when I was your age.
Reposted by korpisworld
If you bring your fancy peanut butter to the Home Depot paint dept they have to mix it for you
November 22, 2025 at 2:55 PM
If you bring your fancy peanut butter to the Home Depot paint dept they have to mix it for you
Reposted by korpisworld
I'm planning to take advantage of the post-Thanksgiving sales to stock up for my new cranberry sauce wrestling franchise
November 22, 2025 at 2:49 AM
I'm planning to take advantage of the post-Thanksgiving sales to stock up for my new cranberry sauce wrestling franchise
Reposted by korpisworld
I have the same view of math as I do with Italian operas.
It’s beautiful, but I don’t know what the fuck you’re saying
It’s beautiful, but I don’t know what the fuck you’re saying
November 10, 2025 at 12:37 AM
I have the same view of math as I do with Italian operas.
It’s beautiful, but I don’t know what the fuck you’re saying
It’s beautiful, but I don’t know what the fuck you’re saying
Reposted by korpisworld
It is against the law to own a raptor with bird flu, or in other words it is illegal to possess an ill eagle.
November 21, 2025 at 2:15 AM
It is against the law to own a raptor with bird flu, or in other words it is illegal to possess an ill eagle.
Reposted by korpisworld
*shouting to a friend at a club* THIS HOUSE MUSIC MAKES ME WANT TO GO HOME
November 22, 2025 at 11:16 AM
*shouting to a friend at a club* THIS HOUSE MUSIC MAKES ME WANT TO GO HOME
Reposted by korpisworld
Everything I say must be taken with a pound of salt.
November 20, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Everything I say must be taken with a pound of salt.
I just invented a meal between breakfast and brunch called brebru
November 22, 2025 at 4:18 PM
I just invented a meal between breakfast and brunch called brebru
Reposted by korpisworld
Doctor: you’re going to feel some pressure, ready?
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
November 21, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Doctor: you’re going to feel some pressure, ready?
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
Reposted by korpisworld
I was like ‘so what’s your favourite Alanis Morrisette song’ and she was like ‘You Oughta Know’ and I was all ‘I’m not a fucken mind reader, Sharon’.
November 21, 2025 at 9:03 PM
I was like ‘so what’s your favourite Alanis Morrisette song’ and she was like ‘You Oughta Know’ and I was all ‘I’m not a fucken mind reader, Sharon’.
Reposted by korpisworld
I'm not saying I'm petty but if your beard is better than mine I’m not gonna follow you. The same goes for boobies.
November 22, 2025 at 3:00 PM
I'm not saying I'm petty but if your beard is better than mine I’m not gonna follow you. The same goes for boobies.
Reposted by korpisworld
no one should interact with my posts without a parental permission slip
November 22, 2025 at 1:42 AM
no one should interact with my posts without a parental permission slip
Reposted by korpisworld
Good news insomniacs…
ONLY THREE SLEEPS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!!
ONLY THREE SLEEPS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!!
November 22, 2025 at 9:51 AM
Good news insomniacs…
ONLY THREE SLEEPS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!!
ONLY THREE SLEEPS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!!
Reposted by korpisworld
why yes I have long been an aficionado of the humpty dance
November 22, 2025 at 1:44 AM
why yes I have long been an aficionado of the humpty dance
Reposted by korpisworld
babe, listen, I need you to bring me $15,000 cash and my passport. I out-pizza’d the hut and they are after me
November 22, 2025 at 1:26 AM
babe, listen, I need you to bring me $15,000 cash and my passport. I out-pizza’d the hut and they are after me
Camped out at the bakery last night to get fresh bread this morning. Cop came along and told me to loaf somewhere else.
November 22, 2025 at 2:50 PM
Camped out at the bakery last night to get fresh bread this morning. Cop came along and told me to loaf somewhere else.
Reposted by korpisworld
anybody know the cutoff when kmart puts your layaway back
November 22, 2025 at 6:32 AM
anybody know the cutoff when kmart puts your layaway back
Reposted by korpisworld
My doctor said I should avoid too much excitement so I won’t be using exclamation points for a while.
November 22, 2025 at 11:29 AM
My doctor said I should avoid too much excitement so I won’t be using exclamation points for a while.