mean things I say to myself
@meantomyself.bsky.social
3rd wife material. Jokes in the skeets, politics in the streets. Serving mufflepuff in NC. Up good. $4 to Goog it for you. Make EM cry 2025
Skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaaoms63lvrkk
Skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaaoms63lvrkk
Pinned
On a scale of 1 to 10 for hotness, I would rate myself a good listener
Is it normal to feel so weak it's hard to stir a stiff batter
November 27, 2025 at 1:20 PM
Is it normal to feel so weak it's hard to stir a stiff batter
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
I’ve never paid for sex.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
November 26, 2025 at 9:15 PM
I’ve never paid for sex.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
speed dating but it’s just a scholastic book fair for adults
November 26, 2025 at 9:49 PM
speed dating but it’s just a scholastic book fair for adults
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
the heart wants what it wants. Ok. but what if it wants crack
November 26, 2025 at 3:37 PM
the heart wants what it wants. Ok. but what if it wants crack
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Pediatricians say vaccines do not cause autism. A bear-eating heroin addict who fantasizes about sucking his own semen out of his lovers' orifices says they do. For busy parents, it can be hard to know who to trust.
November 26, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Pediatricians say vaccines do not cause autism. A bear-eating heroin addict who fantasizes about sucking his own semen out of his lovers' orifices says they do. For busy parents, it can be hard to know who to trust.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
if your family is gonna celebrate thanksgiving, at least do it the proper way and have hot dogs like jesus did.
November 26, 2025 at 12:43 AM
if your family is gonna celebrate thanksgiving, at least do it the proper way and have hot dogs like jesus did.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
I’ve don’t use Google. I text my friend Randall who used to be a dental assistant
November 26, 2025 at 1:30 AM
I’ve don’t use Google. I text my friend Randall who used to be a dental assistant
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
A spittoon and a singing bowl walk into a dark den of deep meditation. Zen says is none of you lost. Singing bowl spits out a mallet and spittoon says see I told you, if you got me hammered they would not be able to tell us apart, that was my cowboy
November 26, 2025 at 5:39 AM
A spittoon and a singing bowl walk into a dark den of deep meditation. Zen says is none of you lost. Singing bowl spits out a mallet and spittoon says see I told you, if you got me hammered they would not be able to tell us apart, that was my cowboy
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
A dating app that only shows their latest Spotify playlist and bank account balance.
November 26, 2025 at 11:30 AM
A dating app that only shows their latest Spotify playlist and bank account balance.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
The CIA made me memorize the alphabet with my mind. MKLmnop. But seriously why is there a literal street of sesame on the 1 2 3 dollar bill
November 26, 2025 at 4:53 PM
The CIA made me memorize the alphabet with my mind. MKLmnop. But seriously why is there a literal street of sesame on the 1 2 3 dollar bill
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Our surroundings have always listened in on us, their capitalism is the environment of a perfect moment. "Your surroundings have their hands up, you are too paranoid for the presence of psychic shopping"
November 25, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Our surroundings have always listened in on us, their capitalism is the environment of a perfect moment. "Your surroundings have their hands up, you are too paranoid for the presence of psychic shopping"
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
one of the coolest things about ChatGPT is how you can actually just never use it. you can fill your whole entire life with simply not once using it. it's incredible.
November 25, 2025 at 4:15 PM
one of the coolest things about ChatGPT is how you can actually just never use it. you can fill your whole entire life with simply not once using it. it's incredible.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Pete Hegseth keeps demanding to be taken seriously and then spends all his time talking down to accomplished military leaders, rebranding his department and renaming ships, engaging in culture wars bullshit, shitting all over the military's sense of ethics and generally making an ass of himself.
November 25, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Pete Hegseth keeps demanding to be taken seriously and then spends all his time talking down to accomplished military leaders, rebranding his department and renaming ships, engaging in culture wars bullshit, shitting all over the military's sense of ethics and generally making an ass of himself.
If I was an elected official, I would simply not do crime
November 26, 2025 at 1:15 AM
If I was an elected official, I would simply not do crime
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
They should invent an email that doesn't find me at all
November 25, 2025 at 5:45 PM
They should invent an email that doesn't find me at all
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Women being attracted to RFK Jr is how you know heterosexuality is NOT a choice.
November 25, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Women being attracted to RFK Jr is how you know heterosexuality is NOT a choice.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Disco Elysium is like Radiohead was to me twenty years ago, it’s probably great but the fans are so annoying they’ve turned me off ever doing a deep dive
November 25, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Disco Elysium is like Radiohead was to me twenty years ago, it’s probably great but the fans are so annoying they’ve turned me off ever doing a deep dive
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
who the fuck would want a work husband? like i need another asshole in my life asking me where we keep the scissors
November 25, 2025 at 7:54 PM
who the fuck would want a work husband? like i need another asshole in my life asking me where we keep the scissors
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
I really wish we'd stop calling them climate "skeptics" or "vaccine skeptics", if you jump off a cliff we don't call you a "gravity skeptic"
November 25, 2025 at 8:18 PM
I really wish we'd stop calling them climate "skeptics" or "vaccine skeptics", if you jump off a cliff we don't call you a "gravity skeptic"
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
A lot of people don't know this, but in Cincinnati they stuff the Thanksgiving turkey with chili
November 25, 2025 at 8:59 PM
A lot of people don't know this, but in Cincinnati they stuff the Thanksgiving turkey with chili
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
The greatest lie the devil ever told is that shower sex is great
November 25, 2025 at 9:13 PM
The greatest lie the devil ever told is that shower sex is great
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
I will take this dumb take as a flimsy springboard to show the absolutely exquisite apple pie that my friend made of me and my husband for our wedding
November 25, 2025 at 9:22 PM
I will take this dumb take as a flimsy springboard to show the absolutely exquisite apple pie that my friend made of me and my husband for our wedding
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
did i get anything done today? no. but did i relax? also no.
November 25, 2025 at 10:03 PM
did i get anything done today? no. but did i relax? also no.
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
after all, why not? why shouldn't I gift myself a sparkly engagement ring?
November 25, 2025 at 11:03 PM
after all, why not? why shouldn't I gift myself a sparkly engagement ring?