chris balser 🖤
@doomfunk.bsky.social
systems designer. artist. writer. doer of silly voices. salmiakki advocate. worked on ESO, Starfield, Diablo 4, Cyberpunk 2.
Pinned
chris balser 🖤
@doomfunk.bsky.social
· Jul 5
Hi, I'm Chris! And I'm currently out of work and seeking employment. I am a career game designer, having done primarily RPG systems work but also quest/narrative and combat/encounter content. I am also a visual artist, writer, and voice actor. If you could use someone like me, hit my DMs.
poison swamp. already got one? make it ten
November 11, 2025 at 7:06 PM
poison swamp. already got one? make it ten
I'm liminally performant. I do not impact the client in any meaningful way as long as I'm not near the crosshair.
I'm liminally performative: maybe THIS is the post that will go viral. Maybe not?
I'm performatively liminal, which means I'm standing on a cliff going "OOOOH MAYBE I'LL JUMP, MAYBE I'M A REPRESENTATION OF CROSSING A THRESHOLD THAT CANNOT BE UNCROSSED, OOOOOOH"
November 10, 2025 at 10:20 PM
I'm liminally performant. I do not impact the client in any meaningful way as long as I'm not near the crosshair.
okay Mr. Laurence Fishburne as Emiel Regis is some incredible casting, costuming, and delivery. he's a delight. I love Regis, always have, and Fishburne is just captivating in the role.
November 10, 2025 at 8:35 PM
okay Mr. Laurence Fishburne as Emiel Regis is some incredible casting, costuming, and delivery. he's a delight. I love Regis, always have, and Fishburne is just captivating in the role.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
Sorry one more
November 9, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Sorry one more
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
also if you guys enjoyed gdt’s frankenstein please watch crimson peak. one of his best movies that got absolutely slept on bc there was like no marketing.
November 7, 2025 at 7:12 PM
also if you guys enjoyed gdt’s frankenstein please watch crimson peak. one of his best movies that got absolutely slept on bc there was like no marketing.
I know this is making waves but these exact requirements were expectations in a training video I was shown when I was hired at target a long, long time ago. they've always wanted the team to be like this.
"Store employees are now required to smile if they are within 10 feet of a shopper.
They also must make eye contact with and wave to or greet the customer.
If they’re within four feet, the employee should ask how the customer’s day is going or if they need help."
🙄 Won't stop the boycott, y'all.
They also must make eye contact with and wave to or greet the customer.
If they’re within four feet, the employee should ask how the customer’s day is going or if they need help."
🙄 Won't stop the boycott, y'all.
Target is now requiring its employees to smile more
As the holiday season fast approaches, Target is urging its employees to add a little more “jolly” to their work routine.
www.wilx.com
November 8, 2025 at 8:45 PM
I know this is making waves but these exact requirements were expectations in a training video I was shown when I was hired at target a long, long time ago. they've always wanted the team to be like this.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
warner brothers trickster figures explained
November 8, 2025 at 3:23 AM
warner brothers trickster figures explained
sipping my tea, staring out a window,
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
November 8, 2025 at 4:17 PM
sipping my tea, staring out a window,
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
oh shit
Hey, do you like violent video games? Because the alpha demo playtest of MÖRK BORG Heresy Supreme is now LIVE on Steam.
store.steampowered.com/app/3216800/...
store.steampowered.com/app/3216800/...
MÖRK BORG Heresy Supreme on Steam
MÖRK BORG Heresy Supreme is a doom-metal action RPG set in the world of MÖRK BORG. Wretched antiheroes explore a side-scrolling, semi-procedural grimdark fantasy world, searching for a way to prevent ...
store.steampowered.com
November 6, 2025 at 2:13 PM
oh shit
no matter what lexa says about the game it's great. strong rec from me
fucking uuugh the game is on fucking sale I have no energy to promote it anymore it's more than a year old it should be taken for a walk behind a shed and shot in the back of its fucking head please retweet
November 6, 2025 at 1:58 PM
no matter what lexa says about the game it's great. strong rec from me
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
TWO WEEKS UNTIL DEMONSCHOOL
November 5, 2025 at 5:59 PM
TWO WEEKS UNTIL DEMONSCHOOL
step 1: start a pot of water, a bit of salt, and a bit of oil boiling. once it rolls add your rice, reduce, cover til moist and fluffy. usually 1.5 cups water to 1 cup rice for the jasmine rice I buy.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
IT IS TIME FOR BLUESKY RECIPE POSTING
do you have a cheap, healthy, low-cost recipe? post it here! or quote tweet this post. or dunk on me for something I don't care just post easy meals that people can make right now.
do you have a cheap, healthy, low-cost recipe? post it here! or quote tweet this post. or dunk on me for something I don't care just post easy meals that people can make right now.
November 4, 2025 at 3:11 AM
step 1: start a pot of water, a bit of salt, and a bit of oil boiling. once it rolls add your rice, reduce, cover til moist and fluffy. usually 1.5 cups water to 1 cup rice for the jasmine rice I buy.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
I've offhandedly mentioned this elsewhere but my first exposure to John Cleese was the Schweppes ads on the VHS releases of James Bond movies and when I finally got into Monty Python I had a big "oh I see" about him.
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
I think everybody has a “Wallace Shawn from Young Sheldon” — my first one would probably be “Vincent Price, the guy who did the voice of Ratigan in The Great Mouse Detective”
November 3, 2025 at 9:07 PM
I've offhandedly mentioned this elsewhere but my first exposure to John Cleese was the Schweppes ads on the VHS releases of James Bond movies and when I finally got into Monty Python I had a big "oh I see" about him.
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
You left. Now they're dead.
Immersive sim narrative first person cleaner AMBROSIA SKY is coming out NEXT WEEK!
"beautiful, intimate, and deeply affecting" - @ign.com
"equal parts System Shock and Powerwash Simulator" -
@pcgamer.com
Steam & Epic, November 10, 9am EST. Links below!
Immersive sim narrative first person cleaner AMBROSIA SKY is coming out NEXT WEEK!
"beautiful, intimate, and deeply affecting" - @ign.com
"equal parts System Shock and Powerwash Simulator" -
@pcgamer.com
Steam & Epic, November 10, 9am EST. Links below!
October 31, 2025 at 6:49 PM
You left. Now they're dead.
Immersive sim narrative first person cleaner AMBROSIA SKY is coming out NEXT WEEK!
"beautiful, intimate, and deeply affecting" - @ign.com
"equal parts System Shock and Powerwash Simulator" -
@pcgamer.com
Steam & Epic, November 10, 9am EST. Links below!
Immersive sim narrative first person cleaner AMBROSIA SKY is coming out NEXT WEEK!
"beautiful, intimate, and deeply affecting" - @ign.com
"equal parts System Shock and Powerwash Simulator" -
@pcgamer.com
Steam & Epic, November 10, 9am EST. Links below!
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
okay, update: i have had this question answered, and I am now looking to speak to game QA testers ON the record about the weirdest, silliest-sounding things they've had to do to make sure games work. the wackier the better. happy to keep folks anon if they prefer. DMs open, email/Signal in bio
would anyone who works in or adjacent to game testing/QA be willing to answer a couple questions for me? off the record, not to be quoted - just need some background info on automations to know whether a scenario someone described in a talk is common or unusual.
October 31, 2025 at 3:57 PM
okay, update: i have had this question answered, and I am now looking to speak to game QA testers ON the record about the weirdest, silliest-sounding things they've had to do to make sure games work. the wackier the better. happy to keep folks anon if they prefer. DMs open, email/Signal in bio
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
It's too long for Bluesky & I refuse to compromise. So here's a screenshot with the words in the alt-text.
October 30, 2025 at 6:27 PM
It's too long for Bluesky & I refuse to compromise. So here's a screenshot with the words in the alt-text.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
Here’s some extra info straight from the studio lead 👌
October 30, 2025 at 5:53 PM
Here’s some extra info straight from the studio lead 👌
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
This will be a long thread on yesterday police massacre in Rio.
In nothern Rio de Janeiro city, there is a couple of hills called Complexo da Penha. It's Comando Vermelho("Red Command", a drug gang), or CV, territory.
CV is the greatest gang in Rio, second in the whole Brazil.
+
In nothern Rio de Janeiro city, there is a couple of hills called Complexo da Penha. It's Comando Vermelho("Red Command", a drug gang), or CV, territory.
CV is the greatest gang in Rio, second in the whole Brazil.
+
🧵 Awful awful massacre in Brazil
Gente, é o maior massacre no Brasil desde o Araguaia. Entendo quem quer puxar pra Canudos ou Contestado ou etc, mas não podemos livrar a ditadura de 64 só porque ela escondia melhor seus corpos.
Morreram 41 guerrilheiros comunistas e mais de 1200 camponeses no Araguaia.
Morreram 41 guerrilheiros comunistas e mais de 1200 camponeses no Araguaia.
October 29, 2025 at 11:52 PM
This will be a long thread on yesterday police massacre in Rio.
In nothern Rio de Janeiro city, there is a couple of hills called Complexo da Penha. It's Comando Vermelho("Red Command", a drug gang), or CV, territory.
CV is the greatest gang in Rio, second in the whole Brazil.
+
In nothern Rio de Janeiro city, there is a couple of hills called Complexo da Penha. It's Comando Vermelho("Red Command", a drug gang), or CV, territory.
CV is the greatest gang in Rio, second in the whole Brazil.
+
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
I I / I / I I / I — Project Ark demo
It's spooky season, what better time if you would do me a kindness and check out this demo of my narrative experience for SEGA MegaDrive/Genesis that I intend to be part of a point+click stranding adventure type game—
www.aeriform.io/0232a57db92c...
It's spooky season, what better time if you would do me a kindness and check out this demo of my narrative experience for SEGA MegaDrive/Genesis that I intend to be part of a point+click stranding adventure type game—
www.aeriform.io/0232a57db92c...
October 4, 2025 at 5:14 PM
I I / I / I I / I — Project Ark demo
It's spooky season, what better time if you would do me a kindness and check out this demo of my narrative experience for SEGA MegaDrive/Genesis that I intend to be part of a point+click stranding adventure type game—
www.aeriform.io/0232a57db92c...
It's spooky season, what better time if you would do me a kindness and check out this demo of my narrative experience for SEGA MegaDrive/Genesis that I intend to be part of a point+click stranding adventure type game—
www.aeriform.io/0232a57db92c...
🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️ ...mmmmmanifesting... 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️
🕯️🕯️🕯️ Manifesting? 🕯️🕯️🕯️
🕯️🕯️ Manifesting... 🕯️🕯️
October 28, 2025 at 8:09 PM
🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️ ...mmmmmanifesting... 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
43 years ago today, readers the world over opened their newspapers and gazed upon cow tools for the first time. happy birthday cow tools. you look great.
October 28, 2025 at 12:23 PM
43 years ago today, readers the world over opened their newspapers and gazed upon cow tools for the first time. happy birthday cow tools. you look great.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
Is YOUR child obsessed with FF Tactics? Know the signs:
BRB: Boosting Ramza’s Bravery
SMH: Squire Must Heal
STFU: Stone Throw Far Underpowered
LMAO: Letting My Archer Overshoot
SMD: Summoner Might Die
IDC: I’m Dismissing Chocobos
IDK: Idiotic Dark Knight
IDGAF: I Don’t Grant Argath Forgiveness
BRB: Boosting Ramza’s Bravery
SMH: Squire Must Heal
STFU: Stone Throw Far Underpowered
LMAO: Letting My Archer Overshoot
SMD: Summoner Might Die
IDC: I’m Dismissing Chocobos
IDK: Idiotic Dark Knight
IDGAF: I Don’t Grant Argath Forgiveness
September 11, 2025 at 5:07 AM
Is YOUR child obsessed with FF Tactics? Know the signs:
BRB: Boosting Ramza’s Bravery
SMH: Squire Must Heal
STFU: Stone Throw Far Underpowered
LMAO: Letting My Archer Overshoot
SMD: Summoner Might Die
IDC: I’m Dismissing Chocobos
IDK: Idiotic Dark Knight
IDGAF: I Don’t Grant Argath Forgiveness
BRB: Boosting Ramza’s Bravery
SMH: Squire Must Heal
STFU: Stone Throw Far Underpowered
LMAO: Letting My Archer Overshoot
SMD: Summoner Might Die
IDC: I’m Dismissing Chocobos
IDK: Idiotic Dark Knight
IDGAF: I Don’t Grant Argath Forgiveness
random culinary tip: got some leftover stir fry that you're pairing with instant noodles that might not match the flavor profile? slap some harissa in there when you heat them up to unify their discordant flavour profiles and delight your palate
October 24, 2025 at 4:19 PM
random culinary tip: got some leftover stir fry that you're pairing with instant noodles that might not match the flavor profile? slap some harissa in there when you heat them up to unify their discordant flavour profiles and delight your palate
smartphone acquired and instantly, bam
October 24, 2025 at 2:10 PM
smartphone acquired and instantly, bam