Mind Goblin
@slartibartfast34.bsky.social
Gruntled Employee. Load-bearing wall. Don't call me Reply Guy.
Pinned
Mind Goblin
@slartibartfast34.bsky.social
· Aug 20
laugh at my jokes you fuckin assholes
my mom went to church every sunday, religiously
December 5, 2025 at 12:00 AM
my mom went to church every sunday, religiously
Reposted by Mind Goblin
Ouroboros: Moooom! He’s making me eat my own tail again!
Ouroboros’ Mom: [smoking and finishing another glass of wine] Don’t make your brother eat himself, sweetie.
Ouroboros’ Mom: [smoking and finishing another glass of wine] Don’t make your brother eat himself, sweetie.
December 4, 2025 at 11:21 PM
Ouroboros: Moooom! He’s making me eat my own tail again!
Ouroboros’ Mom: [smoking and finishing another glass of wine] Don’t make your brother eat himself, sweetie.
Ouroboros’ Mom: [smoking and finishing another glass of wine] Don’t make your brother eat himself, sweetie.
Ouroboros' older brother: Why do keep eating yourself, huh? Why don't you stop eating yourself?
December 4, 2025 at 11:10 PM
Ouroboros' older brother: Why do keep eating yourself, huh? Why don't you stop eating yourself?
[NYT Meeting]
Boss: So, millions of people around the world love our games. What can we do to make them worse?
Worker1: Oooh, I got it, let's move the mini crossword behind the paywall!
Worker2: More ads, there aren't enough ads
Boss: Done, and Done.
Boss: So, millions of people around the world love our games. What can we do to make them worse?
Worker1: Oooh, I got it, let's move the mini crossword behind the paywall!
Worker2: More ads, there aren't enough ads
Boss: Done, and Done.
December 4, 2025 at 10:23 PM
[NYT Meeting]
Boss: So, millions of people around the world love our games. What can we do to make them worse?
Worker1: Oooh, I got it, let's move the mini crossword behind the paywall!
Worker2: More ads, there aren't enough ads
Boss: Done, and Done.
Boss: So, millions of people around the world love our games. What can we do to make them worse?
Worker1: Oooh, I got it, let's move the mini crossword behind the paywall!
Worker2: More ads, there aren't enough ads
Boss: Done, and Done.
they need a notification for when someone almost replies to you, but hits cancel at the last second because they decided it wasn't funny enough
December 4, 2025 at 8:58 PM
they need a notification for when someone almost replies to you, but hits cancel at the last second because they decided it wasn't funny enough
Cocaine so white it has a golf driving range simulator setup in it's basement
Cocaine so white it has a cameo in at least 6 Wes Anderson films.
Cocaine so white it just got a TRILLION DOLLARS yet still complains about poor people having anything
December 4, 2025 at 6:15 PM
Cocaine so white it has a golf driving range simulator setup in it's basement
I like my women like I like my coffee, sitting in the breakroom getting cold because I forgot about it
December 4, 2025 at 6:09 PM
I like my women like I like my coffee, sitting in the breakroom getting cold because I forgot about it
Reposted by Mind Goblin
jim henson, whispering as he shoves his arm up kermit’s mupussy: you little slut
December 4, 2025 at 3:45 AM
jim henson, whispering as he shoves his arm up kermit’s mupussy: you little slut
Cocaine so white it just got a TRILLION DOLLARS yet still complains about poor people having anything
Cocaine so white it got a cabinet appointment in the trump administration.
Cocaine so white it wants to know what IPAs you have on tap
December 4, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Cocaine so white it just got a TRILLION DOLLARS yet still complains about poor people having anything
Cocaine so white it wants to know what IPAs you have on tap
Cocaine so white it retired to Northern California to open up a vineyard.
Cocaine so white it pronounces tortilla with the Ls
December 4, 2025 at 5:07 PM
Cocaine so white it wants to know what IPAs you have on tap
Cocaine so white it thinks black pepper is "too spicy"
*this is my dad
*this is my dad
Cocaine so white the Phillies signed it to a 3 year $60 million dollar deal.
Cocaine so white it just got Dutch Bros
December 4, 2025 at 5:05 PM
Cocaine so white it thinks black pepper is "too spicy"
*this is my dad
*this is my dad
Cocaine so white it pronounces tortilla with the Ls
Cocaine so white it the cop let it off with a warning.
Cocaine so white it just got Dutch Bros
December 4, 2025 at 5:02 PM
Cocaine so white it pronounces tortilla with the Ls
Cocaine so white it just got Dutch Bros
Cocaine so white it has a 401k and paid stock options.
Cocaine so white it has very strong opinions about how minorities should feel about things
December 4, 2025 at 4:58 PM
Cocaine so white it just got Dutch Bros
Reposted by Mind Goblin
Cocaine so white it has very strong opinions about how minorities should feel about things
Cocaine so white Kevin Costner made it the main character in his latest white savior 6 hour movie about the "wild west."
Cocaine so white it has a cashmere sweater loosely tied around it's neck
December 4, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Cocaine so white it has very strong opinions about how minorities should feel about things
Cocaine so white it has a cashmere sweater loosely tied around it's neck
Cocaine so white it bans books
cocaine so white it sends its kids to private schools
December 4, 2025 at 4:32 PM
Cocaine so white it has a cashmere sweater loosely tied around it's neck
Donning the fuck out of some gay apparel rn
December 3, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Donning the fuck out of some gay apparel rn
I refuse to buy blood oranges, because of the thousands of people in forced labor, mining deep into the earth for those oranges.
December 3, 2025 at 7:55 PM
I refuse to buy blood oranges, because of the thousands of people in forced labor, mining deep into the earth for those oranges.
Reposted by Mind Goblin
Okay - Yeah - I can get with this.
youtu.be/Z7n3s5_M570?...
youtu.be/Z7n3s5_M570?...
"Hell No, I Ain't Happy" - Drive-By Truckers with Jason Isbell (LIVE on The Late Show)
YouTube video by The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
youtu.be
December 3, 2025 at 6:45 PM
Okay - Yeah - I can get with this.
youtu.be/Z7n3s5_M570?...
youtu.be/Z7n3s5_M570?...
King Leopold had "a different view" of rubber tree farm workers.
Hitler had “a different view” of the Jews.
December 3, 2025 at 6:18 PM
King Leopold had "a different view" of rubber tree farm workers.
Reposted by Mind Goblin
I thought I was completely over my addiction to taking money out of ATMs but I'm still experiencing withdrawal symptoms.
December 2, 2025 at 4:40 PM
I thought I was completely over my addiction to taking money out of ATMs but I'm still experiencing withdrawal symptoms.
Reposted by Mind Goblin
When she boutta hark on it
December 3, 2025 at 1:54 PM
When she boutta hark on it
Not trying to defend DJT, but I also like to sleep through meetings
December 3, 2025 at 4:39 PM
Not trying to defend DJT, but I also like to sleep through meetings
so yeah, fuck spotify
December 3, 2025 at 4:31 PM
so yeah, fuck spotify