Jack Boot
@jackboot.bsky.social
Some rando. I shall occasionally be reposting my old crap from the other place. If that's gauche, sue me. I only have so many thoughts.
My thingy-doos: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:x7c6xlcylaorwzbms2xlzjpf/feed/aaacjsujdyxeu
My thingy-doos: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:x7c6xlcylaorwzbms2xlzjpf/feed/aaacjsujdyxeu
Pinned
Jack Boot
@jackboot.bsky.social
· Dec 6
Me: Don't fall in love with me doll face. I'm no good for you; I'm bad news.
Her: No problem. Here's your change. Pull up to the next window.
Her: No problem. Here's your change. Pull up to the next window.
I have to give the missus credit. There aren't many problems she can't figure out if she has enough bungee cords.
November 11, 2025 at 8:41 PM
I have to give the missus credit. There aren't many problems she can't figure out if she has enough bungee cords.
We should rename Chuck Schumer's Democrats The Washington Generals. They are paid to lose. I can't get that lyric out of my head from Crosby, Stills & Nash's Southern Cross, "And we never failed to fail; it was the easiest thing to do."
November 11, 2025 at 4:13 AM
We should rename Chuck Schumer's Democrats The Washington Generals. They are paid to lose. I can't get that lyric out of my head from Crosby, Stills & Nash's Southern Cross, "And we never failed to fail; it was the easiest thing to do."
Reposted by Jack Boot
The overnight process failed and we will need to apply the self loathing manually today.
November 10, 2025 at 6:07 PM
The overnight process failed and we will need to apply the self loathing manually today.
Reposted by Jack Boot
As a Mass guy, I envy the way the word ‘holler’ rolls off the tongue of someone from West Virginia or Kentucky. Up here, we say ‘a chucklefuck just left the packie and whipped 10 losing scratch tickets into the ditch – or holler – next to the Dunks’
November 10, 2025 at 7:24 PM
As a Mass guy, I envy the way the word ‘holler’ rolls off the tongue of someone from West Virginia or Kentucky. Up here, we say ‘a chucklefuck just left the packie and whipped 10 losing scratch tickets into the ditch – or holler – next to the Dunks’
" "Jury-rigged" refers to a clever temporary solution, whereas "jerry-rigged" refers to something that was poorly constructed in the first place."
I never knew these were different terms with different meanings. You can Google the etymology. Interesting.
I never knew these were different terms with different meanings. You can Google the etymology. Interesting.
November 10, 2025 at 7:35 PM
" "Jury-rigged" refers to a clever temporary solution, whereas "jerry-rigged" refers to something that was poorly constructed in the first place."
I never knew these were different terms with different meanings. You can Google the etymology. Interesting.
I never knew these were different terms with different meanings. You can Google the etymology. Interesting.
Reposted by Jack Boot
"I know you're awfully busy, but will you get me some parsley, sage, and rosemary?"
"Yeah. When I get thyme."
"Yeah. When I get thyme."
November 7, 2025 at 5:48 AM
"I know you're awfully busy, but will you get me some parsley, sage, and rosemary?"
"Yeah. When I get thyme."
"Yeah. When I get thyme."
Reposted by Jack Boot
So of course you were right not to tell the mysteriousness that it was misbuttoned, I tend to miss the point of mysteriousness
November 9, 2025 at 6:19 AM
So of course you were right not to tell the mysteriousness that it was misbuttoned, I tend to miss the point of mysteriousness
Reposted by Jack Boot
Do atheists believe in Godzilla?
November 3, 2025 at 11:31 PM
Do atheists believe in Godzilla?
Reposted by Jack Boot
I'm so glad the commercial warned not to attempt having deer, lions, nor llamas drive a car.
November 7, 2025 at 1:34 AM
I'm so glad the commercial warned not to attempt having deer, lions, nor llamas drive a car.
Reposted by Jack Boot
Is the day before too soon to make jokes about my co-worker being shoved down the stairs?
October 17, 2025 at 1:12 PM
Is the day before too soon to make jokes about my co-worker being shoved down the stairs?
Reposted by Jack Boot
I don't flirt. Ever since my brother died in the great Flirting War of 2013.
November 8, 2025 at 10:53 PM
I don't flirt. Ever since my brother died in the great Flirting War of 2013.
Reposted by Jack Boot
whales talking shit about you again
October 27, 2025 at 1:00 PM
whales talking shit about you again
Reposted by Jack Boot
so I “accidentally” ate a portion of the protein bar wrapper myob
November 5, 2025 at 5:38 PM
so I “accidentally” ate a portion of the protein bar wrapper myob
Reposted by Jack Boot
Meet me at the clearing with a handful of grave dirt, a bucket of pond water and a sprig of thyme. Wear comfortable shoes and a hooded cloak. Tonight we will perform the Unalivening when the planets align.
November 8, 2025 at 9:07 PM
Meet me at the clearing with a handful of grave dirt, a bucket of pond water and a sprig of thyme. Wear comfortable shoes and a hooded cloak. Tonight we will perform the Unalivening when the planets align.
Reposted by Jack Boot
Friday night listening.
September 26, 2025 at 11:55 PM
Friday night listening.
Reposted by Jack Boot
Reposted by Jack Boot
Your pith helmet or mine?
October 25, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Your pith helmet or mine?
Reposted by Jack Boot
The leitmotif for The Creature from the Black Lagoon is banging.
October 24, 2025 at 8:31 PM
The leitmotif for The Creature from the Black Lagoon is banging.
Reposted by Jack Boot
I remain defeated when it comes to battle with a wasp.
October 26, 2025 at 9:21 PM
I remain defeated when it comes to battle with a wasp.
Reposted by Jack Boot
Is the song you hear charming? It's probably Cole Porter.
November 8, 2025 at 12:34 AM
Is the song you hear charming? It's probably Cole Porter.
Reposted by Jack Boot
My new surgeon told me to add more fibre to my diet, so I can't wait to tell him about the pizza I just ordered.
October 15, 2025 at 2:53 AM
My new surgeon told me to add more fibre to my diet, so I can't wait to tell him about the pizza I just ordered.
Reposted by Jack Boot
Fell asleep with wet hair and woke up looking like MacGyver again.
October 17, 2025 at 1:03 PM
Fell asleep with wet hair and woke up looking like MacGyver again.
Reposted by Jack Boot
If I have to step on people to get ahead, I’m not going anywhere.
October 16, 2025 at 2:54 PM
If I have to step on people to get ahead, I’m not going anywhere.
Reposted by Jack Boot
The picture I saw in the picture doesn't look like the picture I ordered. You bet I complained! They told me the picture I have is indeed the picture in the picture. Words were exchanged, most of them were the word "picture". Then they told me I'm seeing things. I said duh, that how seeing works.
October 12, 2025 at 1:26 PM
The picture I saw in the picture doesn't look like the picture I ordered. You bet I complained! They told me the picture I have is indeed the picture in the picture. Words were exchanged, most of them were the word "picture". Then they told me I'm seeing things. I said duh, that how seeing works.
Reposted by Jack Boot
Her words were so cold I didn’t hear them until the spring thaw.
October 20, 2025 at 2:27 PM
Her words were so cold I didn’t hear them until the spring thaw.