Asher Langton
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asherlangton.bsky.social
Asher Langton
@asherlangton.bsky.social
Malicious software researcher. Technical debt collector. Aspiring woodturner. Former bus driver. He/him. Durham, NH.
Pinned
Lots of fresh, artisanal blocks added.
bsky.app/profile/did:...
Reposted by Asher Langton
Folks, when you’ve got it you’ve got it
November 1, 2025 at 3:54 PM
User interface is my passion.
November 15, 2025 at 1:29 AM
Trump’s One Big Beautiful Bill
The important thing is not whether the Trump performing sexual favors for Bill Clinton thing is true. The important thing is that we all pretend it’s true, and that someone asks Trump about it every day.
November 14, 2025 at 10:46 PM
Well that's an interesting way to cover the story, NYT.
November 14, 2025 at 10:12 PM
Reposted by Asher Langton
Oh wow @reuters.com got the photo here:
November 14, 2025 at 9:25 PM
welp, that’s enough internet for today
Jon Mcnaughton is painting the most patriotic blowjob painting ever conceived.
November 14, 2025 at 9:34 PM
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Years ago I was suspended on Twitter for inviting Marco Rubio to swallow ten D batteries, which I don’t see how it could be a threat; he and I were not even in the same room and I have at most six D batteries on hand
November 14, 2025 at 6:25 PM
I'm gonna start a $$$ boot camp to teach wannabe Alpha Males how to hold a fucking hammer.
True comedy is watching Dave Portnay trying to use a hammer
November 14, 2025 at 6:18 PM
man, I'd be really embarrassed if I had spent all day yesterday defending the principled integrity of the NY Times newsroom
what the actual fuck
November 14, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Seems like maybe we should be blanketing the airwaves with ads describing the (many!) subsequent crimes committed by Trump clemency recipients.
Today’s edition of wealthy criminals let out of prison by Trump only to commit more felonies and hurt more people. archive.ph/2025.11.14-1...
November 14, 2025 at 5:04 PM
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Sounds like he had a guilty conscience due to his work as Border Patrol agent.
November 14, 2025 at 2:02 AM
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Epstein: ken, would take a stab at the article for the law journal. ? thx

Ken Starr: "In the spirit of the bedrock American belief in second chances, that unhappy chapter in Jeffrey's otherwise-magnificent life should be allowed to close once and for all."
November 13, 2025 at 8:02 PM
opening the Epstein emails at random
November 14, 2025 at 1:51 AM
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I always get a kick out of the NYT Defense Squad trotting out harrumphing takes about how serious journalists don't report on mere speculation, blow things out of proportion, dig into their colleagues' email, etc etc
November 13, 2025 at 7:44 PM
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We know about Epstein because of the heroic work of one Miami Herald reporter (Julie Brown). The NYT did fuck-all to expose it, and based on available information, at least one person there helped cover it up. I know the NYT loves to take credit for other publications' work, but come on...
November 13, 2025 at 9:18 PM
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"I write for the New York Times, and I can assure you that we've never buried stories on behalf of powerful people, many of those powerful people being part of NYT management. We only publish what's fit to print, like Zohran's application to Columbia that was leaked by a white nationalist"
I don't understand why people have to concoct wild conspiracy theories in order to critique the NYT. I say this as someone who writes for them: there is plenty to critique without making up wild scenarios and insisting they're true!
November 13, 2025 at 8:36 PM
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the "wild conspiracy theory" is just an accurate description of what happened
I don't understand why people have to concoct wild conspiracy theories in order to critique the NYT. I say this as someone who writes for them: there is plenty to critique without making up wild scenarios and insisting they're true!
November 13, 2025 at 9:11 PM
getting harder and harder to comment on current affairs without violating this site's terms of service
Bovino: "Whether they were criminals or individuals that were taking jobs from Americans -- you name it, that's what they were doing. And I'll tell you what's gonna happen. We're gonna go even harder on the streets. If he releases those 650, we're gonna apprehend 1,650 on the streets of Chicago."
November 13, 2025 at 7:54 PM
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Oh, that Al Seckel?
November 12, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Reposted by Asher Langton
Not the most important thing -- but fascinating look into how Epstein was throwing money around to try and rehabilitate his Google search results, and some of the strategies folks were using to get it done:
November 12, 2025 at 7:43 PM
remember the old days(*) when these people were calling anyone defending LGBTQ rights a "groomer"

(*) like, last week
Megyn Kelly: "I know somebody very close to this case…Jeffrey Epstein, in this person's view, was not a pedophile…He was into the barely legal type, like he liked 15 year old girls…He wasn't into like 8 year olds…There's a difference between a 15 year old and a 5 year old."
November 13, 2025 at 7:46 PM
someone check this guy's browser history
It’s not pedophilia, and in some places it is legal.

You know what the age of consent is in the UK? Or France? Or NYC?
November 13, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Reposted by Asher Langton
Your only possible response, when confronted with someone saying this, is to wait for them to finish, firmly state “What the actual fuck is wrong with you?” and leave the interview immediately.
Megyn Kelly: "I know somebody very close to this case…Jeffrey Epstein, in this person's view, was not a pedophile…He was into the barely legal type, like he liked 15 year old girls…He wasn't into like 8 year olds…There's a difference between a 15 year old and a 5 year old."
November 13, 2025 at 7:13 PM
18 is “barely legal”. 15 is a CHILD.
Megyn Kelly: "I know somebody very close to this case…Jeffrey Epstein, in this person's view, was not a pedophile…He was into the barely legal type, like he liked 15 year old girls…He wasn't into like 8 year olds…There's a difference between a 15 year old and a 5 year old."
November 13, 2025 at 7:15 PM
Reposted by Asher Langton
November 13, 2025 at 12:20 PM