Dan Cerinthedark
@etbeeegood.bsky.social
Disgraced former Rollerblade Champion
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ctmnbym24srxgghbcmdynzqq/feed/aaablk4s3yrag
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ctmnbym24srxgghbcmdynzqq/feed/aaablk4s3yrag
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Them: any plans for Christmas?
Me: yeah! dissociating but like with a festive nail color
Me: yeah! dissociating but like with a festive nail color
November 28, 2025 at 5:29 PM
Them: any plans for Christmas?
Me: yeah! dissociating but like with a festive nail color
Me: yeah! dissociating but like with a festive nail color
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
You need to Chex yourself before you wrex yourself.
November 29, 2025 at 1:08 AM
You need to Chex yourself before you wrex yourself.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
🎶last Christmas I gave you Paul Blart.
But the very next day, you threw the DVD away🎶
But the very next day, you threw the DVD away🎶
November 29, 2025 at 12:37 AM
🎶last Christmas I gave you Paul Blart.
But the very next day, you threw the DVD away🎶
But the very next day, you threw the DVD away🎶
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
I haven’t updated my gps since 2007 if anyone needs to get to Kmart
November 29, 2025 at 12:37 AM
I haven’t updated my gps since 2007 if anyone needs to get to Kmart
Locking eyes as I lean in, our breath’s baited with butter, noses touch…
November 29, 2025 at 1:21 AM
Locking eyes as I lean in, our breath’s baited with butter, noses touch…
bye bye piece of Chex mix that fell in the couch you live there now foreva
November 29, 2025 at 1:07 AM
bye bye piece of Chex mix that fell in the couch you live there now foreva
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
putting tums on my pizza to save time
November 28, 2025 at 10:07 PM
putting tums on my pizza to save time
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
something happened to my brain yesterday and now I can’t post good
November 28, 2025 at 10:18 PM
something happened to my brain yesterday and now I can’t post good
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Right before he went into attack mode. My new friend/enemy.
November 28, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Right before he went into attack mode. My new friend/enemy.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
[prince, working on lyrics]
she had a red hat on. looked like it was thrifted.
she had a red hat on. looked like it was thrifted.
November 28, 2025 at 9:55 PM
[prince, working on lyrics]
she had a red hat on. looked like it was thrifted.
she had a red hat on. looked like it was thrifted.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
i can’t possibly do any more work today (i haven’t done any) so it’s time to spin around in my chair until closing time
November 28, 2025 at 9:52 PM
i can’t possibly do any more work today (i haven’t done any) so it’s time to spin around in my chair until closing time
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Me at the gun store: what's the mouthfeel like on this one?
November 28, 2025 at 11:31 PM
Me at the gun store: what's the mouthfeel like on this one?
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
when the Christmas tune you're enjoying turns into a Rod Stewart duet
November 28, 2025 at 8:55 PM
when the Christmas tune you're enjoying turns into a Rod Stewart duet
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
The pie filling became the filling in me. I am pie. Pie is I. We are pie.
November 28, 2025 at 6:25 PM
The pie filling became the filling in me. I am pie. Pie is I. We are pie.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Happily eating hard bread like a peasant
November 28, 2025 at 6:51 PM
Happily eating hard bread like a peasant
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
I’m riding shotgun with my 77 year old mom at the wheel.
She’s already told a passing patrolman to shove it up his “rectum” 😳.
I’m prepared for just about anything with this woman.
She’s already told a passing patrolman to shove it up his “rectum” 😳.
I’m prepared for just about anything with this woman.
November 28, 2025 at 6:54 PM
I’m riding shotgun with my 77 year old mom at the wheel.
She’s already told a passing patrolman to shove it up his “rectum” 😳.
I’m prepared for just about anything with this woman.
She’s already told a passing patrolman to shove it up his “rectum” 😳.
I’m prepared for just about anything with this woman.
sorry but something’s off with your soup that smells like sweaty ass
*finishes the soup to make sure
*finishes the soup to make sure
November 28, 2025 at 10:13 PM
sorry but something’s off with your soup that smells like sweaty ass
*finishes the soup to make sure
*finishes the soup to make sure
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
I'm the human equivalent of a bag of microwave popcorn that is slightly burned but also somehow has a bunch of unpopped kernels at the bottom
November 28, 2025 at 8:31 PM
I'm the human equivalent of a bag of microwave popcorn that is slightly burned but also somehow has a bunch of unpopped kernels at the bottom
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Spotify Wrapped 2025: white noise 3 hour long (on loop)
November 28, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Spotify Wrapped 2025: white noise 3 hour long (on loop)
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Me: So like, did you get bitten by a piano?
Billy Joel: Don't ever speak to me again.
Billy Joel: Don't ever speak to me again.
November 28, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Me: So like, did you get bitten by a piano?
Billy Joel: Don't ever speak to me again.
Billy Joel: Don't ever speak to me again.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Well that’s enough of being out of bed for one day
*this user has been awake for 3 hours
*this user has been awake for 3 hours
November 28, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Well that’s enough of being out of bed for one day
*this user has been awake for 3 hours
*this user has been awake for 3 hours
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
i come from a long line of self-deprecationists
November 28, 2025 at 8:31 PM
i come from a long line of self-deprecationists