Paul F. Tompkins
@pftompkins.bsky.social
TV & standup & improv & podcasts, hardly any movies
paulftompkins.com/live
paulftompkins.com/live
I truly neither desired not welcome this information. I don’t care about dinosaurs and never have. Not even as a child. They FAILED. A big asteroid hits and they turn into pigeons? Why should I want to know about their throwup
A paper in Scientific Reports describes fossilised regurgitated stomach content that represents the geologically oldest terrestrial regurgitalite and shows new insights into the feeding behaviours and the trophic network in a late Palaeozoic continental ecosystem. go.nature.com/46xl3Su #Paleosky 🧪
February 16, 2026 at 5:20 AM
I truly neither desired not welcome this information. I don’t care about dinosaurs and never have. Not even as a child. They FAILED. A big asteroid hits and they turn into pigeons? Why should I want to know about their throwup
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
The thing that offends me the most about AI stuff is the lack of respect. If you don’t respect me enough to write something yourself, why would I read it. On the topic of respect my wife and kids give me very little and I have this problem where buttons and handles fall off my shirts and briefcases.
February 16, 2026 at 5:08 AM
The thing that offends me the most about AI stuff is the lack of respect. If you don’t respect me enough to write something yourself, why would I read it. On the topic of respect my wife and kids give me very little and I have this problem where buttons and handles fall off my shirts and briefcases.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
This might be my favorite frame of the decade.
February 16, 2026 at 4:25 AM
This might be my favorite frame of the decade.
Just a reminder that ChatGPT cannot betray anyone because it doesn’t have feelings or motives or thoughts
ChatGPT promised to help her find her soulmate. Then it betrayed her
ChatGPT sent screenwriter Micky Small down a fantastical rabbit hole. Now, she's finding her way out.
www.npr.org
February 16, 2026 at 4:47 AM
Just a reminder that ChatGPT cannot betray anyone because it doesn’t have feelings or motives or thoughts
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
A lot of 1990s photos of Oasis look like this to me.
February 16, 2026 at 3:54 AM
A lot of 1990s photos of Oasis look like this to me.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Sweden curling set up a sting operation to catch Canada cheating i’m fucking losing it
February 16, 2026 at 1:52 AM
Sweden curling set up a sting operation to catch Canada cheating i’m fucking losing it
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
This is fucking sick
February 16, 2026 at 3:42 AM
This is fucking sick
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
We are at an airport restaurant. A robot just drove up to us with our food, said, "Hi! Here I am!" and then drove away with our food.
February 15, 2026 at 2:11 PM
We are at an airport restaurant. A robot just drove up to us with our food, said, "Hi! Here I am!" and then drove away with our food.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
wake up homie, new culture war just dropped
February 16, 2026 at 2:08 AM
wake up homie, new culture war just dropped
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
That’s Dan❤️🩹🦅
Top right corner. Can't help but wonder if The Simpsons paid subtle tribute to Dan McQuade in tonight's set-in-Philadelphia 800th episode.
February 16, 2026 at 1:55 AM
That’s Dan❤️🩹🦅
Learning that Platner covered his Nazi tattoo with some “norse-celtic” bullshit is not convincing me that he was ever getting any tattoos “accidentally”
February 15, 2026 at 9:51 AM
Learning that Platner covered his Nazi tattoo with some “norse-celtic” bullshit is not convincing me that he was ever getting any tattoos “accidentally”
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Can you imagine writing or editing this sentence with a straight face: "If one can get a Nazi tattoo innocently, then Platner almost certainly did."
It would be bad even if **there wasn't reporting indicating this just isn't true** - which there is.
It would be bad even if **there wasn't reporting indicating this just isn't true** - which there is.
February 15, 2026 at 6:00 AM
Can you imagine writing or editing this sentence with a straight face: "If one can get a Nazi tattoo innocently, then Platner almost certainly did."
It would be bad even if **there wasn't reporting indicating this just isn't true** - which there is.
It would be bad even if **there wasn't reporting indicating this just isn't true** - which there is.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
It scared one guy, the screenwriter of DEADPOOL, and I've seen like a dozen separate articles that all state that this one guy now represents all of Hollywood.
February 15, 2026 at 6:48 AM
It scared one guy, the screenwriter of DEADPOOL, and I've seen like a dozen separate articles that all state that this one guy now represents all of Hollywood.
My heart and wallet remain Mormon-free
America is in the middle of a second Mormon Moment. For our Cover Story, Bridget Read reports on how the women of Utah blogged and posted their way into our hearts and wallets. tinyurl.com/484awp7j
February 15, 2026 at 9:39 AM
My heart and wallet remain Mormon-free
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Months after the killing of Charlie Kirk, a growing number of lawsuits by people claim they were illegally punished, fired and even arrested for making negative comments about Kirk.
Free speech lawsuits mount after Charlie Kirk assassination
Months after the killing of Charlie Kirk, a growing number of lawsuits by people claim they were illegally punished, fired and even arrested for making negative comments about Kirk.
n.pr
February 14, 2026 at 9:55 PM
Months after the killing of Charlie Kirk, a growing number of lawsuits by people claim they were illegally punished, fired and even arrested for making negative comments about Kirk.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Just a reminder that I’m not interested in seeing pictures of people or shapes that you think I look like, I absolutely promise you I get nothing out of it
April 15, 2025 at 7:57 AM
Just a reminder that I’m not interested in seeing pictures of people or shapes that you think I look like, I absolutely promise you I get nothing out of it
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
2Damp2Trash! A double recap podcast of the last two SOUTHERN CHARM episodes on Bravo by yours truly and @pftompkins.bsky.social. Happy Valentines Day, Damp Trash Detectives! open.substack.com/pub/weekendw...
*Bonus episode* SOUTHERN CHARM recap (S11. ep. 10 & 11)
2Damp2Trash! That's right, it's TWO recaps from your TWO hosts: Janie & PFT!
open.substack.com
February 15, 2026 at 1:12 AM
2Damp2Trash! A double recap podcast of the last two SOUTHERN CHARM episodes on Bravo by yours truly and @pftompkins.bsky.social. Happy Valentines Day, Damp Trash Detectives! open.substack.com/pub/weekendw...
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
hello and welcome to the political genius exam. here is question one. which is a more compelling message:
- the president is sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people and your town could be next
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $100 now costs $104.9
- the president is sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people and your town could be next
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $100 now costs $104.9
Romance alert: Trump's reckless tariffs have Valentine’s Day costs up across the board:
Roses 🌹16.6%
Chocolates🍫 18.7%
Ribeye 🥩 25.4%
Restaurant meals 🍽️ 4.9%
Roses 🌹16.6%
Chocolates🍫 18.7%
Ribeye 🥩 25.4%
Restaurant meals 🍽️ 4.9%
February 14, 2026 at 6:19 PM
hello and welcome to the political genius exam. here is question one. which is a more compelling message:
- the president is sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people and your town could be next
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $100 now costs $104.9
- the president is sending armies to occupy cities and kidnap and kill people and your town could be next
- a meal at the cheesecake factory that previously cost $100 now costs $104.9
Well this has ruined ugly jewelry for me
Everyone’s talking about Swarovski right now so let’s take a second and dive into the fact that they were NAZI Nazis. Like full-on Seig Heil, prosecuted after the war level Nazis and the modern company has done everything they can to hide all their archives and prevent anyone accessing them.
![Members of the Swarovski family were early, active and enthusiastic champions of Nazism, and at least six of its members maintained membership in the illegal party prior to Austria's annexation to Nazi Germany on 12 March 1938.!23] Three weeks earlier, 500 marchers in the Tyrolean town of Wattens held a torchlight procession that ended with chants of "Sieg Heil" and "Heil Hitler". The majority of the participants, police determined, were Swarovski plant employees, among them Swarovski family heirs Alfred, Wilhelm and Friedrich. 124]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:nvfznp5ls3wcf6aktlfkfkp3/bafkreicscf6waklhijry6fblsvr4psk7yku2jauu5hqsn4n765i4gkl2pe@jpeg)
![In its report to the state police on 14 February 1947, the Innsbruck district administrator called company head Alfred Swarovski "an enthusiastic member of the NSDAP." [25] Alfred Swarovski praised Hitler at business gatherings and took actions as a regional business leader to ensure that "Tyrolean industry could be integrated as smoothly as possible into the enormous gears of the economy of Greater Germany and into the National Socialist economic order." He sent
"grateful loyalty greetings" to Adolf Hitler on his 49th birthday and arranged a donation of 100,000 shillings for Hitler to establish a holiday home in Tyrol.!26]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:nvfznp5ls3wcf6aktlfkfkp3/bafkreifou66ng5baxhiicmm6d3zntcqosn7pqwzafclwf2qs7xtq7wvqku@jpeg)
![In 1994, historian Horst Schreiber wrote about Swarovski's past but was not granted access to company archives. (27]
The contemporary Swarovski company commissioned historian Dieter Stiefel as "a step towards dealing with our history in a serious and very pro-active manner," board spokesman Markus Langes-Swarovski said in
2018; however, the study was not published because, Langes-Swarovski said, "Swarovski is a company that generally tries to keep the owners' personal stories largely out of the public eye because it does nothing for the business." (28]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:nvfznp5ls3wcf6aktlfkfkp3/bafkreift4wajp6nsrzdrumb2cnyv7s5nvswakab7h62jnjqua4i7tf2qeq@jpeg)
February 14, 2026 at 9:24 AM
Well this has ruined ugly jewelry for me
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Choose your fighter
February 14, 2026 at 1:45 AM
Choose your fighter
We should repeal this law I think
Paul please start the conversation to repeal this law
February 14, 2026 at 3:02 AM
We should repeal this law I think
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
"zoomers are killing the bar industry" oh interesting was it zoomers who decided a drink should cost seventeen dollars
February 13, 2026 at 8:20 PM
"zoomers are killing the bar industry" oh interesting was it zoomers who decided a drink should cost seventeen dollars
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Drop more "said by [blank]" in the comments 😂
February 9, 2026 at 6:00 PM
Drop more "said by [blank]" in the comments 😂