🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
banner
jollyrobber.bsky.social
🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
@jollyrobber.bsky.social
Thoughts from the dark side of a married man. It is what it is and I ain't shit. (Not) New & (Certainly Not) Improved
bsky.app/profile/jollyrobber.bsky.social/search

My Musings
https://tinyurl.com/2p9ruj7u

Best? Of
https://tinyurl.com/mry4284p
Pinned
Hell yes I'm recycling all my tweets on Bluesky. Why should I come up with new garbage when I already have this garbage?
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
I'm still angry "Punky Brewster" had hardly any punk rock music in it.
November 27, 2025 at 8:34 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you've been to:

Green Day
Korn
Taylor Swift Eras Tour
Christina Aguilera
George Strait
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you've been to:

(Chicago 2024-25 edition)

Billy Bragg
Ari Brown
Craig Taborn
Trio 3
Fay Victor
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve been to:

System of a Down
Paramore
Warped Tour 98
Ozzfest 99
Bad Religion
November 27, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
Modern math problem: My dentist will charge $25 if I'm 5 min late. How much does the dentist owe me when I show up on time and wait 40 minutes for my "appointment"?
November 27, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
Never met a Davante who didn’t play in the NFL.
November 27, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
nana said we can be on our phones at the table if we’re all on individual calls with speaker phone on
November 27, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
I’ll gladly take a cruise if I can throw one to 1,000 people overboard with impunity.
November 27, 2025 at 8:10 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
The guy who invented the word ‘gobble’ should be allowed to invent more things
November 27, 2025 at 1:44 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
I like to go to zen gardens and shout at things.
November 27, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
next year i want to be seated at the dogs’ table
November 27, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
"This reminds me of your dad"
-Your mom, with her fist inside the turkey
November 27, 2025 at 3:57 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
Happy Thursday, to those who celebrate.
November 27, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
People that put their shopping cart in the cart corral when they are finished using them should receive a hero's parade every memorial day.
November 27, 2025 at 8:07 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
I bet people who don’t repost drive slow in the passing lane and block grocery aisles
November 24, 2025 at 1:36 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
Guillermo del Toro's Herbie Goes Bananas
Guillermo del Toro’s The Care Bears Movie
Guillermo del Toro's There's Something About Mary
November 26, 2025 at 6:04 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
Local YMCA does a turkey 5k run/walk that passes my house on Thanksgiving and I’m currently watching them run while I eat a pancake and sausage on a stick
November 27, 2025 at 2:37 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
It’s Thursday but in terms of butthole it feels like Friday
November 20, 2025 at 7:56 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
*jerk off motion*… The title of my memoir.
WEEEE! The title of my memior.
Welp..The title of my memior.
November 21, 2025 at 6:46 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
another fine mess you’ve gotten us into, Stan
November 21, 2025 at 9:48 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
you’re just a skeleton holding up a bunch of flesh that was designed to be a vessel to carry poop around
November 21, 2025 at 11:38 PM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
* should be the like button
it should always be butthole
normalize replacing social media acknowledgment buttons which express that I saw your stuff with stars or deadass anything. Hearts suck. It’s where twitter went wrong and it’s how this place started out on the wrong foot
November 25, 2025 at 4:03 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
*exhales massive vape cloud*
We used to pay money to have someone else give a mutual a trophy emoji for a good tweet.
November 25, 2025 at 4:07 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
my last recreational beverage will be a martini, a real martini (made with gin) with an eyeball instead of olive
I feel I owe it to Lux Interior and Poison Ivy
November 25, 2025 at 4:12 AM
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
the downside of 140 characters was more acronyms and who doesn’t hate acronyms htgihts
November 25, 2025 at 4:13 AM