@metalflux.bsky.social
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if elon had a normal dick he absolutely would have posted it by now
February 11, 2026 at 1:56 AM
if elon had a normal dick he absolutely would have posted it by now
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Sky cousins, I know life is a scary mess right now but if you can, please go get everything in/on your body checked that can be done. Some tests are uncomfortable physically or emotionally but needle pricks heal and bruises fade. Those issues are easier to recover from than cancer or death.
February 11, 2026 at 8:29 PM
Sky cousins, I know life is a scary mess right now but if you can, please go get everything in/on your body checked that can be done. Some tests are uncomfortable physically or emotionally but needle pricks heal and bruises fade. Those issues are easier to recover from than cancer or death.
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Whale evolution makes me uncomfortable
February 9, 2026 at 7:48 PM
Whale evolution makes me uncomfortable
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humans gave up claws in exchange for fine motor control
which they immediately used to invent acrylic nails
which they immediately used to invent acrylic nails
February 4, 2026 at 7:12 PM
humans gave up claws in exchange for fine motor control
which they immediately used to invent acrylic nails
which they immediately used to invent acrylic nails
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A thing about me is I would rather die than pay to promote a post on linkedin
February 2, 2026 at 12:55 PM
A thing about me is I would rather die than pay to promote a post on linkedin
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pls leave more crumbs in the cream cheese tub it’s not like my sanity is hanging on by a thread
February 2, 2026 at 12:33 PM
pls leave more crumbs in the cream cheese tub it’s not like my sanity is hanging on by a thread
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late night conversations is how you catch feelings for people you’re supposed to just be friends with
February 2, 2026 at 7:20 PM
late night conversations is how you catch feelings for people you’re supposed to just be friends with
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I like to make house guests uncomfortable by not clearing the unused time on my microwave
November 16, 2024 at 10:01 PM
I like to make house guests uncomfortable by not clearing the unused time on my microwave
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is cry january over yet?
February 1, 2026 at 7:56 PM
is cry january over yet?
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your honor, his nose whistled
January 28, 2026 at 2:13 PM
your honor, his nose whistled
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A large part of my life has been spent looking for a surface to put things on
October 2, 2023 at 11:12 PM
A large part of my life has been spent looking for a surface to put things on
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woke up on the wrong side of the universe
January 26, 2026 at 11:06 AM
woke up on the wrong side of the universe
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you file your taxes , i file my nails. we are exactly the same , except for the adulting part
January 26, 2026 at 2:02 PM
you file your taxes , i file my nails. we are exactly the same , except for the adulting part
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[making pizza rolls]
instructions: heat them up
me: yes
instructions: let them cool
me: no
instructions: heat them up
me: yes
instructions: let them cool
me: no
January 21, 2025 at 2:28 PM
[making pizza rolls]
instructions: heat them up
me: yes
instructions: let them cool
me: no
instructions: heat them up
me: yes
instructions: let them cool
me: no
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normalize and celebrate saying “I may not know enough about this topic to be able to comment, so I won’t.”
January 25, 2026 at 2:36 AM
normalize and celebrate saying “I may not know enough about this topic to be able to comment, so I won’t.”
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My personal style is “It’s Always Laundry Day Somewhere.”
January 24, 2026 at 9:12 PM
My personal style is “It’s Always Laundry Day Somewhere.”
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Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me. Unless you tell me to go to bed. (I’m already in bed)
January 24, 2026 at 2:14 AM
Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me. Unless you tell me to go to bed. (I’m already in bed)
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Ask not what your country can do for you.
Ask what your country can do to you.
Ask what your country can do to you.
January 19, 2026 at 1:56 AM
Ask not what your country can do for you.
Ask what your country can do to you.
Ask what your country can do to you.
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in an alternate universe the dog is hiding 𝙢𝙮 pills in cheese
January 19, 2026 at 1:25 PM
in an alternate universe the dog is hiding 𝙢𝙮 pills in cheese
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I was very disappointed to find out fantasy football had nothing to do with elves or dwarves
January 18, 2026 at 9:59 PM
I was very disappointed to find out fantasy football had nothing to do with elves or dwarves
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innocent men.
innocent men.
we're just innocent men.
innocent men.
we're just innocent men.
July 7, 2025 at 11:33 PM
innocent men.
innocent men.
we're just innocent men.
innocent men.
we're just innocent men.
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just a girl playing with her Dalí
January 19, 2026 at 8:15 PM
just a girl playing with her Dalí
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I used to mix metaphors but that ship has flown.
February 13, 2025 at 6:01 PM
I used to mix metaphors but that ship has flown.
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You asked me to fix it, so I tried, and now it’s broken beyond repair. I hope you learned a lesson here.
January 17, 2026 at 4:19 PM
You asked me to fix it, so I tried, and now it’s broken beyond repair. I hope you learned a lesson here.