≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
@seelion.bsky.social
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
ARE YOU SAYING THE INTERNET HAS LIED TO ME?!
November 25, 2025 at 3:22 AM
ARE YOU SAYING THE INTERNET HAS LIED TO ME?!
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
Last night, I was bitten by a radioactive lawyer and woke up with power of attorney.
November 18, 2025 at 2:19 PM
Last night, I was bitten by a radioactive lawyer and woke up with power of attorney.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
Uh-oh someone taught the menswear guy about kerning.
crazy how much this bugs me now that someone pointed it out. if i worked at the white house, i would find this ugly, but not as annoying as i do now. ignorance is really bliss bc they more you learn, the more you just walk around thinking "collar gap" and "kerning is off."
November 12, 2025 at 7:20 AM
Uh-oh someone taught the menswear guy about kerning.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
Joyce Carol Oates sitting across a desk from Kendrick Lamar:
"So I'm putting a team together..."
Isaac Chotiner knocks on the open door.
"So I'm putting a team together..."
Isaac Chotiner knocks on the open door.
Personally, I will be trying to avoid the notice of Joyce Carol Oates and Kendrick Lamar for the rest of my natural life
I need Joyce Carol Oates to be mean to me online so I can get my life together
November 11, 2025 at 7:24 PM
Joyce Carol Oates sitting across a desk from Kendrick Lamar:
"So I'm putting a team together..."
Isaac Chotiner knocks on the open door.
"So I'm putting a team together..."
Isaac Chotiner knocks on the open door.
A movie you've seen more than seven times with a gif.
November 3, 2025 at 3:39 PM
A movie you've seen more than seven times with a gif.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
TOLKIEN: So then Turin, upon realizing he fucked his sister, killed himself. His father, broken by the tortures of Satan and mad with grief… Stop sobbing, boy.
CHRISTOPHER: Daddy, I’m six.
TOLKIEN: Oh fine, you little shit. Once upon a time there was a hairy little midget that lived in a hole...
CHRISTOPHER: Daddy, I’m six.
TOLKIEN: Oh fine, you little shit. Once upon a time there was a hairy little midget that lived in a hole...
October 26, 2025 at 9:51 PM
TOLKIEN: So then Turin, upon realizing he fucked his sister, killed himself. His father, broken by the tortures of Satan and mad with grief… Stop sobbing, boy.
CHRISTOPHER: Daddy, I’m six.
TOLKIEN: Oh fine, you little shit. Once upon a time there was a hairy little midget that lived in a hole...
CHRISTOPHER: Daddy, I’m six.
TOLKIEN: Oh fine, you little shit. Once upon a time there was a hairy little midget that lived in a hole...
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
The most Jewish thing is to tell other Jews they’re doing it wrong. The second most Jewish thing is to be wary of people who aren’t Jewish saying Jews are doing it wrong. The third most Jewish thing is the nine days.
July 28, 2025 at 12:19 PM
The most Jewish thing is to tell other Jews they’re doing it wrong. The second most Jewish thing is to be wary of people who aren’t Jewish saying Jews are doing it wrong. The third most Jewish thing is the nine days.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
CHOTINER: So you asked for a Birkin bag?
KOKO: Yes. Possession Bag.
CHOTINER: And you had the funds to acquire this?
KOKO: No, Professor Purchase Koko Gorilla
CHOTINER: That doesn't sound like the funds were justifiable.
KOKO: Hostility Interviewer
KOKO: Yes. Possession Bag.
CHOTINER: And you had the funds to acquire this?
KOKO: No, Professor Purchase Koko Gorilla
CHOTINER: That doesn't sound like the funds were justifiable.
KOKO: Hostility Interviewer
October 28, 2025 at 4:09 PM
CHOTINER: So you asked for a Birkin bag?
KOKO: Yes. Possession Bag.
CHOTINER: And you had the funds to acquire this?
KOKO: No, Professor Purchase Koko Gorilla
CHOTINER: That doesn't sound like the funds were justifiable.
KOKO: Hostility Interviewer
KOKO: Yes. Possession Bag.
CHOTINER: And you had the funds to acquire this?
KOKO: No, Professor Purchase Koko Gorilla
CHOTINER: That doesn't sound like the funds were justifiable.
KOKO: Hostility Interviewer
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
Liberal purity tests are out of control. You can't even have Nazi tattoos now.
October 23, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Liberal purity tests are out of control. You can't even have Nazi tattoos now.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
A+, no notes. Also, you’re wrong.
October 24, 2025 at 2:39 PM
A+, no notes. Also, you’re wrong.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
this one doin numbers on mastodon but bsky doesn't let me have enough characters
October 16, 2025 at 10:30 PM
this one doin numbers on mastodon but bsky doesn't let me have enough characters
Interfaith dialogue can be difficult because we often don't agree on the meaning of key concepts or terms
BUT we must accept that our colloqutor's religion is valid & complete *for them*
Shit like this is egregious, counterproductive & occurs all too often when Christians engage with Jews.
BUT we must accept that our colloqutor's religion is valid & complete *for them*
Shit like this is egregious, counterproductive & occurs all too often when Christians engage with Jews.
Hilarious to say your faith is complete, but you’re still waiting for something
October 20, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Interfaith dialogue can be difficult because we often don't agree on the meaning of key concepts or terms
BUT we must accept that our colloqutor's religion is valid & complete *for them*
Shit like this is egregious, counterproductive & occurs all too often when Christians engage with Jews.
BUT we must accept that our colloqutor's religion is valid & complete *for them*
Shit like this is egregious, counterproductive & occurs all too often when Christians engage with Jews.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
guy who brought the trans flag we iwo jima’d described himself as “yeah i was pretty neutral about trans people, think i still am honestly, but these people are being so goddamn weird about it that i gotta get off the fence”
October 18, 2025 at 9:29 PM
guy who brought the trans flag we iwo jima’d described himself as “yeah i was pretty neutral about trans people, think i still am honestly, but these people are being so goddamn weird about it that i gotta get off the fence”
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
Unlike Jesus, I have returned.
The all-knowing bsky mods gave Erin Biba a 24 hour suspension for a months-old skeet about Christian Zionism, and I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that this happened when she’s been vocally criticizing Jay
October 6, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Unlike Jesus, I have returned.
And we’ll fucking do it again!
Honestly, I wish we *did* have this power to use against dumb fuck bigots.
Fucking putz
Honestly, I wish we *did* have this power to use against dumb fuck bigots.
Fucking putz
October 5, 2025 at 7:18 PM
And we’ll fucking do it again!
Honestly, I wish we *did* have this power to use against dumb fuck bigots.
Fucking putz
Honestly, I wish we *did* have this power to use against dumb fuck bigots.
Fucking putz
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
No you don’t get it when I said popular front I meant my front gets to be popular
October 4, 2025 at 6:04 PM
No you don’t get it when I said popular front I meant my front gets to be popular
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
CHOTINER: And you thought it would be funny to do a fake interview by me?
ME: A lot of people have, so
CHOTINER: You were looking for engagement?
ME: Well, to make someone laugh I guess
CHOTINER: How many likes and reposts did it get?
ME: That's, uh, not really the metric...look can we start over
ME: A lot of people have, so
CHOTINER: You were looking for engagement?
ME: Well, to make someone laugh I guess
CHOTINER: How many likes and reposts did it get?
ME: That's, uh, not really the metric...look can we start over
September 24, 2025 at 10:49 PM
CHOTINER: And you thought it would be funny to do a fake interview by me?
ME: A lot of people have, so
CHOTINER: You were looking for engagement?
ME: Well, to make someone laugh I guess
CHOTINER: How many likes and reposts did it get?
ME: That's, uh, not really the metric...look can we start over
ME: A lot of people have, so
CHOTINER: You were looking for engagement?
ME: Well, to make someone laugh I guess
CHOTINER: How many likes and reposts did it get?
ME: That's, uh, not really the metric...look can we start over
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
THEY'RE CALLED MECHA, COOP. REAL WACKADOO STUFF THE BOYS BACK AT LANGLEY HAVE BEEN COOKING UP. ENORMOUS ROBOT BODIES THAT'LL WIN THE NEXT TEN WARS. BUT HERES THE KICKER: THEY CAN ONLY BE DRIVEN BY MALNOURISHED TEENAGE LESBIANS. TRANSGENDERS TOO IF THEY'RE MALNOURISHED ENOUGH.
September 7, 2025 at 5:26 AM
THEY'RE CALLED MECHA, COOP. REAL WACKADOO STUFF THE BOYS BACK AT LANGLEY HAVE BEEN COOKING UP. ENORMOUS ROBOT BODIES THAT'LL WIN THE NEXT TEN WARS. BUT HERES THE KICKER: THEY CAN ONLY BE DRIVEN BY MALNOURISHED TEENAGE LESBIANS. TRANSGENDERS TOO IF THEY'RE MALNOURISHED ENOUGH.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
So um. This is what's been up with me for the last year. I hate hate hate asking but very much appreciate your support. www.gofundme.com/f/fund-me-if...
Donate to GoFundMe If You Like Me: I Got Sued for Tweeting, organized by Detective Pikajew
Two years ago, I made a Twitter thread about a lawsuit I’d come acr… Detective Pikajew needs your support for GoFundMe If You Like Me: I Got Sued for Tweeting
www.gofundme.com
September 19, 2025 at 5:53 PM
So um. This is what's been up with me for the last year. I hate hate hate asking but very much appreciate your support. www.gofundme.com/f/fund-me-if...
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
Was an extremely ugly baby born?
September 16, 2025 at 12:50 PM
Was an extremely ugly baby born?
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
For the record.
My posts were not even about Kirk directly, but about America's apathy towards political violence, and the coddling of white male shooters and hate peddlers.
I was fired because I mentioned race: white men and violence-- that was my "gross misconduct."
My posts were not even about Kirk directly, but about America's apathy towards political violence, and the coddling of white male shooters and hate peddlers.
I was fired because I mentioned race: white men and violence-- that was my "gross misconduct."
September 15, 2025 at 4:48 PM
For the record.
My posts were not even about Kirk directly, but about America's apathy towards political violence, and the coddling of white male shooters and hate peddlers.
I was fired because I mentioned race: white men and violence-- that was my "gross misconduct."
My posts were not even about Kirk directly, but about America's apathy towards political violence, and the coddling of white male shooters and hate peddlers.
I was fired because I mentioned race: white men and violence-- that was my "gross misconduct."
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
[ancient egyptian standup comic] see guys from the upper kingdom, they observe funerary rites like THIS. but us guys from the lower kingdom, we observe funerary rites like THIS. See this guy knows what I’m talking about [pointing at man with the head of a bird]
September 6, 2025 at 2:55 PM
[ancient egyptian standup comic] see guys from the upper kingdom, they observe funerary rites like THIS. but us guys from the lower kingdom, we observe funerary rites like THIS. See this guy knows what I’m talking about [pointing at man with the head of a bird]
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
NIXON: The ocean, it judges a man through his trunks. Mine? Broad, dark, American. For men who build things. Not like those flimsy little Euro numbers—high-cut, tight, shiny. Made for loafers and hairdressers.
EHRLICHMAN: You mean the French?
NIXON: I said loafers, didn’t I?
HALDEMAN: [inaudible]
EHRLICHMAN: You mean the French?
NIXON: I said loafers, didn’t I?
HALDEMAN: [inaudible]
July 5, 2025 at 1:26 AM
NIXON: The ocean, it judges a man through his trunks. Mine? Broad, dark, American. For men who build things. Not like those flimsy little Euro numbers—high-cut, tight, shiny. Made for loafers and hairdressers.
EHRLICHMAN: You mean the French?
NIXON: I said loafers, didn’t I?
HALDEMAN: [inaudible]
EHRLICHMAN: You mean the French?
NIXON: I said loafers, didn’t I?
HALDEMAN: [inaudible]
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
A small Spaniard the size of a large Spaniard.
August 19, 2025 at 4:40 AM
A small Spaniard the size of a large Spaniard.
Reposted by ≠ Sea Lion כלב ים
excuse me, we toss trash BAGS into the street. then our rats chew holes into the bags and spread the trash around. it's called an ✨ecosystem✨
August 13, 2025 at 2:06 PM
excuse me, we toss trash BAGS into the street. then our rats chew holes into the bags and spread the trash around. it's called an ✨ecosystem✨