Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
@void0reason.bsky.social
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone and whatnot.
The views expressed are probably not those of Percy Bysshe Shelley.
The views expressed are probably not those of Percy Bysshe Shelley.
Pinned
I don’t believe in hell but I’m willing to make some exceptions.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Me: “Doctor, can I get an STD in a public restroom?”
Gynecologist*: “Sure, but there are much more comfortable places.”
*For people in Alabama, a gynecologist is a type of doctor who attends to women's health needs.
Gynecologist*: “Sure, but there are much more comfortable places.”
*For people in Alabama, a gynecologist is a type of doctor who attends to women's health needs.
November 17, 2025 at 5:53 PM
Me: “Doctor, can I get an STD in a public restroom?”
Gynecologist*: “Sure, but there are much more comfortable places.”
*For people in Alabama, a gynecologist is a type of doctor who attends to women's health needs.
Gynecologist*: “Sure, but there are much more comfortable places.”
*For people in Alabama, a gynecologist is a type of doctor who attends to women's health needs.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Being weird and tone deaf is half the battle
November 17, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Being weird and tone deaf is half the battle
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Me: “Doctor, I think I'm going deaf."
Doctor: “Describe the symptoms."
Me: “Well, Homer is bald and Marge has blue hair.”
Doctor: “Describe the symptoms."
Me: “Well, Homer is bald and Marge has blue hair.”
November 17, 2025 at 5:58 PM
Me: “Doctor, I think I'm going deaf."
Doctor: “Describe the symptoms."
Me: “Well, Homer is bald and Marge has blue hair.”
Doctor: “Describe the symptoms."
Me: “Well, Homer is bald and Marge has blue hair.”
Checking the schedule in vain for the last train to Parksville…
November 17, 2025 at 6:28 PM
Checking the schedule in vain for the last train to Parksville…
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Today, Paste Magazine shuttered all its non-music verticals, a choice I am both professionally and personally heartbroken about. Sadly, I am once again looking for a place that wants to let me write about Books and TV on the regular, so hit me up if that’s you or anyone you know.
November 17, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Today, Paste Magazine shuttered all its non-music verticals, a choice I am both professionally and personally heartbroken about. Sadly, I am once again looking for a place that wants to let me write about Books and TV on the regular, so hit me up if that’s you or anyone you know.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Just saw very alarming, state-sponsored antifa messaging on the side of the road. “Keep Left?” Property of the DMV? This woke agenda has gone too far
November 17, 2025 at 1:21 PM
Just saw very alarming, state-sponsored antifa messaging on the side of the road. “Keep Left?” Property of the DMV? This woke agenda has gone too far
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
It’s tough out there
November 21, 2024 at 4:10 AM
It’s tough out there
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
You can't just make fish and herb puns willy nilly, there's a thyme and plaice
November 16, 2025 at 6:27 PM
You can't just make fish and herb puns willy nilly, there's a thyme and plaice
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Please don't reply to nonpolitical jokes with politics. Yeah, I hate him too. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺. Crazy, right?
November 16, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Please don't reply to nonpolitical jokes with politics. Yeah, I hate him too. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺. Crazy, right?
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Feelings: the original malware.
November 16, 2025 at 1:25 PM
Feelings: the original malware.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Fully Organic and Biodegradable cartoonist here. Dinktoons on Instagram www.instagram.com/dinktoons (I'm about a year behind on my website updates!)
November 16, 2025 at 1:16 PM
Fully Organic and Biodegradable cartoonist here. Dinktoons on Instagram www.instagram.com/dinktoons (I'm about a year behind on my website updates!)
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
The Surprising Mental Toll Of Having Too Much Money To Spend - How The Ultrarich Are Coping
- tomorrow’s NYT
- tomorrow’s NYT
November 16, 2025 at 12:29 PM
The Surprising Mental Toll Of Having Too Much Money To Spend - How The Ultrarich Are Coping
- tomorrow’s NYT
- tomorrow’s NYT
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Teenagers are old enough to have sex with middle aged men. They are not old enough to be trans.
by Megyn Kelly
by Megyn Kelly
November 16, 2025 at 12:57 PM
Teenagers are old enough to have sex with middle aged men. They are not old enough to be trans.
by Megyn Kelly
by Megyn Kelly
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Whether it’s Barack Obama, appearing in a tan suit or Donald Trump appearing 1700 times in Jeffrey Epstein‘s emails, both presidents made some highly controversial appearances.
November 15, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Whether it’s Barack Obama, appearing in a tan suit or Donald Trump appearing 1700 times in Jeffrey Epstein‘s emails, both presidents made some highly controversial appearances.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
As I get older and I remember all of the people I lost along the way I think to myself, maybe a career as a tour guide wasn’t for me
September 3, 2024 at 2:21 PM
As I get older and I remember all of the people I lost along the way I think to myself, maybe a career as a tour guide wasn’t for me
I am reliably informed by a very not-spoiled cat that it’s time for crunchy snacks.
November 15, 2025 at 1:59 PM
I am reliably informed by a very not-spoiled cat that it’s time for crunchy snacks.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
When someone asks where I came from I say I think I came from my dad’s left testicle because I’m definitely not right.
November 15, 2025 at 1:56 AM
When someone asks where I came from I say I think I came from my dad’s left testicle because I’m definitely not right.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
I've thought about wearing an Al Roker mask, carrying a chainsaw and calling myself Weather Face.
November 14, 2025 at 7:40 PM
I've thought about wearing an Al Roker mask, carrying a chainsaw and calling myself Weather Face.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Goon a movie
The Goon, the Bad and the Ugly
The Goon, the Bad and the Ugly
Goon a movie
"Paper Goon"
"Paper Goon"
Goon a movie
"Goongarry Goon Ross"
"Goongarry Goon Ross"
November 12, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Goon a movie
The Goon, the Bad and the Ugly
The Goon, the Bad and the Ugly
Almost 300 characters to say, “I don’t give a fuck about accessibility.”
November 15, 2025 at 10:35 AM
Almost 300 characters to say, “I don’t give a fuck about accessibility.”
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
Props to this guy.
November 14, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Props to this guy.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
I’m just a badly drawn soliloquy.
November 14, 2025 at 11:56 AM
I’m just a badly drawn soliloquy.
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
A brief thread on alt-text.
Alt text is descriptive text that conveys the meaning of an image. It's designed to make visual content accessible to people with vision disabilities. When a person uses assistive technology such as a screen reader, the screen reader will read the onscreen text aloud 1/7
Alt text is descriptive text that conveys the meaning of an image. It's designed to make visual content accessible to people with vision disabilities. When a person uses assistive technology such as a screen reader, the screen reader will read the onscreen text aloud 1/7
November 19, 2024 at 12:30 PM
A brief thread on alt-text.
Alt text is descriptive text that conveys the meaning of an image. It's designed to make visual content accessible to people with vision disabilities. When a person uses assistive technology such as a screen reader, the screen reader will read the onscreen text aloud 1/7
Alt text is descriptive text that conveys the meaning of an image. It's designed to make visual content accessible to people with vision disabilities. When a person uses assistive technology such as a screen reader, the screen reader will read the onscreen text aloud 1/7
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
listen if they didn't want me to put this meat in a blunt they shouldn't have called it a pot roast
November 13, 2025 at 4:38 PM
listen if they didn't want me to put this meat in a blunt they shouldn't have called it a pot roast
Reposted by Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®
