This could be truly great if play has to change so that no one is hitting or throwing the ball too high

i found this in the parking lot. are you missing a jack? count your jacks and let me know if you are a jack off

that a bunch of billionaires have been irreversibly brainwormed by getting addicted to a glorified chat room adds credence to my theory that spending too much time on IRC as a child acts as a powerful inoculant to the worst impulses of an escalatory group dynamic

Probably best to chase it indefinitely

the ultimate price ✨

filling out a bunch of credit card applications for the monkeys at the zoo because i want them to understand debt

Front page of Scottish newspaper The National today.

Did you think it was a post from this site? Oh you sweet little caterpillar

A fun thing about this good site (that works) is that if I search my @ the only result is someone screen capping one of my posts

It seems very experienced at fleeing, which... is good

Oh no

things bullets say

You don't have to judge Columbus by the standards of today. His tenure as governor of Hispaniola was so horrific that he was dragged back to Spain in chains to answer for his many crimes.

Plus he never set foot on any land that would ever be a part of the United States of America.

It's egg shells, isn't it

I found a 19th century Cat Villain!

Inside the house, the potential serial killer, box open on the table, tries to distract himself from the voices incessantly clamoring in his head. He knows that he’s just one last tiny push away from madness.

Outside in the driveway, a cat stares at his stolen treasure, laughing quietly to himself.

Another bowl will fix me

You need to forget about uniformity in the glaze!
The temperamental kiln makes these bowls real!

“Make me proud,” I whisper as I add more cheese to the mac

Bet

Also: if you work for ICE, even if you’re not one of the ones arresting citizens or tackling 15-year-olds or zip-tying kids together and segregating them by race, you’re part of the mechanism making it happen, and you should suffer long-term social and post-regime-change consequences.

Therapist: tell me something exciting that happened to you this week

Me: well, McDonald’s has a new breakfast sandwich

Therapist:

Me: it has two sausage patties and bacon

Therapist:

Me: also two slices of cheese, I think

Therapist:

Me: why do you look so sad

(Buying a hot dog at the beach and releasing it into the ocean) Go on little one, you're free now