CaptHandlebar
@capthandlebar.bsky.social
You thought God was an architect, now you know he’s something like a pipe bomb ready to blow.
Sam Alexis, sir…
40/51 in the last 10 games.
40/51 in the last 10 games.
February 10, 2026 at 4:13 AM
Sam Alexis, sir…
40/51 in the last 10 games.
40/51 in the last 10 games.
Reposted by CaptHandlebar
If Bad Bunny was serious about uniting Americans, he would have given his Grammy to Donald Trump.
February 9, 2026 at 1:36 PM
If Bad Bunny was serious about uniting Americans, he would have given his Grammy to Donald Trump.
A lot more Seahawks jerseys being worn than Patriots here at SFO.
Weird.
Weird.
February 9, 2026 at 8:27 PM
A lot more Seahawks jerseys being worn than Patriots here at SFO.
Weird.
Weird.
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“GOD. DAMMIT. What the fuck.”
“GOD. DAMMIT. What the fuck.”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“I am not psychic. You need to tell me when you want something done a certain way.”
“I am not psychic. You need to tell me when you want something done a certain way.”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
"Stop humping your brother."
"Stop humping your brother."
February 8, 2026 at 11:10 AM
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“GOD. DAMMIT. What the fuck.”
“GOD. DAMMIT. What the fuck.”
At least the naming of the mushroom seems appropriate.
Four people have died and three others have required a liver transplants after eating the death cap mushroom that is proliferating in California following a rainy winter.
📎https://tinyurl.com/48mvsvwe
📎https://tinyurl.com/48mvsvwe
February 8, 2026 at 10:56 AM
At least the naming of the mushroom seems appropriate.
Y’all…
This Duke/UNC game is really something.
February 8, 2026 at 1:42 AM
Y’all…
It would be awesome if Bad Bunny drove out in the Grave Digger or Bigfoot monster truck.
My great ideas are always late.
My great ideas are always late.
What if dogs could talk. What if the streets were paved with candy. Shut the fuck up!!!
February 8, 2026 at 1:29 AM
It would be awesome if Bad Bunny drove out in the Grave Digger or Bigfoot monster truck.
My great ideas are always late.
My great ideas are always late.
This Duke/UNC game is really something.
February 8, 2026 at 1:26 AM
This Duke/UNC game is really something.
Reposted by CaptHandlebar
i don't see why they can't do all the track and field events at both olympics. put a coat on
February 7, 2026 at 1:21 PM
i don't see why they can't do all the track and field events at both olympics. put a coat on
USA vs the Brits in Curling.
It is like 1776 all over again.
USA USA USA
It is like 1776 all over again.
USA USA USA
February 7, 2026 at 2:56 PM
USA vs the Brits in Curling.
It is like 1776 all over again.
USA USA USA
It is like 1776 all over again.
USA USA USA
This year marks the 20th anniversary of the Idiocracy release.
Welcome to Costco. We love you.
Welcome to Costco. We love you.
February 6, 2026 at 6:12 PM
This year marks the 20th anniversary of the Idiocracy release.
Welcome to Costco. We love you.
Welcome to Costco. We love you.
Reposted by CaptHandlebar
The word don't is censored. Don't, or Don T. If you're looking for just some fun proof they're doing control+f censoring
![To:
Jeffrey Epstein[jeevacation@gmail.com]
From:
Sent:
Wed 7/15/2009 1:56:13 AM
Subject:
Re: florida visit?
good typing!
oh well, looks like it's a long flight anyhow... edmonton is so far away from EVERYTHING.
On Tue, Jul 14, 2009 at 7:49 PM, Jeffrey Epstein <jeevacation@gmail.com>
wrote:
i am tied up until aug
On Tue, Jul 14, 2009 at 9:41 PM,
wrote:
You planted a seed with your invite today. I have next Wed thru Sunday off (July 22-26), my last vacation for months.
I was going to take polo lessons in Calgary but I (DON'T) think my body can handle it! I pull a muscle every time, and I'm starting to realize my budding polo career might have to take a back seat to my actual job.
think
What are you doing next week?](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:2kpgkv4xcyduvylimyapgcj7/bafkreifsvmmha2afgveksvxc5czx4rwpan2e37riayppfadft5sfr43vxm@jpeg)
February 5, 2026 at 11:30 PM
The word don't is censored. Don't, or Don T. If you're looking for just some fun proof they're doing control+f censoring
Reposted by CaptHandlebar
money can absolutely buy happiness, you just suck at being rich like you suck at everything else in life
February 5, 2026 at 12:44 PM
money can absolutely buy happiness, you just suck at being rich like you suck at everything else in life
Finally, Florida gets something right.
February 3, 2026 at 10:47 PM
Finally, Florida gets something right.
I just realized that my childhood home phone number’s last four digits are the same as my cell phone. They are re-arranged but the same four numbers are used.
Does this prove that we are in a simulation?
Does this prove that we are in a simulation?
January 31, 2026 at 1:42 PM
I just realized that my childhood home phone number’s last four digits are the same as my cell phone. They are re-arranged but the same four numbers are used.
Does this prove that we are in a simulation?
Does this prove that we are in a simulation?
This is such a sad headline.
Many of the people whose ancestors lived in the U.S. thousands of years before Europeans are carrying tribal identification for protection against the Trump administration’s anti-immigration agenda.
📎https://tinyurl.com/yp9f2nbk
📎https://tinyurl.com/yp9f2nbk
January 31, 2026 at 12:56 PM
This is such a sad headline.
I started my day in Central America. Now I have to deal with this shit?
January 31, 2026 at 1:20 AM
I started my day in Central America. Now I have to deal with this shit?
Its like a snake regurgitating its own tail at this point, right?
It’s pretty fucking wild that the DOJ is releasing files that include accusations that the President of the United States raped underage girls, to distract from the fact that the DOJ is covering up murders of US citizens by their own government.
January 31, 2026 at 1:16 AM
Its like a snake regurgitating its own tail at this point, right?
Reposted by CaptHandlebar
xbox live took stronger action against jeffrey epstein than the entire us government
![To: 'eevacation mail.com 'eevacation@gmail.coml
From:
Sent hurl 1 / 1 : :
Subject: E-STOP: Message to Impacted Users
Title: Xbox LIVE - E-STOP: Message to Impacted Users
Xbox LIVE
E-STOP: Message to Impacted Users
Dear Xbox LIVE member,
This message is to notify you that Xbox LIVE has permanently suspended the Xbox LIVE
account associated with this email address. This action is based on the New York Attorney
GeneralAs partnership with Microsoft and other online gaming companies to remove New York
registered sex offenders from online gaming services to minimize the risk to others, particularly
children. As a result, any Xbox LIVE account associated with this email address will not be able
to connect to Xbox LIVE.
If you have an Xbox LIVE Gold subscription, or any unused Microsoft points, we are refunding
the remaining value of those to you within 30 days.
If you do not receive a refund within 30 days, or if you feel that you have been banned
incorrectly, please send Microsoft a notice using the process at www.xbox.com/notice.
Sincerely,
Xbox LIVE
[ ESTOP/P/I ]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:3lhbiajvxbvxr33ff64o2gic/bafkreiepjxjz42hpobdopqpgom2srzymfzoc6bczitgtqly44wtsqxp5eq@jpeg)
January 30, 2026 at 11:10 PM
xbox live took stronger action against jeffrey epstein than the entire us government
There is someone at IAH who loves yelling into the PA system.
I am at gate A2 and something about gate A22 (?) looking for passengers for the seventh last boarding call in the last 10 minutes.
I have a thing about people yelling into microphones. The PA amplifies your voice, ya idiot.
I am at gate A2 and something about gate A22 (?) looking for passengers for the seventh last boarding call in the last 10 minutes.
I have a thing about people yelling into microphones. The PA amplifies your voice, ya idiot.
January 30, 2026 at 10:04 PM
There is someone at IAH who loves yelling into the PA system.
I am at gate A2 and something about gate A22 (?) looking for passengers for the seventh last boarding call in the last 10 minutes.
I have a thing about people yelling into microphones. The PA amplifies your voice, ya idiot.
I am at gate A2 and something about gate A22 (?) looking for passengers for the seventh last boarding call in the last 10 minutes.
I have a thing about people yelling into microphones. The PA amplifies your voice, ya idiot.
Fuhhhhhh
Catherine O’Hara, who starred in legendary films “Beetlejuice” and “Home Alone” before taking a star turn as Moira Rose on “Schitt’s Creek,” has died. She was 71. https://cnn.it/4t7OhRR
January 30, 2026 at 7:01 PM
Fuhhhhhh
Reposted by CaptHandlebar
Uhhhh this file magically disappeared from the dump after being up for a while apparently
January 30, 2026 at 6:33 PM
Uhhhh this file magically disappeared from the dump after being up for a while apparently
IYKYK
(It is real beer but it is a real airport beer). Also, Global Entry is awesome.
#Heineken0 #PTY #IAH #IND
(It is real beer but it is a real airport beer). Also, Global Entry is awesome.
#Heineken0 #PTY #IAH #IND
January 30, 2026 at 6:54 PM
IYKYK
(It is real beer but it is a real airport beer). Also, Global Entry is awesome.
#Heineken0 #PTY #IAH #IND
(It is real beer but it is a real airport beer). Also, Global Entry is awesome.
#Heineken0 #PTY #IAH #IND