count stefancula 🦇
@stefanthinks.bsky.social
Joke attempter. Mildly annoying. Occasionally humorous.
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
ME: i just saw a girl sitting on a tuffet eating curds
WIFE: no way
ME: no just curds
WIFE: no way
ME: no just curds
November 18, 2025 at 4:26 PM
ME: i just saw a girl sitting on a tuffet eating curds
WIFE: no way
ME: no just curds
WIFE: no way
ME: no just curds
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
a horse walks into a bar
BARTENDER: *points* horse!
BARTENDER: *points* horse!
November 19, 2025 at 12:08 AM
a horse walks into a bar
BARTENDER: *points* horse!
BARTENDER: *points* horse!
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
poison or poidaughter; it's a poigender reveal
November 19, 2025 at 8:48 PM
poison or poidaughter; it's a poigender reveal
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
These rivers and lakes that I'm used to are fine but what if the water was falling? Could be interesting
November 19, 2025 at 8:58 PM
These rivers and lakes that I'm used to are fine but what if the water was falling? Could be interesting
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
heating pads that are people sized and shaped for the even distribution of heat and pressure
November 19, 2025 at 7:52 PM
heating pads that are people sized and shaped for the even distribution of heat and pressure
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
When I arrive at the party
November 19, 2025 at 5:53 AM
When I arrive at the party
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
Cuteness overload warning!
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
November 19, 2025 at 5:52 AM
Cuteness overload warning!
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
IN THIS ESSAY I WILL: demonstrate, with 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘣𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 analysis, that Blockbuster’s 2010 bankruptcy and the closure of its 2K stores constituted an act of structural homophobia.
One must recognize Blockbuster not merely as a rental chain, but as a liminal lesbian threshold-space,
(1/42069)
One must recognize Blockbuster not merely as a rental chain, but as a liminal lesbian threshold-space,
(1/42069)
November 19, 2025 at 4:58 PM
IN THIS ESSAY I WILL: demonstrate, with 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘣𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 analysis, that Blockbuster’s 2010 bankruptcy and the closure of its 2K stores constituted an act of structural homophobia.
One must recognize Blockbuster not merely as a rental chain, but as a liminal lesbian threshold-space,
(1/42069)
One must recognize Blockbuster not merely as a rental chain, but as a liminal lesbian threshold-space,
(1/42069)
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
Thank you for pre-numbering your skeet thread so I can already determine it's too long and I ain't reading it.
November 18, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Thank you for pre-numbering your skeet thread so I can already determine it's too long and I ain't reading it.
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
you want to know what i’m thinking? there are some things i can’t hide? well, if you don’t know what i’m thinking, i would say there ARE some things i CAN hide.
November 19, 2025 at 2:22 AM
you want to know what i’m thinking? there are some things i can’t hide? well, if you don’t know what i’m thinking, i would say there ARE some things i CAN hide.
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
I'm no "hero." I'm just a guy who parks completely within the lines they paint on parking lots.
November 19, 2025 at 3:21 PM
I'm no "hero." I'm just a guy who parks completely within the lines they paint on parking lots.
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
i thought i was ready to buy a new pair of slippers but then i got cold feet
November 19, 2025 at 2:07 PM
i thought i was ready to buy a new pair of slippers but then i got cold feet
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
Me at work: “All of this is fake and made up. Not we all just wearing masks and pretending to care.”
November 19, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Me at work: “All of this is fake and made up. Not we all just wearing masks and pretending to care.”
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
clarrissa did explain this actually
November 17, 2025 at 10:58 PM
clarrissa did explain this actually
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
first date idea: I eat a rotisserie chicken and you're in your home, eating your own rotisserie chicken
November 17, 2025 at 10:24 PM
first date idea: I eat a rotisserie chicken and you're in your home, eating your own rotisserie chicken
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
[grandma voice] I'm just going to rest my eyes for a bit
November 17, 2025 at 8:43 PM
[grandma voice] I'm just going to rest my eyes for a bit
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
I need the cha-ching sound effect of a cash register bell every time I buy anything online so I remember I am spending real money
February 3, 2024 at 2:49 PM
I need the cha-ching sound effect of a cash register bell every time I buy anything online so I remember I am spending real money
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
jesus was the first om-nepo-tent baby
November 19, 2025 at 2:11 PM
jesus was the first om-nepo-tent baby
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
yes, i’m still extremely hot to those of you who may be wondering
November 18, 2025 at 10:19 PM
yes, i’m still extremely hot to those of you who may be wondering
Cuteness overload warning!
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
November 19, 2025 at 5:52 AM
Cuteness overload warning!
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
I took my kids to the animal shelter for the first time. We were walking around, and the two-year-old was saying stuff like, 'Cats go meow,' and, 'That cat sees me.' Then, as soon as his eyes met with this kitten’s, he just blurted out, 'Hello, I love you.'
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
Yay I got a treadmill (Oh no I fell off a treadmill).
November 19, 2025 at 5:12 AM
Yay I got a treadmill (Oh no I fell off a treadmill).
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
THE INVENTOR OF BAD NEWS: what if you could be sitting down
November 14, 2025 at 9:35 PM
THE INVENTOR OF BAD NEWS: what if you could be sitting down
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
1000 words for misuse of "effecting"
November 18, 2025 at 4:21 PM
1000 words for misuse of "effecting"
Reposted by count stefancula 🦇
sure sex is great but did you ever disable quote posts
November 15, 2025 at 1:07 PM
sure sex is great but did you ever disable quote posts