Fransplaining
@fransplaining.bsky.social
650 followers 420 following 650 posts
His hair was perfect 🇺🇸🇺🇦 My Posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:tu3tysmm6bhr6w4m6m6frwzq/feed/aaaopztxkk5ea
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I will fight any dog on hardwood floors.
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*does basic life task*

*Rocky theme plays in my head*
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I simply cannot WAIT to go to bed tonight and lie awake worrying about shit I can't control
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It’s fine, I always wanted to fail miserably at something
Got a call and thought wow, it’s late, something must be wrong. It was 7:53pm.
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Alas, the hamburger needed more help than the box could provide.
Sorry I groaned so loud at the HOA meeting when you suggested we do Christmas caroling this year.
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I was on a road trip today and stopped at a gas station. When I stepped into the bathroom stall, the toilet was plugged into the wall. Apparently it had a heating unit as well as a bidet system. I did not explore the amenities.
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they say that exercise helps depression, but how did accidentally sharting on a treadmill help exactly
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Me: (checks only somewhat satisfied)

I feel like such a badass
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Turns out they don't make guacamole at your table here. No one knows who that guy was.
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Got tear away pants for this colonoscopy prep.
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some days you write a post so good that everyone ignores it because they don't want to disturb the whole unsung genius vibe you've got going
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can you keep a secret?

me: nope
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*Spends the first 7 minutes of my job interview carefully tearing off the perforated edge of my spiral notebook resume*
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Had a college team shirt on yesterday and the security guard at the store told me the current game score. I gave him a thumbs up. I didn’t tell him I only have the shirt bc of the marching band.
It was a good weekend, a mellow weekend, I peed outside a bunch. I’ll give it an 8.5.
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I only have a few friends but hopefully I’ll be able to get rid of them soon
Did my first slow motion old man fall today. Not great.
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Make Meemaw & Peepaw hate fascism again.
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When I was trying on jeans the other day a baby crawled under the partition into my fitting room. I wasn’t sure what to do, and I know my choice didn’t help my issue of not fitting into any of the jeans, but god that baby was delicious.
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The sheer amount of stupid has overwhelmed me, I got nothing but spite.
3rd summer here, 80 at 9:30pm. I’m ok with it.
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someone in Houston bring me a quizno’s sammy I’ll show you a boob
the larger one