Author | Lightnews

Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

@byronpdye.com

340 followers 590 following 1.9K posts

I live in a barn. Peace to you human.

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 6d

Not a fan of the snuff films they've been showing lately on CNN

Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 1h

"Now my hand's going to smell like burger."

President Xi looking away, hoping this clown got ahold of his hand would just shut up.

Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Dr. Antifa @darkhofstadter.bsky.social · Dec 17

Is it food?

A CNN headline that reads “Taco Bell is adding something unusual to its menu.”

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 1h

'He's still repeating that lie...'

Here's a video of him repeating that lie...

Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Leen McBeans 🦇 @leenmcbeans.bsky.social · 9d

Quick reminder that if hating yourself actually changed who you are in the ways you want, it would’ve worked by now

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Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Dutchy Patrick @dutchiepatrick.bsky.social · 5h

US Amassador to the UN Mike Waltz was interrupted and humiliated for lying during his speech this week and called out for his involvement in a leaked Signal group chat.

Cuban Foreign Minister Bruno Rodriguez slammed his remarks as “uncivilized, crude and gross”.

Boommmmm 💣💣💣……well done Cuba!!!!

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 4h

This shouldn't be satire, also the fellas on Grindr should be doing the same. What I really mean is #satire. He shall live forever.

Humor For Resistance @funnysnarkyjoke.bsky.social · 5h

#satire

thehalfwaypost

BREAKING Women associated with the secretive feminist mafia called The Cliterati are reportedly going On dates with as many ICE agents as they can to take photos of them without masks, dox them, and reveal embarrassing things about them publicly.

sage_is_spicy - pure poetry

Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Mekka Okereke @mekka.mekka-tech.com · 5h

🤔 "urban."

🤔"Pro-rural."

Use these words in a sentence.

* The teacher used chalk to write on the urbanboard.
* My favorite fairytale is Snow rural and the seven dwarves.

G Elliott Morris @gelliottmorris.com · 23h

in other words, an urban party cannot win in a pro-rural electoral system when party brands are nationalized

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 5h

Had this great idea, I call it "Debtor's Prison" you put the person in debt in prison, so they can never do anything worthy of a wage to pay it back! Every Republican says this will work great and it will help capitalism.

Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 5h

If you see this, quote with a robot that isn’t from “Star Wars,” “Star Trek,” “Doctor Who,” or “Transformers".

Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 5h

Nyeh-ngmmmm-ugh I can't do it right.

Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 22h

happenis is a warm- you know what, nevermind

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Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 18h

This couch needs to calm the fuck down.

A brown and not so brown couch with sconces that look suspect.

Like emotionally erect. Engorged perhaps.

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 15h

Hope she's doing alright.

Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 15h

Found a little black jumping spider on my visor driving back home from my job today. She had little gold marks on her ass. She checked out the window pillar and my oil change reminder. Then she disappeared, probably hiding inside the trim panel, making a little house for jumping. Miss her already.

Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 15h

Sorry, I don't read Hittite

Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 21h

Food was bad, cabins were dirty, everyone but me was gruesomely killed. Liked the paddle boats. 1/2 star. -Yelp review of Camp Crystal Lake

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 16h

Change one letter. Ruin a candy.

Reese's Peanus Butter Cups

🇨🇦 Odd Boo 👻 <🖕🍊> @toddalio.bsky.social · 20h

Change one letter. Run a candy.

Hog Lips

👻Spook of URL😱 @dookofurl.bsky.social · 22h

Change one letter. Ruin a candy.

Footsie Roll

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Reposted by Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻

Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 1d

Where were you when you first lost the plot to Pirates of the Caribbean? I was standing at the counter watching the concessionaire pump chemical butter into my big bucket of buttered popcorn. “Don’t stop,” I remember telling him, a look of disbelief on his face.

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Byron Aces & 8s Dye 🔻 @byronpdye.com · 16h

I regularly used a meat fork for awhile, thinking, I'm an adult, I can have pointy, dangerous, tines. It was just comically large in my fist, so I went back. Miss that meat fork.