An upside-down umbrella is a great way to transport a large quantity of scrambled eggs in an emergency
November 29, 2025 at 11:35 PM
An upside-down umbrella is a great way to transport a large quantity of scrambled eggs in an emergency
Reposted by mindflakes
we're building an effigy of you in the town square but don't worry there's nothing nefarious about it
November 29, 2025 at 7:26 PM
we're building an effigy of you in the town square but don't worry there's nothing nefarious about it
Reposted by mindflakes
i'm not convinced by your lived experience actually. i just don't think it would have went down like that
November 29, 2025 at 4:22 PM
i'm not convinced by your lived experience actually. i just don't think it would have went down like that
90% of situations would benefit from having a cord you could pull to deploy an inflatable emergency slide like on an airplane
November 29, 2025 at 7:46 PM
90% of situations would benefit from having a cord you could pull to deploy an inflatable emergency slide like on an airplane
Reposted by mindflakes
A log in the mud is like church for bugs
November 28, 2025 at 11:09 AM
A log in the mud is like church for bugs
Reposted by mindflakes
I put my pants on like everyone else. first I slather my legs with mayonnaise
November 28, 2025 at 6:48 AM
I put my pants on like everyone else. first I slather my legs with mayonnaise
Reposted by mindflakes
"observe" is one of the most powerful commands that can be issued
November 27, 2025 at 9:46 PM
"observe" is one of the most powerful commands that can be issued
Reposted by mindflakes
i'm way better than all of the dogs in the dog show. i can ride a bike, i can cook meals, and i'm very familiar with computers. i can do all kinds of things that they will never be able to do
November 27, 2025 at 5:09 PM
i'm way better than all of the dogs in the dog show. i can ride a bike, i can cook meals, and i'm very familiar with computers. i can do all kinds of things that they will never be able to do
Reposted by mindflakes
Check out vowels if you need to make a sound
November 26, 2025 at 3:10 AM
Check out vowels if you need to make a sound
Reposted by mindflakes
traditional color theory posits that red, yellow, and blue are the primary colors from which all other colors are derived. in global culinary theory, however, sauces tend to align around red, yellow, or green. this suggests that blue sauces, or the absence thereof, are the last creative frontier
November 28, 2025 at 12:34 PM
traditional color theory posits that red, yellow, and blue are the primary colors from which all other colors are derived. in global culinary theory, however, sauces tend to align around red, yellow, or green. this suggests that blue sauces, or the absence thereof, are the last creative frontier
Using my mouse cursor to pet a jpeg of a dog
November 28, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Using my mouse cursor to pet a jpeg of a dog
Reposted by mindflakes
was drifting off to sleep but I suddenly imagined the world's largest bee and scared myself awake. Luckily I am able to resume my slumber once I think of an even larger bee but this one's on my side
November 27, 2025 at 8:10 PM
was drifting off to sleep but I suddenly imagined the world's largest bee and scared myself awake. Luckily I am able to resume my slumber once I think of an even larger bee but this one's on my side
Reposted by mindflakes
The doctor says I have the most monstrous eyes he’s ever seen. Pools of dormant rage he said
July 19, 2023 at 9:58 PM
The doctor says I have the most monstrous eyes he’s ever seen. Pools of dormant rage he said
Reposted by mindflakes
Everyone’s like “listen to your body, listen to your body.” Honestly, I don’t think my body needs as much mustard as it requests.
November 27, 2025 at 5:31 AM
Everyone’s like “listen to your body, listen to your body.” Honestly, I don’t think my body needs as much mustard as it requests.
Reposted by mindflakes
there comes a moment about five minutes after encountering a lost dog when you stop actively looking for a panicked owner and start to imagine a life with the dog. which makes the owner’s eventual appearance pretty bittersweet
November 27, 2025 at 3:10 AM
there comes a moment about five minutes after encountering a lost dog when you stop actively looking for a panicked owner and start to imagine a life with the dog. which makes the owner’s eventual appearance pretty bittersweet
Kids today are always on their phones instead of solving the ancient riddle of the pharaoh
November 28, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Kids today are always on their phones instead of solving the ancient riddle of the pharaoh
Reposted by mindflakes
i wish i could physically experience the inside of a lava lamp
November 26, 2025 at 11:12 PM
i wish i could physically experience the inside of a lava lamp
Reposted by mindflakes
look around your room. see how many cups you have that you haven't brought back to the kitchen. what does this mean? that's right: you don't have nearly enough cups. go get more cups.
November 26, 2025 at 9:04 PM
look around your room. see how many cups you have that you haven't brought back to the kitchen. what does this mean? that's right: you don't have nearly enough cups. go get more cups.
Reposted by mindflakes
Any time you say goodbye to someone, it's important to tell them to "take care", because otherwise they'll probably forget to do that.
November 26, 2025 at 12:51 PM
Any time you say goodbye to someone, it's important to tell them to "take care", because otherwise they'll probably forget to do that.
Reposted by mindflakes
filling my water bottle from the fish tank before leaving the restaurant
November 26, 2025 at 5:05 AM
filling my water bottle from the fish tank before leaving the restaurant
Reposted by mindflakes
The best thing about having a cat is when he’ll walk in the room carrying a slice of ham but you don’t have any ham in the house. Where’d you get the ham little guy?
November 25, 2025 at 7:45 PM
The best thing about having a cat is when he’ll walk in the room carrying a slice of ham but you don’t have any ham in the house. Where’d you get the ham little guy?
You can't have soup without freshly-baked bread. Of course you'll need to bake the bread yourself. And you'll need to grow the wheat to make the bread. And you'll need to compost the soil to grow the wheat. So step 1 to making soup is to buy 300 worms
November 26, 2025 at 2:35 PM
You can't have soup without freshly-baked bread. Of course you'll need to bake the bread yourself. And you'll need to grow the wheat to make the bread. And you'll need to compost the soil to grow the wheat. So step 1 to making soup is to buy 300 worms
Reposted by mindflakes
You have to separate the cheese from the cheesemonger
November 25, 2025 at 2:47 AM
You have to separate the cheese from the cheesemonger
Reposted by mindflakes
a corgi is an enchanted loaf of bread
November 25, 2025 at 2:48 AM
a corgi is an enchanted loaf of bread
Here's my ranking of the numbers 1 and 2 in reverse numerical order:
1: 2
2: 1
1: 2
2: 1
November 25, 2025 at 9:41 PM
Here's my ranking of the numbers 1 and 2 in reverse numerical order:
1: 2
2: 1
1: 2
2: 1