Author | Lightnews

DeeDastardly

@mydmac.bsky.social

5.6K followers 350 following 610 posts

Dignity is overrated. https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lide4pmipalr44al3prwz4hv/feed/aaaniuz2cpqlg

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Nov 16

Don’t wait for bad stuff to happen, create the shitshow yourself.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Aug 8

I keep my friends close, but my cheese and wine closer.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Nov 26

My life is loosely based on a true story.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 27

I've always respected and admired people who think before they speak.

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Bogey @oneyebogey.bsky.social · Jul 25

Every day a new test of my composure.

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Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · Jul 26

Be yourself; everyone else is already Batman.

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Sam @samuelhlowe.bsky.social · Jul 26

I think it would be cool to merge retirement homes, children’s homes, and animal shelters. A community where older people teach young children about life and take care of abandoned animals together. I bet it would do wonders for everyone involved.

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A Shot of Steve™ ⚡️ @stevekoehler22.bsky.social · Jul 26

The United States is the new Evil Empire.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 27

You think you know fear, I've seen me naked.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 21

I know that you know that I know that you know that I know what you did last summer.

So now you know.

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Skip “Skippy” Skipperson @yippyskippy.bsky.social · Jul 19

“Put them in the freezer, we’ll make banana bread with them” and other lies we tell ourselves.

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Veruca's Alt @verucas-alt.bsky.social · Jul 19

Nothing good comes from putting on pants.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 19

I only get called ‘lady’ by little kids who don’t know any better.

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · Aug 13

Good news, guys. My shitshow has been renewed for a second season.

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Dak @dak.myatproto.social · Jul 19

My toxic trait is thinking I can fix my entire life by buying a new notebook.

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Nate's Myth @natesmith.dev · Jul 14

busy ghosts keep a to-boo list

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 19

Feels good.

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Canadian Bacon @tashaneedshelp.bsky.social · Jul 19

I love watching the sun rise, but I prefer not to be driving to work when it happens.

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · Jul 18

Her: How’s your anger management therapy going?

Me: Long time no seethe.

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Dan Cerinthedark @etbeeegood.bsky.social · Jul 18

In these awful times, it’s important to remain sexy in our own stupid fucked up little ways

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 19

The older I get the more I regret not having told more people to fuck off.

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Blair Loudly @blairloudly.bsky.social · Jul 18

ugh sequels. charlie xcx? how many chocolate factories does that kid need to go to?

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 18

I got stuck behind a learner driver on the way to work this morning.

I learned so much, it was awesome.

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DeeDastardly @mydmac.bsky.social · Jul 17

*watching exciting ending of action movie

Wow, I wonder how they keep those floors so shiny?

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Deeks 🫶 @deeks549.bsky.social · Jul 16

It's not graffiti. That building wanted a tattoo

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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · Jul 17

I’d fight a bear* for you
.
.
.
.
(*teddy)

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