Dominic Caruso
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dominiccaruso1.bsky.social
Dominic Caruso
@dominiccaruso1.bsky.social
I was a snowball in hell.
[he/his]
Pinned
We should flip a pancake directly into space
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Going to the mall and putting a potato in the pocket of every dress.
November 22, 2025 at 11:55 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
babe, listen, I need you to bring me $15,000 cash and my passport. I out-pizza’d the hut and they are after me
November 22, 2025 at 1:26 AM
Sure I have a morning ritual: boil water, get my old mug from the cupboard, steep a little bag of black tea, take in the steam, fall into a tiny bubble, voices murmuring, cosmos, disappearance.
November 22, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
If you bring your fancy peanut butter to the Home Depot paint dept they have to mix it for you
November 22, 2025 at 2:55 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
cream of telephone. "the dialing-ointment"
November 22, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Most hurtful way to be insulted is when somebody makes up a mean rhyme about your name. Not only is that the name that my own mother gave me, but you're desecrating it using the weapons of a poet!?
November 21, 2025 at 9:08 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
I’m fun. I also can’t sit in a house if the kitchen island is too big.
November 22, 2025 at 2:44 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
The ideal social media site would only allow photos of animals, lunches and craft projects, and the only comments you're allowed to make are 'Hello', 'Very cool' and 'We are friends'
November 22, 2025 at 1:46 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Broken branch is a hell of a thing to really identify with. So you're just like, reaching out to be an integral part of the biological process and suddenly your spirit is heavy well shit, twig. You crunched is it a ghost
November 22, 2025 at 5:39 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
[squints, in a raspy voice]

Some of us grew up in ballet. We know the taste of coffee followed by a Diet Pepsi followed by a Clif bar.

[coyote howls]
November 20, 2025 at 9:50 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Take off your knit cap & your hair hurts season.
November 21, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
it pains me to have to admit this to everyone, but when a lightbulb appears above my head, it’s not because i have a bright idea; i am just thinking about a lightbulb
January 25, 2025 at 11:02 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
farm to table doesn't impress me. let my food go on a journey. let it see the world
October 17, 2025 at 11:26 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Well, I finally gave in and bought a feral mountain lion for my home office. Honestly I'm not sure what all the fuss is about, it's actually been a huge inconvenience
November 21, 2025 at 12:29 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
showers of gore
November 21, 2025 at 1:47 AM
I caught some giants playing checkers with all the manhole covers in my neighborhood this morning
November 21, 2025 at 4:24 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
taylor swift should write a song about when your sleeves keep rolling down every time you wash the dishes
November 21, 2025 at 3:25 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Outer space is mostly feelings and that's why we tend to hide our footage and say the burrow owl has landed when anyone opens up in a newsreel voice
November 20, 2025 at 6:01 AM
Getting a new tattoo that is nothing more than a description of the materiality of the tattoo itself: date, time, duration of the tattoo process, ink color, size & location of the tattoo on my person, typeface used, name of the artist, grid coordinates of the tattoo shop, all the cool stuff
November 20, 2025 at 5:38 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
“makes my blood boil”: old, boring, visually unapplealing

“makes my blood broil”: new, exciting, set it and forget it probably
November 20, 2025 at 1:47 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Nearly killed in a crosswalk by Lowly Worm doing 490 km/h in a Bugatti apple
November 20, 2025 at 2:11 AM
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If you spell your name Corrie or if you spell it Corey, I want you to know that I say them differently. You won’t be able to hear it with your ear, but I am saying them differently. 
November 20, 2025 at 2:42 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
When my friends and I were alcoholic 25yos, chain-smoking and drinking steel reserve on our band-house porch, giving each other homosocial haircuts, smoking weed and watching Wim Wenders movies all day, there was no one who's approval we valued more than the morally ambiguous forest-witch Baba Yaga.
November 19, 2025 at 12:41 AM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
Asking the waiter for one of their largest decomposing vegetables then impressing my date with how quickly I break it down with my superior enzymes
November 19, 2025 at 9:09 PM
Reposted by Dominic Caruso
i don’t think asking a delivery person to brush your hair is weird but maybe that’s just me
November 19, 2025 at 10:07 PM