ThePatrick (Patrick Coffman)
hatoriki.bsky.social
ThePatrick (Patrick Coffman)
@hatoriki.bsky.social
Hey there, I'm still ThePatrick who wrote stupid guides on GameFAQs eons ago

I'm a mailman now, so I'm just tired all the time

日本語が分かんないから~という海外の龍が如くファン為に攻略を作造ということで何時間も無駄にした安保な親父です~

宜しくお願いしま~す
Pinned
"It's-a me!!! Mike Yanagita!"

"Dear Mike

Please don't come to the castle.
Why don't you sit over there? I prefer that.

--Princess Toadstool *PEACH!*"
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Securicats Direct
January 21, 2026 at 9:23 AM
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The phrase “arrested four children” is so gut-churningly evil
"School district officials in Columbia Heights, Minnesota, say their sense of security is shaken and their hearts shattered after four students from the district have recently been taken by officers with Immigration and Customs Enforcement."
ICE has arrested four children in same Minnesota school district
School district officials in Columbia Heights, Minnesota, say their sense of security is shaken and their hearts shattered after four students from the district have recently been taken by officers wi...
www.cbsnews.com
January 22, 2026 at 12:41 AM
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I can’t post this on main but
January 21, 2026 at 10:28 PM
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going through an old folder and found what has got to be the dumbest thing i ever made
January 21, 2026 at 7:01 PM
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There’s an FMV intro for The Ninja Warriors on Sega CD and it’s completely nuts and half of it is a music video of Zuntata playing “Daddy Mulk” and its cyberpunk as shit youtu.be/zUpJVxETRSY?...
The Ninja Warriors - Prologue - Mega CD (Japan)
YouTube video by GMIX6809
youtu.be
January 20, 2026 at 2:51 PM
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Gamedevs: Discord is a terrible communication tool! Gimme an email address I can reach you on! D:
January 21, 2026 at 5:20 AM
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still one of my favorite tweets
January 19, 2026 at 9:43 AM
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thank you
4. There is no need to make pickles default on a fried chicken sandwich. Just let me enjoy the fried chicken without that slimy, briny junk
January 21, 2026 at 12:05 AM
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They need all protestors to be paid operatives because they cannot abide the possibility that somewhere in the world, people sincerely believe in standing up for others. It isn’t enough that they’ve chased all moral virtue from their own hearts. They want a world where no virtue exists in anyone.
Trump on Renee Good: "When she was shot, there was another woman that was screaming 'Shame. Shame Shame Shame.' So loud. Like a professional opera singer. She was so loud. And so professional. She wasn't a woman that was hurt like, 'Oh my heart is injured.' She was a professional."
January 21, 2026 at 12:44 AM
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cool name why’s it called that
January 19, 2026 at 2:25 PM
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January 20, 2026 at 3:30 AM
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the Deadly Towers manual has some absolute gems for item descriptions
January 20, 2026 at 4:48 AM
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can someone photoshop the screaming cowboy guy in here
why does she look like a force ghost. shouldn't that be charlie
Make Heaven Crowded is an insane title.
January 20, 2026 at 5:06 AM
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Farmers love to act like they have no idea who’s responsible for their problems, like this guy speculating it must be some Washington functionary because he loves everything Trump does. He can’t bring himself to tell the truth because he loves white supremacy more than his own financial success.
I usually try to eschew elitism in all forms, but enough is enough. These people are dumb fucking yokels. They live in a completely different reality than I do, and I don’t want to share a country with them any longer.
January 20, 2026 at 4:35 AM
Just can't get over this song man

Been bopping around my head for weeks again

youtu.be/N_MqfF0WBsU?...
January 20, 2026 at 4:21 AM
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“But what deeply troubles me now is that for all the steps we've taken toward integration, I've come to believe that we are integrating into a burning house." 

Dr. King said this famous quote on March 27th, 1968, mere days before his murder. But the context around the quote is interesting...
January 20, 2026 at 3:40 AM
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He was a Communist, Elmo.
January 19, 2026 at 9:59 PM
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Erika is just trying to get closure quickly and move on from the horribly tragic death of what’s-his-name
January 19, 2026 at 10:18 PM
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January 19, 2026 at 10:20 PM
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This is what they said about him then. This is what they say about us now. This is who they always have been.
January 19, 2026 at 6:09 PM
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This is such a foolproof premise for a game that I don’t know why we haven’t gotten one a year for the last 30 years. They wear little helmets and you chase them around.
January 19, 2026 at 10:41 PM
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scully you're not gonna believe this
January 19, 2026 at 9:17 PM
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My dentist can do it all, from a simple cleaning to identifying my charred remains
January 19, 2026 at 4:32 AM
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Clorox coming out with a bold "huff bleach" ad campaign
January 18, 2026 at 6:57 PM
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“verbal assaults,” heh you fucking babies.

any of you goons been shot four times in the face while unarmed, then VERBALLY ASSAULTED with “fucking bitch” as you die with your horrified wife next to you because your murderers also denied you medical care?

anything like that? speak up!
January 18, 2026 at 10:48 PM