Theciscokidder
@theciscokidder.bsky.social
Trying to make you laugh. Stay home dad. Left af. 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
he/him
My fav posts https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lp6wfrs3wtfklh6nfr6ksefh/feed/aaaczmcypwicq
Everyone else's fav posts https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lp6wfrs3wtfklh6nfr6ksefh/feed/aaabm4x5djh5k
he/him
My fav posts https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lp6wfrs3wtfklh6nfr6ksefh/feed/aaaczmcypwicq
Everyone else's fav posts https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lp6wfrs3wtfklh6nfr6ksefh/feed/aaabm4x5djh5k
Pinned
You can never be too safe when driving. *puts on condom*
Reposted by Theciscokidder
my cousin: we’re all checked into the hotel and thought we’d come over and hangout for a bit
me: no
me: no
November 27, 2025 at 12:22 AM
my cousin: we’re all checked into the hotel and thought we’d come over and hangout for a bit
me: no
me: no
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Please stop saying spatchcock.
November 27, 2025 at 12:08 AM
Please stop saying spatchcock.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I just emptied the trash on my phone of all the images I've deleted over the last month and my phone literally weighs less.
November 26, 2025 at 3:57 AM
I just emptied the trash on my phone of all the images I've deleted over the last month and my phone literally weighs less.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I found one of my childhood photos
November 26, 2025 at 3:59 AM
I found one of my childhood photos
Reposted by Theciscokidder
First step of the plan has already failed so it’s actually not over for you bitches.
I have developed a plan.
It’s over for you, bitches.
It’s over for you, bitches.
November 25, 2025 at 8:55 PM
First step of the plan has already failed so it’s actually not over for you bitches.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I know how to make contact with the dead. I've got it down to a séance.
November 25, 2025 at 8:26 PM
I know how to make contact with the dead. I've got it down to a séance.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I made myself a big cup of tea. It was chaigantic.
November 22, 2025 at 8:09 PM
I made myself a big cup of tea. It was chaigantic.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Look i really think you ought to know that i just farted
November 26, 2025 at 10:18 PM
Look i really think you ought to know that i just farted
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Cleaning out that turkey cavity turned out to be a bigger chore than I expected.
Chasing the turkey was a big problem too. Next year, I'm going to kill it first.
Chasing the turkey was a big problem too. Next year, I'm going to kill it first.
November 26, 2025 at 5:52 PM
Cleaning out that turkey cavity turned out to be a bigger chore than I expected.
Chasing the turkey was a big problem too. Next year, I'm going to kill it first.
Chasing the turkey was a big problem too. Next year, I'm going to kill it first.
Now and Later isn't just a candy, it's also how I like my sex.
November 27, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Now and Later isn't just a candy, it's also how I like my sex.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
*takes a leaf blower to my thoughts
November 24, 2025 at 8:24 PM
*takes a leaf blower to my thoughts
Reposted by Theciscokidder
If you’re telling people what to do or how to bsky, I will notice and it’ll go in your file.
November 25, 2025 at 7:05 PM
If you’re telling people what to do or how to bsky, I will notice and it’ll go in your file.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I have developed a plan.
It’s over for you, bitches.
It’s over for you, bitches.
November 25, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I have developed a plan.
It’s over for you, bitches.
It’s over for you, bitches.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
A spittoon and a singing bowl walk into a dark den of deep meditation. Zen says is none of you lost. Singing bowl spits out a mallet and spittoon says see I told you, if you got me hammered they would not be able to tell us apart, that was my cowboy
November 26, 2025 at 5:39 AM
A spittoon and a singing bowl walk into a dark den of deep meditation. Zen says is none of you lost. Singing bowl spits out a mallet and spittoon says see I told you, if you got me hammered they would not be able to tell us apart, that was my cowboy
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I’ve never paid for sex.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
November 26, 2025 at 9:15 PM
I’ve never paid for sex.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
*looks at kids’ tuition bills*
Well, not on the front end.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
gtfo if your cranberry sauce isn’t shaped like a can like nature intended
November 26, 2025 at 1:57 PM
gtfo if your cranberry sauce isn’t shaped like a can like nature intended
Reposted by Theciscokidder
how im rolling up to thanksgiving
November 26, 2025 at 6:40 AM
how im rolling up to thanksgiving
Reposted by Theciscokidder
I prefer solitude too much to compromise with the world.
November 25, 2025 at 12:01 AM
I prefer solitude too much to compromise with the world.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Serving it like this.
Raw.
Deconstructed.
Cold.
Apple pie ala nope.
Raw.
Deconstructed.
Cold.
Apple pie ala nope.
November 26, 2025 at 9:03 PM
Serving it like this.
Raw.
Deconstructed.
Cold.
Apple pie ala nope.
Raw.
Deconstructed.
Cold.
Apple pie ala nope.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
(To the tune of It’s Hip To Be Square) it’s gay to be straight
fellas is it gay to be straight
November 24, 2025 at 2:42 PM
(To the tune of It’s Hip To Be Square) it’s gay to be straight
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Just a reminder... spending time with family out of "obligation" is toxic and a joy sucker.
If you don't like your family - create a "social family" you do like. - THAT is where you should be spending Thanksgiving.❤️
If you don't like your family - create a "social family" you do like. - THAT is where you should be spending Thanksgiving.❤️
November 26, 2025 at 5:29 PM
Just a reminder... spending time with family out of "obligation" is toxic and a joy sucker.
If you don't like your family - create a "social family" you do like. - THAT is where you should be spending Thanksgiving.❤️
If you don't like your family - create a "social family" you do like. - THAT is where you should be spending Thanksgiving.❤️
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Thanksgiving is gonna be lit.
November 26, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Thanksgiving is gonna be lit.
Reposted by Theciscokidder
Weeks ago, the (new) fan was making a tapping sound so I pulled it apart and tightened the blade. Tapping stopped. Now it has returned. I was about to pull it apart to inspect it again when I looked down and noticed the fan leg touching the wall. Moved it away from the wall. Tapping stopped. 👀🤦♀️😂
November 26, 2025 at 7:47 AM
Weeks ago, the (new) fan was making a tapping sound so I pulled it apart and tightened the blade. Tapping stopped. Now it has returned. I was about to pull it apart to inspect it again when I looked down and noticed the fan leg touching the wall. Moved it away from the wall. Tapping stopped. 👀🤦♀️😂
Reposted by Theciscokidder
