Charlie Alzamora
@chalza.bsky.social
Keep it right here for more biting commentary, social disconnection and cognitive decline, served with a hint of levity and oregano.
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Is it even thanksgiving if there’s not cat vomit on one of the dining room chairs only discovered as we all go to sit down?
November 27, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Is it even thanksgiving if there’s not cat vomit on one of the dining room chairs only discovered as we all go to sit down?
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
There should be a William H. Macy’s parade
November 27, 2025 at 3:50 PM
There should be a William H. Macy’s parade
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
I like to go to zen gardens and shout at things.
November 27, 2025 at 8:36 PM
I like to go to zen gardens and shout at things.
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
On other days it's "time to make the donuts" but today is it's "time to make the turkey."
November 27, 2025 at 2:16 PM
On other days it's "time to make the donuts" but today is it's "time to make the turkey."
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
November 27, 2025 at 8:08 PM
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Someone just DMed to ask why I swear so much. I won't expose them, since they seem nice-ish, but I'll answer here:
I swear because:
1. I can.
2. I have a lot to swear about.
3. I can.
4. I can.
5. Butthole
I swear because:
1. I can.
2. I have a lot to swear about.
3. I can.
4. I can.
5. Butthole
November 27, 2025 at 8:38 PM
Someone just DMed to ask why I swear so much. I won't expose them, since they seem nice-ish, but I'll answer here:
I swear because:
1. I can.
2. I have a lot to swear about.
3. I can.
4. I can.
5. Butthole
I swear because:
1. I can.
2. I have a lot to swear about.
3. I can.
4. I can.
5. Butthole
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Anyone want to try my Thanksgiving leftovers smoothie tomorrow?
November 27, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Anyone want to try my Thanksgiving leftovers smoothie tomorrow?
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
This is wrong and wonderful in so many ways! 😂😂😂
a turkey is standing on a wooden floor in front of a stove .
Alt: A living turkey is looking at a partially open oven with a roasted turkey in it.
media.tenor.com
November 27, 2025 at 1:48 AM
This is wrong and wonderful in so many ways! 😂😂😂
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
This halftime show is killin it but I’m mostly happy for all those old people who still have cartilage in their joints
November 27, 2025 at 7:49 PM
This halftime show is killin it but I’m mostly happy for all those old people who still have cartilage in their joints
The young folks returned from their "cousins walk" and have spent the last 20 minutes giggling over my mispronunciation of "charcuterie.”
November 27, 2025 at 7:40 PM
The young folks returned from their "cousins walk" and have spent the last 20 minutes giggling over my mispronunciation of "charcuterie.”
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
unlike SOME people, i don’t subskeet
November 27, 2025 at 6:08 PM
unlike SOME people, i don’t subskeet
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Working on my annual Thanksgiving poem to read at the table today what rhymes with ingrates
November 27, 2025 at 12:54 PM
Working on my annual Thanksgiving poem to read at the table today what rhymes with ingrates
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
thankful for all the people I’ve met on social media that make life a little less horrific
November 27, 2025 at 6:34 PM
thankful for all the people I’ve met on social media that make life a little less horrific
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
turkey’s in the oven, table’s set
time to load the medicine cabinet with pingpong balls
time to load the medicine cabinet with pingpong balls
November 27, 2025 at 6:10 PM
turkey’s in the oven, table’s set
time to load the medicine cabinet with pingpong balls
time to load the medicine cabinet with pingpong balls
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
I feel a fake migraine coming on
November 27, 2025 at 6:18 PM
I feel a fake migraine coming on
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
1940s postcard time. This one has writing on the back. It says:
Dearest,
Got here. Got a room. Got tired and got lonesome. Lots of work here. Long week, long way from home and wish you were here. I am fine. Will be in Sat night if all goes well. Had a nice trip to the country...(1/2)
Dearest,
Got here. Got a room. Got tired and got lonesome. Lots of work here. Long week, long way from home and wish you were here. I am fine. Will be in Sat night if all goes well. Had a nice trip to the country...(1/2)
November 27, 2025 at 5:29 PM
1940s postcard time. This one has writing on the back. It says:
Dearest,
Got here. Got a room. Got tired and got lonesome. Lots of work here. Long week, long way from home and wish you were here. I am fine. Will be in Sat night if all goes well. Had a nice trip to the country...(1/2)
Dearest,
Got here. Got a room. Got tired and got lonesome. Lots of work here. Long week, long way from home and wish you were here. I am fine. Will be in Sat night if all goes well. Had a nice trip to the country...(1/2)
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Ok, who spiked the gravy bowl?
November 27, 2025 at 5:40 PM
Ok, who spiked the gravy bowl?
A lot of people are struggling.
Try to be kind
Try not to be kind of a jerk.
Try to be kind
Try not to be kind of a jerk.
November 27, 2025 at 4:36 PM
A lot of people are struggling.
Try to be kind
Try not to be kind of a jerk.
Try to be kind
Try not to be kind of a jerk.
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Every year I see a singer at the parade and say “who the hell is this” and the see their song has 2 billion views on YouTube.
November 27, 2025 at 4:35 PM
Every year I see a singer at the parade and say “who the hell is this” and the see their song has 2 billion views on YouTube.
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
"Politics is the systematic cultivation of hatred."
- Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord
🦃 🍁 🥧
- Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord
🦃 🍁 🥧
November 27, 2025 at 4:18 PM
"Politics is the systematic cultivation of hatred."
- Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord
🦃 🍁 🥧
- Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord
🦃 🍁 🥧
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Happy Holiday That Everyone Knows is Rooted in Colonization But People Get Weird When You Point That Out Day 🦃
November 27, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Happy Holiday That Everyone Knows is Rooted in Colonization But People Get Weird When You Point That Out Day 🦃
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
Looking back on my life, I may have been more inspired by Buckaroo Banzai than I realized
November 27, 2025 at 3:00 PM
Looking back on my life, I may have been more inspired by Buckaroo Banzai than I realized
Reposted by Charlie Alzamora
don’t get bogged down in your cranberry sauce choice today haha a terrible pun for thanksgiving you’re welcome
November 27, 2025 at 3:04 PM
don’t get bogged down in your cranberry sauce choice today haha a terrible pun for thanksgiving you’re welcome