Cigarette
@smokecigarettes.bsky.social
CIgarettes are good for you! YUM!
Pinned
Cigarette
@smokecigarettes.bsky.social
· Apr 22
This is my best post. That's why it's pinned.
Logging in to chat with my own personal Jesus!
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who's there
Only $9.99 per month through Heaven Streaming+
An all new religion streaming service brought to you by God Inc.
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who's there
Only $9.99 per month through Heaven Streaming+
An all new religion streaming service brought to you by God Inc.
December 3, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Logging in to chat with my own personal Jesus!
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who's there
Only $9.99 per month through Heaven Streaming+
An all new religion streaming service brought to you by God Inc.
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who's there
Only $9.99 per month through Heaven Streaming+
An all new religion streaming service brought to you by God Inc.
Pete Hegseth slicks his hair back every morning with the grease drippings from the deep fried rat meat he eats for breakfast.
December 3, 2025 at 2:32 PM
Pete Hegseth slicks his hair back every morning with the grease drippings from the deep fried rat meat he eats for breakfast.
The neighbor is upset with me because I built a nest and laid eggs in his tool shed.
December 3, 2025 at 2:25 PM
The neighbor is upset with me because I built a nest and laid eggs in his tool shed.
Starting a hard hitting, in depth, political podcast where each episode is just an audio clip of me farting into a microphone
December 3, 2025 at 2:15 PM
Starting a hard hitting, in depth, political podcast where each episode is just an audio clip of me farting into a microphone
Reposted by Cigarette
Helpraiser
Remarkable assist by @focusisfragile.bsky.social
Remarkable assist by @focusisfragile.bsky.social
December 3, 2025 at 1:45 PM
Helpraiser
Remarkable assist by @focusisfragile.bsky.social
Remarkable assist by @focusisfragile.bsky.social
We've spent so much time looking for the clit that we've completely neglected to look for the clit within ourselves.
December 3, 2025 at 5:53 AM
We've spent so much time looking for the clit that we've completely neglected to look for the clit within ourselves.
I need one of these for any flying reindeer that happen to invade my airspace. 🦌🔫
December 2, 2025 at 11:49 PM
I need one of these for any flying reindeer that happen to invade my airspace. 🦌🔫
Sure, things are looking pretty bleak out there.. But, at least I'm a loser with not much else to lose.
Always keep on the sunny side of life, IMO. 😀
Always keep on the sunny side of life, IMO. 😀
December 2, 2025 at 11:41 PM
Sure, things are looking pretty bleak out there.. But, at least I'm a loser with not much else to lose.
Always keep on the sunny side of life, IMO. 😀
Always keep on the sunny side of life, IMO. 😀
Looking great today, sir! Whatever embalming fluid you're using.. it's doing wonders! Very life-like!
December 2, 2025 at 9:01 PM
Looking great today, sir! Whatever embalming fluid you're using.. it's doing wonders! Very life-like!
I lost half a gram of cocaine once. That probably saved at least 1200 lives.
Noem: You have saved hundreds of millions of lives with the Cocaine you’ve blown up in the Caribbean
December 2, 2025 at 8:46 PM
I lost half a gram of cocaine once. That probably saved at least 1200 lives.
I have gotten really good at staring blankly at a wall, mouth agape, while drooling.
December 2, 2025 at 8:14 PM
I have gotten really good at staring blankly at a wall, mouth agape, while drooling.
President Drowsy Don
~*~The Sleepiest Boy~*~
~*~The Sleepiest Boy~*~
December 2, 2025 at 7:10 PM
President Drowsy Don
~*~The Sleepiest Boy~*~
~*~The Sleepiest Boy~*~
Funniest guy I know wrote a new bit.
It's just going around to groups of people and saying "I am become meme!" over and over.
It's just going around to groups of people and saying "I am become meme!" over and over.
December 2, 2025 at 3:14 PM
Funniest guy I know wrote a new bit.
It's just going around to groups of people and saying "I am become meme!" over and over.
It's just going around to groups of people and saying "I am become meme!" over and over.
As a person that remembers the Collateral Murder video, this is driving me insane. Have I crossed over into some sort of bizarro crazy kookoo alternate timeline?
And suddenly the media is concerned about American war crimes.
December 2, 2025 at 2:20 PM
As a person that remembers the Collateral Murder video, this is driving me insane. Have I crossed over into some sort of bizarro crazy kookoo alternate timeline?
It's a little early for this sort of thing, don't you think?
December 2, 2025 at 12:01 PM
It's a little early for this sort of thing, don't you think?
And suddenly the media is concerned about American war crimes.
December 1, 2025 at 10:15 PM
And suddenly the media is concerned about American war crimes.
Did you know if I go more than 24 hours without posting that I start disappearing from family photos like Marty McFly in Back to the Future?
December 1, 2025 at 4:01 PM
Did you know if I go more than 24 hours without posting that I start disappearing from family photos like Marty McFly in Back to the Future?
Reposted by Cigarette
i can move objects with my hands, if i concentrate really hard
December 1, 2025 at 12:55 AM
i can move objects with my hands, if i concentrate really hard
I think it's important to maintain a high level of professionalism in all of my online interactions.
I am a shit poster, not a savage beast.
I am a shit poster, not a savage beast.
December 1, 2025 at 1:41 AM
I think it's important to maintain a high level of professionalism in all of my online interactions.
I am a shit poster, not a savage beast.
I am a shit poster, not a savage beast.
Reposted by Cigarette
Here’s a meme I made.
December 1, 2025 at 1:35 AM
Here’s a meme I made.
Starting a fist fight with your 3rd grade teacher just to feel something.
December 1, 2025 at 12:59 AM
Starting a fist fight with your 3rd grade teacher just to feel something.
You can tell the Pope is American by how he commits mass shootings with an AR-15
December 1, 2025 at 12:54 AM
You can tell the Pope is American by how he commits mass shootings with an AR-15
You either die a poster or live long enough to see yourself become a reply guy.
December 1, 2025 at 12:45 AM
You either die a poster or live long enough to see yourself become a reply guy.
Festivus? For the REST of us? IN THIS ECONOMY?!?!
November 30, 2025 at 11:22 PM
Festivus? For the REST of us? IN THIS ECONOMY?!?!
Throwing the baby out with the bath water as a form of birth control.
November 30, 2025 at 3:50 PM
Throwing the baby out with the bath water as a form of birth control.