mr coffee
@i.n33d.coffee
he who drinketh the last drop, maketh the next pot
greatest hits: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:rlzyizcmx4pk3bnxe5ozg7mf/feed/aaadtsoleyuja
discography: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:rlzyizcmx4pk3bnxe5ozg7mf/feed/aaapcp3poqzim
greatest hits: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:rlzyizcmx4pk3bnxe5ozg7mf/feed/aaadtsoleyuja
discography: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:rlzyizcmx4pk3bnxe5ozg7mf/feed/aaapcp3poqzim
Pinned
mr coffee
@i.n33d.coffee
· Jun 27
But seriously, what’s with those people that make coffee, like, their WHOLE personality?!
*the illusion that the shiny part of the loading bar is increasing the progress part each time it hits the right edge.*
November 14, 2025 at 2:38 AM
*the illusion that the shiny part of the loading bar is increasing the progress part each time it hits the right edge.*
I figured it out! …it’s bubbles! The Grape Rush™ Celsius drink tastes just like the soapy water solution they sell with children’s bubble toys.
November 8, 2025 at 3:59 PM
I figured it out! …it’s bubbles! The Grape Rush™ Celsius drink tastes just like the soapy water solution they sell with children’s bubble toys.
Pronouncing “pilot lights” like Pilates.
October 29, 2025 at 12:37 PM
Pronouncing “pilot lights” like Pilates.
The haptic feedback when doing this in an instagram chat is kind of unsettling.
October 24, 2025 at 12:30 AM
The haptic feedback when doing this in an instagram chat is kind of unsettling.
ACAB includes circle pizzas with 5 servings.
*grabs protractor and pizza cutter*
*grabs protractor and pizza cutter*
October 23, 2025 at 11:12 PM
ACAB includes circle pizzas with 5 servings.
*grabs protractor and pizza cutter*
*grabs protractor and pizza cutter*
Reposted by mr coffee
Until you walk a mile in my clown shoes, you'll never know what it takes to keep this circus running.
October 23, 2025 at 10:32 AM
Until you walk a mile in my clown shoes, you'll never know what it takes to keep this circus running.
Reposted by mr coffee
can't believe they made Lip into Springsteen
October 22, 2025 at 11:23 PM
can't believe they made Lip into Springsteen
Reposted by mr coffee
I did a full after dinner kitchen clean only to hear my family making cookies at 8 pm. How are you doing?
October 22, 2025 at 2:17 AM
I did a full after dinner kitchen clean only to hear my family making cookies at 8 pm. How are you doing?
Reposted by mr coffee
How to stay safe during an encounter with police:
1. Wear glasses
2. Say "you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses"
1. Wear glasses
2. Say "you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses"
October 22, 2025 at 2:31 AM
How to stay safe during an encounter with police:
1. Wear glasses
2. Say "you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses"
1. Wear glasses
2. Say "you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses"
Reposted by mr coffee
this east coast internet bullshit is affecting my west coast weed order man
October 20, 2025 at 6:24 PM
this east coast internet bullshit is affecting my west coast weed order man
Reposted by mr coffee
curious if this work zoom team building game is supposed to make me depressed
October 20, 2025 at 1:33 PM
curious if this work zoom team building game is supposed to make me depressed
Reposted by mr coffee
I want to be more sexual, I’ve decided to become a Disney adult.
October 21, 2025 at 6:23 PM
I want to be more sexual, I’ve decided to become a Disney adult.
Reposted by mr coffee
Seattle says, quoth the Macklemymore nevermore
October 22, 2025 at 12:24 AM
Seattle says, quoth the Macklemymore nevermore
Reposted by mr coffee
why yes, lady with a cracked iPhone, i’d love it if you'd hold my baby
October 21, 2025 at 2:48 PM
why yes, lady with a cracked iPhone, i’d love it if you'd hold my baby
Reposted by mr coffee
My last two brain cells just got into a slap fight over a cookie
October 22, 2025 at 12:14 AM
My last two brain cells just got into a slap fight over a cookie
Reposted by mr coffee
tape measure or measuring tape?
October 22, 2025 at 12:13 AM
tape measure or measuring tape?
Reposted by mr coffee
there is a bat flapping around the print shop I’m working in
October 16, 2025 at 9:27 PM
there is a bat flapping around the print shop I’m working in
TV: *shows US president for even a second*
2yo: I want a DIFFERENT Gru!
2yo: I want a DIFFERENT Gru!
October 14, 2025 at 11:45 AM
TV: *shows US president for even a second*
2yo: I want a DIFFERENT Gru!
2yo: I want a DIFFERENT Gru!
Reposted by mr coffee
Not everyone gets it. I actually prefer it that way
October 11, 2025 at 11:01 PM
Not everyone gets it. I actually prefer it that way
Reposted by mr coffee
Yeah, you're still a party animal if you sometimes want to be in bed by ten on a Saturday. Like a sloth or koala, but an animal.
October 12, 2025 at 2:03 AM
Yeah, you're still a party animal if you sometimes want to be in bed by ten on a Saturday. Like a sloth or koala, but an animal.
Reposted by mr coffee
Time to buttchug a Red Bull and get this party started*
*put on cozy jammies and play video games until I get too sleepy
*put on cozy jammies and play video games until I get too sleepy
October 12, 2025 at 2:04 AM
Time to buttchug a Red Bull and get this party started*
*put on cozy jammies and play video games until I get too sleepy
*put on cozy jammies and play video games until I get too sleepy
Reposted by mr coffee
Stevie Biscuits
-Fleetwood Snack
-Fleetwood Snack
October 12, 2025 at 2:08 AM
Stevie Biscuits
-Fleetwood Snack
-Fleetwood Snack
The car-shaped grocery carts are in high demand on Saturday mornings.
October 11, 2025 at 3:14 PM
The car-shaped grocery carts are in high demand on Saturday mornings.
Reposted by mr coffee
All of my shortcuts just lead to roadblocks
October 11, 2025 at 12:23 AM
All of my shortcuts just lead to roadblocks