DaddyJew
@daddyjew.bsky.social
Pinned
The Diary of a Wimpy Bitch Ass President
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Trump, five days apart. A pathological liar.
December 9, 2025 at 2:06 PM
Trump, five days apart. A pathological liar.
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im honored to accept this Wawa Peace Prize
December 6, 2025 at 3:30 PM
im honored to accept this Wawa Peace Prize
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Please note from this day hence any scented candles, pre-packaged candy, or discontinued colognes are assumed to be re-gifts and treated as an act of hostility
December 9, 2025 at 2:28 PM
Please note from this day hence any scented candles, pre-packaged candy, or discontinued colognes are assumed to be re-gifts and treated as an act of hostility
Reposted by DaddyJew
I know the spirals coming, I’m just trying to take away some of its velocity.
December 9, 2025 at 3:11 PM
I know the spirals coming, I’m just trying to take away some of its velocity.
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String theory, but it’s just me talking about mozzarella
String theory, but it’s just me talking about how tampons are made
December 9, 2025 at 9:40 PM
String theory, but it’s just me talking about mozzarella
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I'll put da lime in da coconut. AND drink it all up. IDGAF
December 9, 2025 at 10:16 PM
I'll put da lime in da coconut. AND drink it all up. IDGAF
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What if I don't want a case of the Mondays? A six-pack is more than enough
December 8, 2025 at 4:14 PM
What if I don't want a case of the Mondays? A six-pack is more than enough
I’ll never forgive some people for ruining certain songs for me forever
December 9, 2025 at 10:18 PM
I’ll never forgive some people for ruining certain songs for me forever
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i really am a motherfucking starboy i whisper as i exit the self serve checkout without incident
October 11, 2025 at 10:33 PM
i really am a motherfucking starboy i whisper as i exit the self serve checkout without incident
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Just once I’d like an athlete to say “hail Satan” at the beginning of a post game interview, is that too much to ask
December 9, 2025 at 7:05 PM
Just once I’d like an athlete to say “hail Satan” at the beginning of a post game interview, is that too much to ask
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I tend to only retain knowledge for as long as I need said knowledge so don’t ask me about the Pythagorean theorem or what I ate for breakfast yesterday morning
December 9, 2025 at 1:12 PM
I tend to only retain knowledge for as long as I need said knowledge so don’t ask me about the Pythagorean theorem or what I ate for breakfast yesterday morning
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sorry I made a hot dog into a straw at your family dinner
December 9, 2025 at 12:43 PM
sorry I made a hot dog into a straw at your family dinner
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I’d make you breakfast in bed and I wouldn’t even poison it
December 7, 2025 at 2:50 PM
I’d make you breakfast in bed and I wouldn’t even poison it
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I was led to believe there would be more dream sequences.
December 9, 2025 at 7:54 PM
I was led to believe there would be more dream sequences.
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Books are power charges for your brain.
December 8, 2025 at 9:39 PM
Books are power charges for your brain.
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We've never been here before - you're imagining it
December 4, 2025 at 5:06 AM
We've never been here before - you're imagining it
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String theory, but it’s just me talking about how tampons are made
December 9, 2025 at 7:56 PM
String theory, but it’s just me talking about how tampons are made
Reposted by DaddyJew
But your honor, he said that I look amazing for my age?
November 4, 2025 at 10:09 AM
But your honor, he said that I look amazing for my age?
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Anxiety be like hey gurl you want a spicy tummyache
December 9, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Anxiety be like hey gurl you want a spicy tummyache
sorry i made your girl fall in love with me by loading the dishwasher properly
December 9, 2025 at 8:06 PM
sorry i made your girl fall in love with me by loading the dishwasher properly
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stage fright is for beginners be terrified everywhere all the time
December 9, 2025 at 7:34 PM
stage fright is for beginners be terrified everywhere all the time
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gonna see if i can go the whole day without making a post
December 9, 2025 at 7:59 PM
gonna see if i can go the whole day without making a post
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One of my greatest joys in the world is watching people on the sledding hill take each other out like bowling pins
December 6, 2025 at 8:49 PM
One of my greatest joys in the world is watching people on the sledding hill take each other out like bowling pins
Reposted by DaddyJew
Studies show 2 blunts a day reduces the chance of giving a fuck
December 9, 2025 at 6:54 PM
Studies show 2 blunts a day reduces the chance of giving a fuck