Jimmer Cork-Bottle
@jimmerthatisall.bsky.social
From the twelve-winded sky. Profile pic 1972.
Discord: jimmerthatisall
My posts:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2satfah44msc3khoojnhrvuj/feed/aaab3adsokgse
Discord: jimmerthatisall
My posts:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2satfah44msc3khoojnhrvuj/feed/aaab3adsokgse
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
i dated a girl like that once
November 15, 2025 at 2:11 AM
i dated a girl like that once
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
[restaurant]
ME: I’m meeting my blind date here.
HOSTESS: Do you have reservations?
ME: Yes, but my friend tells me she’s very nice.
ME: I’m meeting my blind date here.
HOSTESS: Do you have reservations?
ME: Yes, but my friend tells me she’s very nice.
November 14, 2025 at 9:08 PM
[restaurant]
ME: I’m meeting my blind date here.
HOSTESS: Do you have reservations?
ME: Yes, but my friend tells me she’s very nice.
ME: I’m meeting my blind date here.
HOSTESS: Do you have reservations?
ME: Yes, but my friend tells me she’s very nice.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
This day in history. 1990. David Bowie opened on Broadway in an all-singing all-dancing "Elephant Man" featuring the show-stopping hit "Twunk Full of Twinkle".
November 15, 2023 at 10:29 AM
This day in history. 1990. David Bowie opened on Broadway in an all-singing all-dancing "Elephant Man" featuring the show-stopping hit "Twunk Full of Twinkle".
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
can we still say shooting the breeze is that ok or
November 12, 2025 at 8:47 PM
can we still say shooting the breeze is that ok or
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
That thing you want to do... Do it, twice.
November 13, 2025 at 7:36 PM
That thing you want to do... Do it, twice.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
LinkedIn is a social media account for that dreadful actor you play at work. Fuck that guy.
November 13, 2025 at 10:28 PM
LinkedIn is a social media account for that dreadful actor you play at work. Fuck that guy.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
I’ve decided to give in to “gluttony” and “sloth” because I’m an overachiever
November 14, 2025 at 3:38 PM
I’ve decided to give in to “gluttony” and “sloth” because I’m an overachiever
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
Passing out copies of my posts to the patients in this hospital so that I might go viral
November 14, 2025 at 3:24 PM
Passing out copies of my posts to the patients in this hospital so that I might go viral
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
THAT CRUMPLED MCDONALD'S BAG CAME WITH THE CAR!
November 13, 2025 at 9:13 PM
THAT CRUMPLED MCDONALD'S BAG CAME WITH THE CAR!
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
sitting in an Amazon box so my cats will think I’m sooooo precious
November 11, 2025 at 2:10 PM
sitting in an Amazon box so my cats will think I’m sooooo precious
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
I am physically unable to go through a yellow light without saying "ha ha haa" in a menacing voice
November 14, 2025 at 1:06 PM
I am physically unable to go through a yellow light without saying "ha ha haa" in a menacing voice
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
Sorry I need a large scale internet outage to get off
November 13, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Sorry I need a large scale internet outage to get off
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
I’m watching dune related entertainment so I’m gonna be unavailable for about the next 147.3 days.
November 11, 2025 at 9:25 PM
I’m watching dune related entertainment so I’m gonna be unavailable for about the next 147.3 days.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
On p23 of the new Bluesky ToS, it says all users are obliged to panic-post at least three (3) times a day.
November 13, 2025 at 6:03 AM
On p23 of the new Bluesky ToS, it says all users are obliged to panic-post at least three (3) times a day.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
If someone tells you you’re too sensitive
Run
Run
November 14, 2025 at 7:34 AM
If someone tells you you’re too sensitive
Run
Run
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
Them: Want to come out with us
Me: no
I feel very uncomfortable around normal
It makes me itchy
Me: no
I feel very uncomfortable around normal
It makes me itchy
November 14, 2025 at 7:16 AM
Them: Want to come out with us
Me: no
I feel very uncomfortable around normal
It makes me itchy
Me: no
I feel very uncomfortable around normal
It makes me itchy
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
i have a favorite mailbox. hi! im 90 years old in this post
November 13, 2025 at 9:12 PM
i have a favorite mailbox. hi! im 90 years old in this post
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
I leave words out to see who’s paying attention.
November 12, 2025 at 10:21 PM
I leave words out to see who’s paying attention.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
The beatings will continue until I'm tired of beating you.
-me, playing Scrabble
-me, playing Scrabble
November 13, 2025 at 2:41 PM
The beatings will continue until I'm tired of beating you.
-me, playing Scrabble
-me, playing Scrabble
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
I bet a factory reset would fix me
November 12, 2025 at 9:14 PM
I bet a factory reset would fix me
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
You wouldn't think chucking 9 minicans of Coke from the airport lounge into your backpack is gonna weight that much but it's important to learn a new thing each day
November 14, 2025 at 2:03 AM
You wouldn't think chucking 9 minicans of Coke from the airport lounge into your backpack is gonna weight that much but it's important to learn a new thing each day
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
(Me, doing anything requiring all of my concentration)
My bladder: SIR HAVE ANOTHER URGENT MESSAGE.
My bladder: SIR HAVE ANOTHER URGENT MESSAGE.
November 14, 2025 at 1:03 AM
(Me, doing anything requiring all of my concentration)
My bladder: SIR HAVE ANOTHER URGENT MESSAGE.
My bladder: SIR HAVE ANOTHER URGENT MESSAGE.
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
[watching murder documentary]
Her: That’s not how I would have done it.
Me: *never sleeps again*
Her: That’s not how I would have done it.
Me: *never sleeps again*
November 13, 2025 at 11:45 PM
[watching murder documentary]
Her: That’s not how I would have done it.
Me: *never sleeps again*
Her: That’s not how I would have done it.
Me: *never sleeps again*
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
live every moment as if it’s your last
November 14, 2025 at 4:26 PM
live every moment as if it’s your last
Reposted by Jimmer Cork-Bottle
brb need to find a sharpie
November 14, 2025 at 2:06 PM
brb need to find a sharpie