Van Weasel
@vanweezer.bsky.social
Terminally online. Photography posted is mine, if not I'll attribute it.
Pronouns: any/all
Pronouns: any/all
Pinned
Van Weasel
@vanweezer.bsky.social
· Nov 8
I wrote this in April 2020.
I’m Fine
There are no innocuous questions anymore. “How are you today?” a cashier asked me. “I’m fine,” I said out loud to myself. Before the virus this interaction was the polite way to respond without saying anything. People with depression, trauma, or stress could
I’m Fine
There are no innocuous questions anymore. “How are you today?” a cashier asked me. “I’m fine,” I said out loud to myself. Before the virus this interaction was the polite way to respond without saying anything. People with depression, trauma, or stress could
Reposted by Van Weasel
Reposted by Van Weasel
Question: are humans cats or dogs?
Answer:
Answer:
December 9, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Question: are humans cats or dogs?
Answer:
Answer:
Reposted by Van Weasel
Bluesky Head of Trust and Safety found attempting to fornicate with computer in San Francisco HQ
December 10, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Bluesky Head of Trust and Safety found attempting to fornicate with computer in San Francisco HQ
Reposted by Van Weasel
December 9, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Reposted by Van Weasel
Reposted by Van Weasel
Me, eating a BLT (minus the L and T): Fix your heart and die
July 1, 2024 at 10:47 PM
Me, eating a BLT (minus the L and T): Fix your heart and die
Reposted by Van Weasel
In the year 2026: A new seafood flavored mousse would take the nation by storm, if it wasn't called Salmonella
December 8, 2025 at 3:50 PM
In the year 2026: A new seafood flavored mousse would take the nation by storm, if it wasn't called Salmonella
Reposted by Van Weasel
I should go back to nude modeling
October 8, 2025 at 3:14 PM
I should go back to nude modeling
Reposted by Van Weasel
Reposted by Van Weasel
using the save posts feature to construct a device which recharges my powers
December 7, 2025 at 1:50 AM
using the save posts feature to construct a device which recharges my powers
Reposted by Van Weasel
I bet if someone was to love me my whole entire butt would glow just like a firefly's does.
December 9, 2025 at 11:16 PM
I bet if someone was to love me my whole entire butt would glow just like a firefly's does.
Reposted by Van Weasel
In the year 2026: two words: Old Sheldon
December 8, 2025 at 4:02 PM
In the year 2026: two words: Old Sheldon
Reposted by Van Weasel
babe, please don’t leave me, i’ve won the internet twice just this week alone
December 9, 2025 at 10:24 PM
babe, please don’t leave me, i’ve won the internet twice just this week alone
Question: are humans cats or dogs?
Answer:
Answer:
December 9, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Question: are humans cats or dogs?
Answer:
Answer:
Reposted by Van Weasel
All animals are ontologically either cats or dogs. Comment with any animal to find out their unalienable category
December 8, 2025 at 9:17 PM
All animals are ontologically either cats or dogs. Comment with any animal to find out their unalienable category
If your toilet were sentient, would you rather it crave your bodily waste or hate you for it?
December 9, 2025 at 9:45 PM
If your toilet were sentient, would you rather it crave your bodily waste or hate you for it?
Reposted by Van Weasel
Future anthropologists: stop looking. This here is humanities most objectively wrong statement.
Nazis were not fascist. Fascism was used by Mussolini not hitler
December 9, 2025 at 8:06 PM
Future anthropologists: stop looking. This here is humanities most objectively wrong statement.
It would be so funny if a tele-operator running one of musk's fake robots pantomimed killing itself as the worker logged out and quit
December 9, 2025 at 8:10 PM
It would be so funny if a tele-operator running one of musk's fake robots pantomimed killing itself as the worker logged out and quit
Reposted by Van Weasel
RFK Jr was partially mummified while he was still alive, that's why he looks like that.
December 9, 2025 at 2:01 AM
RFK Jr was partially mummified while he was still alive, that's why he looks like that.
Reposted by Van Weasel
Reposted by Van Weasel
each of us contains the full genetic instructions for both testosterone & estrogen driven hormone loadouts (along with varying combos of both)
this can be changed at any time. our genes will even start expressing themselves differently within ~3-6 months.
this is an existential threat to fascists.
this can be changed at any time. our genes will even start expressing themselves differently within ~3-6 months.
this is an existential threat to fascists.
"current hormone loadout"
That legit makes me sound like a cyborg and I freaking dig it.
That legit makes me sound like a cyborg and I freaking dig it.
December 8, 2025 at 7:49 PM
each of us contains the full genetic instructions for both testosterone & estrogen driven hormone loadouts (along with varying combos of both)
this can be changed at any time. our genes will even start expressing themselves differently within ~3-6 months.
this is an existential threat to fascists.
this can be changed at any time. our genes will even start expressing themselves differently within ~3-6 months.
this is an existential threat to fascists.
Reposted by Van Weasel
Removing the pillowcase before humping my pillow so I can get pregnant again
December 7, 2025 at 12:42 AM
Removing the pillowcase before humping my pillow so I can get pregnant again
Reposted by Van Weasel
Skeeting is free
The designer calls the ring “an ‘external memory’ for your brain.”
Pebble Is Making a Smart Ring for Saving All Your Fleeting Thoughts
The smart ring is called the Index 01 and it's very hackable and customizable.
gizmodo.com
December 9, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Skeeting is free