Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
banner
clapifyoulikeme.favrd.social
Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
@clapifyoulikeme.favrd.social
“Lesbian consultant.” “The Chappell Roan of twitter” (and maybe bluesky?) “A good argument, just miles outside the scope.” Union girlie powered by iced tea and Carly Rae. Please be normal in my mentions.
Pinned
Finally logged, as best as I can tell, every one of my Cats (2019) viewings.
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
the makers of escape from ever after are cooking in ways ao3 can’t even imagine. cthulhu and sherlock holmes just got married.
February 14, 2026 at 5:29 AM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
It's so funny because the last election the camps were literally:

- the president *will* be sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people (mom party being hysterical)
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $104.9 will cost $100 (dad party focusing on REAL issues)
February 14, 2026 at 11:40 PM
February 14, 2026 at 11:37 PM
Loving v. Virginia: Laser Eyes Edition
y’all are talking about Woke 2.0 but just ignoring Woke 0
February 14, 2026 at 11:36 PM
Baby boy has figured out how to lounge and play at the same time
February 14, 2026 at 11:25 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
One job of a properly functioning government is to keep the horrors of American policing far away from the lived reality of median white voters. Many can only support "tough on crime/illegals" in theory
straight out of those Civil War histories where some ill informed white Union soldier got a view of slavery up close and became hyper abolitionist in an instant
Yesterday morning kids were sent running from their bus stop in panic because ICE showed up. This guy at today’s ICE Out of Lindenwold protest is a must watch 😭. @maddow.bsky.social
February 14, 2026 at 11:22 PM
Only one of these weddings was queer, absolutely insufficient. In woke 2 there will be NO cishet weddings.
Everyone in the world comes to get married at the NYC Marriage Bureau. Last week, the Mayor stopped by to officiate a few of those ceremonies. 
 
Thank you to all the couples who shared their joy with us. Happy Valentine's Day, New York. 
 
 Watch the full video at Youtube.com/nycmayorsoffice
February 14, 2026 at 11:22 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
unfortunately to a significant portion of the american people it turns out the answer is (b)
hello and welcome to the political genius exam. here is question one. which is a more compelling message:

- the president is sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people and your town could be next
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $100 now costs $104.9
Romance alert: Trump's reckless tariffs have Valentine’s Day costs up across the board:

Roses 🌹16.6%
Chocolates🍫 18.7%
Ribeye 🥩 25.4%
Restaurant meals 🍽️ 4.9%
February 14, 2026 at 7:25 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
Cat allergies aren’t real, it’s just misogyny
February 13, 2026 at 7:00 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
My local county Republican party just announced their endorsed slate for 2026 and I know it doesn't really matter but I am going to be cackling over the fact there's more Patricks than women for days. I'll be standing in Wegmans, picking out oranges or something and just start laughing.
February 14, 2026 at 10:00 PM
Concerned I may be getting psyopped into seeing Wuthering Heights
February 14, 2026 at 10:00 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
"I hear kids don't get exposed to violent cartoons like they did back in the 80's, so their minds and bodies aren't ready for the real world when Cobra or Skeletor enact their world and or universal domination schemes. It's likely not a factor here, but possible."
February 14, 2026 at 9:25 PM
The kids’ bones are too frail, due to woke…
Sorry for posting X but I love a good dumb guy medical take. “Likely not a factor here”
February 14, 2026 at 9:16 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
hi, judge expert here, judges only do this when they're in extreme distress!
storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
February 14, 2026 at 6:24 AM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
Welp, I just canceled my Jimmy Fallon pasta sauce release party. Not getting a refund on my deposit for the venue or the DJ equipment. Fml. No DMs please
February 14, 2026 at 7:44 PM
unfortunately to a significant portion of the american people it turns out the answer is (b)
hello and welcome to the political genius exam. here is question one. which is a more compelling message:

- the president is sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people and your town could be next
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $100 now costs $104.9
Romance alert: Trump's reckless tariffs have Valentine’s Day costs up across the board:

Roses 🌹16.6%
Chocolates🍫 18.7%
Ribeye 🥩 25.4%
Restaurant meals 🍽️ 4.9%
February 14, 2026 at 7:25 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
was trying to recall the Lily Allen song where she sings "don't you want to have somebody who objectifies you" (it's "Hard Out Here") and stumbled onto maybe the most deranged set of lyrics in existence
February 14, 2026 at 6:09 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
seems a good day to remind everyone how much liz bruenig cares about being accurate
April 12, 2025 at 6:17 PM
oh my god
I was so impressed with this story about measles in the Atlantic -- the depth of reporting it would take to weave in all these details so fluidly.

Turns out, it was a work of fiction. She researched the effects of measles, but lots of fiction writers do research. www.niemanlab.org/2026/02/the-...
The Atlantic’s Elizabeth Bruenig on her “hypothetical,” heavily reported measles essay
"We were attracted to the idea of providing a play-by-play of the progression of measles in granular detail."
www.niemanlab.org
February 14, 2026 at 6:17 PM
immediately texting the second one to all my kat friends
February 14, 2026 at 6:12 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
Oh, she just hand writes funny things on motions all the time.

One of my favorites in one of my cases:
February 14, 2026 at 5:59 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
As a person who grew up in Louisiana: this can't be stressed enough.
Correct. Nothing makes you hate these people more than living among them.
February 14, 2026 at 5:00 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
I clerked for one of McMahon’s judge pals and let me tell you, this judge, who is one of the most restrained jurists I’ve encountered in over a decade of litigating, not only has steam coming out of her ears, but her ears are fire engine red and are whistling like a kettle. Goddamn.
hi, judge expert here, judges only do this when they're in extreme distress!
storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
February 14, 2026 at 3:53 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
When I clerked, my chambers were right around the corner from Judge McMahon's and she was friends with my judge. This is extraordinarily out of character for her. It's emblematic of how bad the situation is with the government flagrantly abusing the judicial process and ignoring court authority.
hi, judge expert here, judges only do this when they're in extreme distress!
storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
February 14, 2026 at 3:14 PM
Reposted by Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq.
February 14, 2026 at 2:11 PM