Danny
mardigroan.bsky.social
Danny
@mardigroan.bsky.social
My writing's been found on food shopping lists & mini golf scores

My Bluesky tweets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:aiszm5s7rajxmnj5t35tm4qh/feed/aaadebecxn2si
Pinned
This time of year when you rage against the machine chances are that machine is a neighbor's noisy leaf blower.
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Is that a turkey leg in your pocket or just happy to see me.
November 27, 2025 at 7:51 PM
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there are two kinds of people in this world, those who wear aprons in the kitchen and those who missed their period because they didn’t
November 27, 2025 at 6:30 PM
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Anyone want to try my Thanksgiving leftovers smoothie tomorrow?
November 27, 2025 at 5:39 PM
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turkey’s in the oven, table’s set

time to load the medicine cabinet with pingpong balls
November 27, 2025 at 6:10 PM
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here is a handy visual guide to tell when your turkey is done
November 27, 2025 at 6:00 PM
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On days like these, don't you just want to drench yourself in butter, roll around in flour, and bake at 350° sometimes?
November 27, 2025 at 5:43 PM
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Cutting the canned cranberry jelly into perfect slices has been my biggest accomplishment so far this year.
November 27, 2025 at 5:09 PM
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A gift-free holiday based on eating as much as you can? Yes, please.
November 27, 2025 at 5:44 PM
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BREAKING: Trump offers Zelenskyy free floor mats and window tinting if he can get him into a peace deal today!
November 27, 2025 at 5:17 PM
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You’ll be visited by three spirits.”

The three spirits:
November 27, 2025 at 5:21 PM
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pie
November 27, 2025 at 2:32 PM
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happy danksgiving 💨
November 27, 2025 at 3:26 PM
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when cooking for your in-laws don’t forget the eye of newt
November 27, 2025 at 4:33 PM
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sad news from the thanksgiving day parade: ICE just detained the dora the explorer float.
November 27, 2025 at 3:11 PM
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Why don’t we call Trump “loyalists” in his
cabinet what they really are; co-conspirators ?
November 27, 2025 at 4:09 PM
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teacher: kenya name one country in africa ?

chad: no
November 27, 2025 at 2:53 PM
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don’t get bogged down in your cranberry sauce choice today haha a terrible pun for thanksgiving you’re welcome
November 27, 2025 at 3:04 PM
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(surreptitiously passing myself off as American today for some free turkey)
November 27, 2025 at 3:27 PM
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turkey dinner calzone
November 27, 2025 at 3:48 PM
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gobble gobble mfers
November 27, 2025 at 3:43 PM
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He is risen
November 27, 2025 at 2:42 PM
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Planes, Trains and Automobiles or GTFO.
November 27, 2025 at 3:52 PM
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Them: Are you going to Scarborough Fair?

Me: Yeah, all that way, because Natures Promise didn’t have any fucking parsley, the cheap wankers.
November 27, 2025 at 3:12 PM
You had one job.
November 27, 2025 at 3:08 PM