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Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

@brickmahoney.bsky.social

13K followers 1.2K following 5.8K posts

Hey man it was a joke - no need to involve the authorities Why slow down to gawk at auto wrecks when you can view my posts safely 👇 https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:cwxdaayqwdlfjni7g3ududab/feed/aaadwtmcpy7uc

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Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · Dec 9

The Costco sample lady called spanakopita 'spankopedia' and I'm still disappointed it turned out to be a spinach thing

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Matty @bestestname.bsky.social · 1d

I would like to apologize to both Bushes for saying they were the worst president ever

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Nate's Myth @natesmith.dev · 6h

it's hard to accept that we're doing the best we can and everything still sucks

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 9h

i’m suing jd vance for causing my tubes to tie themselves

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 12h

them: i don’t think you’re ready for this jelly
me: you’re right that’s why i’m pumping up the jam

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jason Goes to Hell @benedictsred.bsky.social · 1d

*blush* I guess I am a hot sleeper

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jason Goes to Hell @benedictsred.bsky.social · 8h

Florida is wild. If you leave a room in your house empty for long enough, a Dollar General opens in there

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Sunshine Jarboly @sunshinejarboly.bsky.social · 1d

checking my pants before putting them in the washer, my wife finds a piece of paper in one of the pockets & when she unfolds it she discovers a hyper-realistic drawing of bigfoot, who appears to have mange, with the words ‘we must find him!’ urgently written across the top.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Sunshine Jarboly @sunshinejarboly.bsky.social · 12h

many years ago i worked with Diane Keaton on a movie called Because I Said So. we were filming one day in venice & when they called lunch we all walked from the house we were filming at to catering. there was a woman walking in front of Ms. Keaton taking pictures.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

NurseBrianRN @nursebrianrn.bsky.social · 17h

gave myself a little treat this morning

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

NurseBrianRN @nursebrianrn.bsky.social · 10h

when you have to go back to work, but you’re still a fuckin’ cat:

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

NurseBrianRN @nursebrianrn.bsky.social · 6h

maybe it’s just the nor ’easter talking, but i’m totally wet.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 2d

[at stoplight]

*gets out of car, knocks on driver's window behind me after following me for 3 turns*

Me: Are you obsessed with me?

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 2d

The subtitles of my sextape would just say "squelching" and then, "I'm sorry," after 30 seconds.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Adam @adamurb.bsky.social · 1d

Me: Are you ready for my cavity search?

Dentist: please stop calling it that

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 3d

Funny how you didn’t seem to mind my “empty promises” when I made them.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 15h

Happier than a goth kid finding out what a flock of crows is called.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 1d

I don't want to hear, see, or read anything about Meghan Markle. Sorry, I don't find her interesting enough to hate.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 1d

I'll always cherish our time together, quietly judging you.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 1d

I just say, "Hot dog." The "diggity" is implied.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 12h

The open mouthed, silent scream of a cornered possum one stumbles upon. Did it curse me?

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 12h

I never liked Star Trek: The Next Generation. It just seemed like they gave a passel of gentle high school counselors a war ship to run.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Mary @anniemumary.bsky.social · 17h

That moment I temporarily stop inhabiting my body so that I can pronounce the word corroboration.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

Mary @anniemumary.bsky.social · 1d

I was on a road trip today and stopped at a gas station. When I stepped into the bathroom stall, the toilet was plugged into the wall. Apparently it had a heating unit as well as a bidet system. I did not explore the amenities.

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

'dro👻 @clowndro.bsky.social · 2d

There is nothing like commuting to the office to remind me that I hate everything and everyone ever

Reposted by Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃

'dro👻 @clowndro.bsky.social · 1d

I was paying for food at the counter with my watch and when it didn't work the first time the counter guy exclaimed "fail!" then when it went through on the second try he shouted "success!"