Crunkolas Driverton
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crunkdriver.bsky.social
Crunkolas Driverton
@crunkdriver.bsky.social
Idiot

Recents: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaailub3qgdqy

Pfp by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social
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Being popular on social media is like being the most conveniently located bathroom in an airport
*22 mins into watching a porn video* "once you allow for delivery time there's just no way that pizza is still warm"
November 14, 2025 at 8:43 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
me: hello, i have a structured settlement-

jg wentworth: go on

me: but I don’t need cash now

jg wentworth: i am going to have you killed
July 15, 2024 at 11:01 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
Keep turning up that dial, Bluesky! You're doing great!
November 14, 2025 at 6:33 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
New insult to life itself just dropped
November 14, 2025 at 3:57 PM
I haven't figured out very much in my time on Earth, so most of the advice I'd have for a younger version of myself would center around foods that end up giving us heartburn
November 14, 2025 at 3:29 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
hell yeah let's all post about the shit that sucks and makes everyone miserable
November 14, 2025 at 2:58 PM
Me: *trauma dumping every stressful or anxious moment in my life since 2020*

Guy who called me to run a scam about vehicle extended warranties: *desperately trying to end the call*
November 14, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
Shout out to all my people who end up short of breath for a few minutes each day because you forget that your body can handle the whole breathing gig without your forebrains getting involved
January 8, 2025 at 2:00 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to be annoying online
November 14, 2025 at 12:20 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
toy company CEOs: "at long last, we have created the Sinister Talking Doll Factory from the acclaimed movie 'Don't Create the Sinister Talking Doll Factory'"

futurism.com/artificial-i...
AI-Powered Toys Caught Telling 5-Year-Olds How to Find Knives and Start Fires With Matches
AI-powered toys are flying off the shelves -- but they're engaging in horrifically inappropriate conversations with children.
futurism.com
November 13, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
when people say what if there are prominent dems in the epstein files
November 12, 2025 at 10:37 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
QANON CULTIST IN 2017: "In this 1,879 page thread I will unravel the byzantine system of codewords and phrases the global elite use to mask their pedophile cabal."

JEFFREY EPSTEIN WRITING AN EMAIL AT THE SAME TIME: "helo its me jeff had fun cmmitting sex crimes wit u lst weeknd"
pretty funny in retrospect that QAnon hinged on the idea that powerful elites at the highest levels of government were smart enough to talk in code when sending emails to each other about their despicable crimes
November 12, 2025 at 10:15 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
pretty funny in retrospect that QAnon hinged on the idea that powerful elites at the highest levels of government were smart enough to talk in code when sending emails to each other about their despicable crimes
November 12, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
Really wild how all these Harvard scientists and mathematics guys constantly talked about how Jeffrey Epstein was this brilliant, "misunderstood" man and then you read his emails and he's clearly a barely literate lecher, extremely easy to understand
November 12, 2025 at 8:27 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
Touch grass you said

It will be fun you said

Sure I said what’s the worst that could happen

(severe allergic reaction and $200 fine)
November 7, 2025 at 5:16 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
I bet a factory reset would fix me
November 12, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
me at 17: I can't let anyone find out that I like Matchbox Twenty. that would be so embarrassing

me in my 30's:
November 11, 2025 at 4:39 AM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
Pardon my French. Imprison my Italian. Execute my Dutch.
November 12, 2025 at 5:06 AM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
"Let me suck the life out of this post."

- reply guys
November 12, 2025 at 2:39 AM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
The Aurora Borealis, also known as the “Northern Lights,” are a natural phenomenon caused by interference between the Earth’s magnetosphere and all the nudes you guys are texting each other back and forth
November 12, 2025 at 2:58 AM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
i am thrilled so many of you will see the aurora borealis again tonight. i won’t see it, but you will and i think that’s grand. i love when other people get to see things that i can’t & am not a small or petty person who would begrudge anyone that joy. enjoy being happy while i am sad. enjoy, mofos.
November 12, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Thanks to years of self-work I can now be broadly considered to be practically a human being
November 12, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Reposted by Crunkolas Driverton
Me: *diligently working to make money, to pay my bills, to afford a place to rest, so I can go back to work again*

Sisyphus- *looking around* Welp, I think we're done here
March 25, 2025 at 12:30 PM