mean things I say to myself
@meantomyself.bsky.social
3rd wife material. Jokes in the skeets, politics in the streets. Serving mufflepuff in NC. Up good. $4 to Goog it for you. Make EM cry 2025
Skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaaoms63lvrkk
Skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaaoms63lvrkk
Pinned
On a scale of 1 to 10 for hotness, I would rate myself a good listener
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Eating ocean spray jellied cranberry sauce directly from the can for breakfast
November 28, 2025 at 12:24 PM
Eating ocean spray jellied cranberry sauce directly from the can for breakfast
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Time to start leaving out milk and cookies for the porch thieves.
November 28, 2025 at 6:09 AM
Time to start leaving out milk and cookies for the porch thieves.
Yes, is this the police? Great. I would like to report a crime. My mother didn't make enough stuffing to put on my leftover sandwiches. I am sure you can charge my dad as an accessory, he had three servings, I counted
November 28, 2025 at 1:32 PM
Yes, is this the police? Great. I would like to report a crime. My mother didn't make enough stuffing to put on my leftover sandwiches. I am sure you can charge my dad as an accessory, he had three servings, I counted
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Talked about my work in audiobooks with a family member and just found out that he asked my sister if she knows who “Charles Tingle” is
November 28, 2025 at 1:05 AM
Talked about my work in audiobooks with a family member and just found out that he asked my sister if she knows who “Charles Tingle” is
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yeah i'm a cam girl (the cam is short for "camembert")
November 28, 2025 at 4:13 AM
yeah i'm a cam girl (the cam is short for "camembert")
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[recipe] “let rice krispie treats sit for an hour before eating”
me, with a handful of gooey rice krispie treat melting in my grip: “no”
me, with a handful of gooey rice krispie treat melting in my grip: “no”
November 28, 2025 at 7:06 AM
[recipe] “let rice krispie treats sit for an hour before eating”
me, with a handful of gooey rice krispie treat melting in my grip: “no”
me, with a handful of gooey rice krispie treat melting in my grip: “no”
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My AI hand turkey has seven tail feathers.
November 26, 2025 at 9:39 PM
My AI hand turkey has seven tail feathers.
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When you slick your hair back at night to be dark and late nitey but your cowlick is naturally against casual lite spelling
November 27, 2025 at 5:58 AM
When you slick your hair back at night to be dark and late nitey but your cowlick is naturally against casual lite spelling
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Put “spree” after “killing” and the whole thing suddenly sounds so breezy and upbeat.
November 27, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Put “spree” after “killing” and the whole thing suddenly sounds so breezy and upbeat.
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got a feeling that today's the day I get answers
a woman posted a pic in a group chat of a baby turkey she bought thinking it was a chicken. She captioned the pic "IS THIS A TURKEY?!?"
Anyway, I haven't been here because I've been yelling IS THIS A TURKEY at everything. You should try it
Anyway, I haven't been here because I've been yelling IS THIS A TURKEY at everything. You should try it
November 27, 2025 at 4:03 PM
got a feeling that today's the day I get answers
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The important philosophical questions of any holiday are: did Hallmark just always exist, did it originate in outer space, if you believe in it but don't send cards can you still get into envelope
November 27, 2025 at 5:05 PM
The important philosophical questions of any holiday are: did Hallmark just always exist, did it originate in outer space, if you believe in it but don't send cards can you still get into envelope
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You must have come over on the baeflower
November 27, 2025 at 5:53 PM
You must have come over on the baeflower
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ordered a slice of pie and they sent me FOUR WHOLE PIES in case anybody wants to know what i’m eating for the next month
November 27, 2025 at 11:20 PM
ordered a slice of pie and they sent me FOUR WHOLE PIES in case anybody wants to know what i’m eating for the next month
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Sometimes I’ll meet someone and just know they drank milk with dinner when they were a kid
November 28, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Sometimes I’ll meet someone and just know they drank milk with dinner when they were a kid
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I can’t hold my liquor but I’ll bet I could hold yours.
November 28, 2025 at 11:10 AM
I can’t hold my liquor but I’ll bet I could hold yours.
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Everything I'm doing fits in less and less. Take living in a hole hoarding all positive space for example
November 28, 2025 at 6:04 AM
Everything I'm doing fits in less and less. Take living in a hole hoarding all positive space for example
Is it normal to feel so weak it's hard to stir a stiff batter
November 27, 2025 at 1:20 PM
Is it normal to feel so weak it's hard to stir a stiff batter
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I’ve never paid for sex.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
November 26, 2025 at 9:15 PM
I’ve never paid for sex.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
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speed dating but it’s just a scholastic book fair for adults
November 26, 2025 at 9:49 PM
speed dating but it’s just a scholastic book fair for adults
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the heart wants what it wants. Ok. but what if it wants crack
November 26, 2025 at 3:37 PM
the heart wants what it wants. Ok. but what if it wants crack
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Reposted by mean things I say to myself
Pediatricians say vaccines do not cause autism. A bear-eating heroin addict who fantasizes about sucking his own semen out of his lovers' orifices says they do. For busy parents, it can be hard to know who to trust.
November 26, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Pediatricians say vaccines do not cause autism. A bear-eating heroin addict who fantasizes about sucking his own semen out of his lovers' orifices says they do. For busy parents, it can be hard to know who to trust.
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if your family is gonna celebrate thanksgiving, at least do it the proper way and have hot dogs like jesus did.
November 26, 2025 at 12:43 AM
if your family is gonna celebrate thanksgiving, at least do it the proper way and have hot dogs like jesus did.
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I’ve don’t use Google. I text my friend Randall who used to be a dental assistant
November 26, 2025 at 1:30 AM
I’ve don’t use Google. I text my friend Randall who used to be a dental assistant
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A spittoon and a singing bowl walk into a dark den of deep meditation. Zen says is none of you lost. Singing bowl spits out a mallet and spittoon says see I told you, if you got me hammered they would not be able to tell us apart, that was my cowboy
November 26, 2025 at 5:39 AM
A spittoon and a singing bowl walk into a dark den of deep meditation. Zen says is none of you lost. Singing bowl spits out a mallet and spittoon says see I told you, if you got me hammered they would not be able to tell us apart, that was my cowboy