Oblong Knoblong
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seej500.bsky.social
Oblong Knoblong
@seej500.bsky.social
knuckle crack the bone, 21 to win
Pinned
ok when spooky season is over, and before christmas season begins, i am not changing my name back to Planko Brownpiss, i am changing it to Oblong Knoblong
MY BRAIN: Stiffler's Mom boned that Minecraft villager
MY BRAIN: She got all up on his oblong knoblong
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Lol they got him a mirror like a lonely parakeet
Looks like shit bro
December 13, 2025 at 8:35 PM
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It had never occurred to me that “blowing smoke up your ass” was actually a thing. Thanks Science Museum.
December 13, 2025 at 3:10 PM
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New Telegraph columnist just dropped.
December 13, 2025 at 3:32 PM
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Basically, you've never seen the predator kill anyone who's terminally English.
When the first movie established that the Predator won't attack anyone who's unarmed, I'm not sure why the rest of the franchise doesn't involve everyone just putting their weapons on the floor and slowly backing away apologetically.
December 13, 2025 at 3:49 PM
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My second head canon is that assuming the Predator is species "normal" is like meeting a serial killer as your 1st human and assuming we're all like that.

I prefer to think of them as their species equivalent of stamp collectors, and everyone else winces at these nerds with their skull-collections
December 13, 2025 at 3:56 PM
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Guess who said “triple chudge funk” instead of “triple fudge chunk” in front of the family and will never live this one down
December 13, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Oklahoma U, where faculty aren't allowed to politely point out that your essay is just a poorly-written brain-dump which doesn't actually discuss the set topic & also doesn't even contain a single cited reference, even though a central point of the class is to learn how to write this kind of essay
From the Oklahoma U student paper: the school is now saying it will automatically suspend faculty (with pay) in response to student complaints
www.oudaily.com/news/ou-poli...
December 13, 2025 at 7:53 PM
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The absolute funniest thing about this is that the house pictured is legitimately an abandoned meth lab, as someone in Derek’s replies discovered (see thread for proof)
If you want to do something like this, why not buy a $150k home in a small town in Italy, France, Spain, or Mexico, instead of having nine people share one bathroom after they eat at a restaurant called "Stinky's?"
December 13, 2025 at 4:14 PM
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The fact is no presenter has ever had to leave the BBC for expressing conservative views, or even explicitly endorsing a right-wing party.

Was never a problem for Jeremy Clarkson. Was never a problem for Andrew Neil. Was never a problem for Alan Sugar
Robin Ince reveals to last night’s audience at a recording of Infinite Monkey Cage that the BBC has forced him to resign over his support of trans people
December 13, 2025 at 4:36 PM
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(Voice beckoning from amulet) please help, I've been trapped in here by a dark sorcerer for 10,000 years!

Me: why dont you just move to a city?
December 13, 2025 at 5:23 PM
I'll go further than this; even if no money at all went to Rowling when you get this game, or even if it cost her money each time someone installed it, I'd still think you sucked for getting it.
Please bear this in mind if you consider grabbing Hogwarts Legacy for free, thinking that you can accept/play it without it now doing harm. It's free to you but comes with a cost elsewhere.
Since Polygon is leaving it out of the headline: Epic Games partnered with The Game Awards to put money into the pocket of a bigot who uses her wealth to further the genocide of trans people through lawsuits and legislation. Every 'free' game gives money directly to JKR, and they are complicit.
December 13, 2025 at 3:09 PM
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it's actually kinda funny in a way to get to the finish line of curing cancer and having the government go eh you know what. never mind
A tiny trial in New York has shown that personalized mRNA vaccines can provoke massive, lasting immune responses against pancreatic cancer, even as sweeping federal cuts now threaten the fragile labs required to produce them.
theintellectualistofficial.substack.com/p/a-breakthr...
December 13, 2025 at 2:50 AM
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Huh. It's almost like when institutions stand up to that spineless coward fascist, he loses and folds. I sure wish more institutions would take note of that.
BREAKING: Seattle Children's Hospital successfully fought this summer to get DOJ's invasive trans care subpoena quashed.

The Seattle court partially unsealed the case this week.

This was the fourth, previously sealed case mentioned in this recent Law Dork report: www.lawdork.com/p/judges-doj...
December 13, 2025 at 5:17 AM
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Tired: Machine elves

Wired: Hundreds of little guys doing little jobs
December 13, 2025 at 1:43 PM
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Finally, what we've all been asking for at long last is here: a steering wheel designed by someone who is not a human being, and has never driven a car.

www.carscoops.com/2025/12/this...
This Stellantis Brand Is Quietly Preparing Its Most Radical Steering Wheel Yet for Production | Carscoops
The Hypersquare steering wheel and steer-by-wire technology are headed for a production car soon, as Peugeot begins early prototype testing
www.carscoops.com
December 12, 2025 at 9:50 PM
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Those tree hugging hippies in Hungary now lead the world in the share of electricity generated from solar with almost 25% of their electricity coming from solar in 2024.

A remarkable leap from just 7% five years ago.
December 12, 2025 at 4:58 PM
oh, they also got Rayna Vallandingham in this too, that's a smart move
Most of the Street Fighter casting ranges from "That seems right" to "I have no opinion on this", but David Dastmalchian as M. Bison seems wild to me. Not BAD wild, just, wow, not a vibe I'd ever have imagined for him.
December 13, 2025 at 12:52 PM
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Most of the Street Fighter casting ranges from "That seems right" to "I have no opinion on this", but David Dastmalchian as M. Bison seems wild to me. Not BAD wild, just, wow, not a vibe I'd ever have imagined for him.
December 13, 2025 at 11:26 AM
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Hero
"The raccoon that barged into a Virginia liquor store, smashed bottles of booze and passed out drunk in a bathroom this past Black Friday has at least two other break-ins under his belt, a local government official has revealed."
www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
‘He’s living his best life’: drunk raccoon hit DMV for snacks before liquor store
Officials say raccoon that broke into Virginia liquor store on 29 November had previously hit DMV and karate studio
www.theguardian.com
December 13, 2025 at 12:40 PM
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It's the time of year where I remind people that the actual text of A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens is really really good
December 13, 2025 at 6:25 AM
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must… resist urge… to correct the menswear guy… on the difference between a punt and a field goal… before he finds old pictures of me and sends my fashion sense to the shadow realm…
this feels like that peanuts gag where lucy sets a football for a punt and you can't believe charlie brown fell for it
December 13, 2025 at 5:34 AM
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Dick Van Dyke is 100 years old tomorrow.
I hope he's making the most of his finally night of Lego building.
December 12, 2025 at 11:10 PM
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My favourite real-life examples of this are silhouette (Etienne de Silhuoette), German chocolate cake (Samuel German), and Main Street in San Francisco (Charles Main).
the land raider and land speeder aren't called that because they go over land

they're called that because they were invented by a guy named arkhan land.

dees favorite joke about this is the emperor is named jimmy space and those are his space marines
One of my favorite brick stupid 40k things is that the Ultramarines aren't "ultra marines," they're called that because they are from a place called Ultramar
December 13, 2025 at 9:04 AM
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December 13, 2025 at 11:51 AM
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Shaved camel art at the Bikaner Camel Festival in India.

camelfestival.com
December 13, 2025 at 12:14 PM