DaddyJew
@daddyjew.bsky.social
11K followers 650 following 4K posts
Bangers https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:nhz43btfuzkkgj2hwvhvc2jr/feed/aaal2ybjpxkkq Mash https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:nhz43btfuzkkgj2hwvhvc2jr/feed/aaal2qxgwlhfc Fresh Tots https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:nhz43btfuzkkgj2hwvhvc2jr/feed/aaajknw6kxutk
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daddyjew.bsky.social
Coworker: is this AI? *shows me a video of MLK issuing the Stone Cold Stunner to The Undertaker before flicking him off*

Me: no, that happened
Reposted by DaddyJew
tikimoon.bsky.social
It’s just a misdemeanor, Charlie Brown.
daddyjew.bsky.social
Put the Gun Down Charlie Brown
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daddyjew.bsky.social
she was the Cheech to my Chong
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daddyjew.bsky.social
It’s ok, that’s just my artisanal breakfast blunt officer
daddyjew.bsky.social
all of my friends are strangers on the internet
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batkaren.bsky.social
no more current events, please
daddyjew.bsky.social
*watching son play Minecraft*

Me: why does that grave say Daddy?

Son: that's a different Daddy, you don't know him
daddyjew.bsky.social
the first hour of the day and the last hour of the day i am at my dumbest
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outonthemoors.bsky.social
They should've known shitposters are social butterflies.
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elgatoesmio.bsky.social
Hey guys please stop calling my girlfriend a “hallucination”
daddyjew.bsky.social
just when i think Bluesky place is dead, y’all come back to life
daddyjew.bsky.social
Alexa, did they ever find out what was eating that Gilbert Grape fella
daddyjew.bsky.social
*crawls into bed late at night and whispers those 8 special words "you’re on my side of the fucking bed"
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ennuidoofen.bsky.social
One great thing about having a chest wound is you can walk around with a real "what are ya gonna do to me, stab me in the chest?" attitude. I'm just here to remind you that one can have two chest wounds, so you may wanna say,"What are you gonna do to me, stab me in the chest TWICE?"
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benedictsred.bsky.social
Rob! Rob, it’s Marvin! Your cousin, Marvin Zombie!
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gregthemiller.bsky.social
the worst part of people moving to mastodon is that now i have to post to both platforms and do math to know if it was a banger
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daddyjew.bsky.social
6: can i have ice cream?

Me: is your room clean?

6: if I clean it can I have ice cream?

Me: sure

6: *looks at room* thats ok, I dont need ice cream
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gypsican.bsky.social
Feeling like moving into an abandoned, haunted, remote house and being possessed by its demons
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jamnpp.bsky.social
Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world,... I feel like I can't take it. And my heart is just going to cave in.
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daddyjew.bsky.social
when life hands you a person to love, check with your local government to make sure that kind of stuff is acceptable
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daddyjew.bsky.social
if you had a choice between owning a dragon or world peace, what would you name your dragon?
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porcelainsiren.bsky.social
whiskey, weed, wish you were here
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thinlyveiledpanda.bsky.social
Started saying mucho to my Spanish friends. It means a lot to them