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sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy
@sqrlymofo.bsky.social
740 followers 160 following 5.4K posts
A high AF goddamn Internet Squirrel, what the fuck more do you want? I'm here, I'm your little ray of sunshine. ABSOLUTELY NO STARTER PACKS https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaao2bqerpveq
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sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · Jan 24
You'll fuck better on a Stearns and Foster.
1 39 110
Reposted by Miss Suzy
cosmicallyf.bsky.social
Cosmically Funny @cosmicallyf.bsky.social · 3h
Fresh squirt doesn't have a grapefruit flavor like the bottled stuff.
1 2
Reposted by Miss Suzy
johnlyon.bsky.social
John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 7h
My bank's website is one letter off from a gross German porn site and it's annoying because I keep accidentally visiting my bank's website.
7 50 290
Reposted by Miss Suzy
weeder.bsky.social
weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 8h
It's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt. Then it's fun and games and laughter
2 17 96
Reposted by Miss Suzy
honeybadgermel.bsky.social
Melicious @honeybadgermel.bsky.social · 5d
I prefer my chocolate milk shaken not stirred.
31 64
Reposted by Miss Suzy
jennydoesntknow.bsky.social
Jenny Doesn’t Know @jennydoesntknow.bsky.social · 7h
Yeah I bought a bag a candy corn. I’m throwing them at people I don’t like.
5 17
Reposted by Miss Suzy
linanneblack.bsky.social
Tippi Hedren Collider @linanneblack.bsky.social · 8h
Get stuffed [seasonal]
17 43
Reposted by Miss Suzy
midnightviolets.bsky.social
LovelyDeep @midnightviolets.bsky.social · 1d
“don’t crush your finger, finger your crush” or something like that
1 23 81
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 7h
Church up the road with leaky roof bought a Charlie Kirk banner large enough to completely cover one side of the building. Now they're paying a private company to provide security for said banner. A smarter religious cult would just buy a banner big enough to cover the goddamn roof.
1
Reposted by Miss Suzy
corduroycheddar.bsky.social
Corduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 23h
You're the woman of my dreams but the woman is an old lady with purple hair who pops up out of nowhere telling me she's very disappointed in me
11 36
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 1d
Could go for cheese. Could.
1
Reposted by Miss Suzy
souriscerise.bsky.social
Sourise @souriscerise.bsky.social · 1d
make cheese not war
2 5 11
Reposted by Miss Suzy
deviwestside.bsky.social
Devi 🧙‍♀️✨ @deviwestside.bsky.social · 1d
If you’re ashamed of me that’s crazy because I’m literally adorable and only cry like twice a day
5 14 73
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 1d
Offended AND I'll go to bed mad, thank you very much.
1 2
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 1d
There's got to be somebody out there that would get off on trimming my toenails. Come on. My feet. So far away.
2
Reposted by Miss Suzy
seanpaulmahoney.bsky.social
feral streep @seanpaulmahoney.bsky.social · 1d
I’ll gladly ride the dick of whoever it was who invented tomato paste in a tube. 10/10 food innovation
19 3 230
Reposted by Miss Suzy
lordjuiblex.bsky.social
Lord Juiblex @lordjuiblex.bsky.social · 1d
Let's drink mugwort tea before bed and have fucked up dreams.
6 4 39
Reposted by Miss Suzy
tweedle.bsky.social
🎃🐄🐤🐤🐤 @tweedle.bsky.social · 1d
extra long charging cables make me feel like a decadent slut
1 19 110
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 1d
(opens door all the way)
1
Reposted by Miss Suzy
cosmicallyf.bsky.social
Cosmically Funny @cosmicallyf.bsky.social · 1d
I'll brush your tail.
1 4 6
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 1d
Giving each boob a playful slap once I've crammed it into my bra:

Alright team, let's go to the hardware store.
1 7 19
Reposted by Miss Suzy
hatesnicethings.bsky.social
Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 2d
Sometimes during a conversation I actually run out of awkward and my soul leaves to smoke behind the 7-11.
5 14
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 2d
Pothead Suzy here with the Too High report:

I am too high.
1 6
sqrlymofo.bsky.social
Miss Suzy @sqrlymofo.bsky.social · 2d
Lubricate your snake, M'lady?
1 3
Reposted by Miss Suzy
valleyguitarist.bsky.social
Lee Harveryscary @valleyguitarist.bsky.social · 2d
People say snake oil salesperson derogatorily but it's actually a really difficult job, because so few people have snakes that require lubricaction
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