alber
@captainacab.airbud.website
not really a dog. reposts = official CDC recommendations. he/him
CDC style guide: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaamfdxuzasv6
CDC style guide: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaamfdxuzasv6
Pinned
alber
@captainacab.airbud.website
· Oct 10
keep talkin asshole i’m pinning this entire thread
Reposted by alber
baking a king cake but instead of a plastic baby inside it’s my index finger
February 12, 2026 at 12:02 AM
baking a king cake but instead of a plastic baby inside it’s my index finger
non zero chance elon is envisioning something like this for the satellite moon catapult
February 11, 2026 at 11:14 PM
non zero chance elon is envisioning something like this for the satellite moon catapult
Reposted by alber
pipe down 5s a 6-7 is speaking
December 1, 2025 at 11:11 PM
pipe down 5s a 6-7 is speaking
Reposted by alber
Reposted by alber
i know propaganda is lies and fake and all that. propaganda doesn’t work on me at all (lol!) but i really think we need to start seriously considering the possibility of the propaganda being…true?
February 11, 2026 at 6:26 PM
i know propaganda is lies and fake and all that. propaganda doesn’t work on me at all (lol!) but i really think we need to start seriously considering the possibility of the propaganda being…true?
Reposted by alber
i hacked into your account and deleted all of your drafts you’re welcome
February 11, 2026 at 2:32 PM
i hacked into your account and deleted all of your drafts you’re welcome
Reposted by alber
Been saying "uh oh" a worrying amount lately
February 11, 2026 at 2:04 PM
Been saying "uh oh" a worrying amount lately
Reposted by alber
not a soul:
the republican party every few days:
the republican party every few days:
September 24, 2024 at 2:58 PM
not a soul:
the republican party every few days:
the republican party every few days:
Reposted by alber
listen up, nines. a three is posting
February 11, 2026 at 5:16 PM
listen up, nines. a three is posting
Reposted by alber
love is blind binge tonite 👀
love is blind binge tonight queen ??
love is blind binge tonite 👀
love is blind binge tonight queen ??
love is blind binge tonite 👀
February 11, 2026 at 3:06 PM
love is blind binge tonite 👀
love is blind binge tonight queen ??
love is blind binge tonite 👀
love is blind binge tonight queen ??
love is blind binge tonite 👀
Reposted by alber
Congratulations! You’ve been allotted 1 Tbs of stale fryer oil! Lick now? Y/N
February 11, 2026 at 6:52 PM
Congratulations! You’ve been allotted 1 Tbs of stale fryer oil! Lick now? Y/N
“so you just won your first gold medal, congratulations! what are your thoughts at this moment?”
forgive me father for i have sinned it has been two weeks since my last confession i have committed the sin of adultery on my lover and i’m really sad about it
forgive me father for i have sinned it has been two weeks since my last confession i have committed the sin of adultery on my lover and i’m really sad about it
February 11, 2026 at 6:49 PM
“so you just won your first gold medal, congratulations! what are your thoughts at this moment?”
forgive me father for i have sinned it has been two weeks since my last confession i have committed the sin of adultery on my lover and i’m really sad about it
forgive me father for i have sinned it has been two weeks since my last confession i have committed the sin of adultery on my lover and i’m really sad about it
reverse cowgirl so i can apply some preparation H to those hemorrhoids
February 11, 2026 at 6:36 PM
reverse cowgirl so i can apply some preparation H to those hemorrhoids
i know propaganda is lies and fake and all that. propaganda doesn’t work on me at all (lol!) but i really think we need to start seriously considering the possibility of the propaganda being…true?
February 11, 2026 at 6:26 PM
i know propaganda is lies and fake and all that. propaganda doesn’t work on me at all (lol!) but i really think we need to start seriously considering the possibility of the propaganda being…true?
Reposted by alber
![someone you know is gay.
[horizontal stripe gay pride flag colors]
someone you know is bi.
[horizontal stripe bi pride flag colors]
someone you know is transgender.
[horizontal stripe trans pride flag colors]
someone you know is an Astros fan.
[horizontal stripe Astros team colors]
maybe even someone you love.
think before you speak hate.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4p6vwihs2lznjpawpsn76isj/bafkreickojxglwkbqlawcgaqorqb7ifn6mxas2ofiwhpkuavxsmisnkutm@jpeg)
stun locking the barista with drink modifications
February 11, 2026 at 6:01 PM
stun locking the barista with drink modifications
Reposted by alber
Millennials are having our mid-life crises in starter apartments, it’s rough out here.
February 11, 2026 at 3:57 PM
Millennials are having our mid-life crises in starter apartments, it’s rough out here.
Reposted by alber
there is nothing more powerful sexually speaking than ordering a round of jalapeño poppers “for the table”
December 28, 2024 at 4:50 PM
there is nothing more powerful sexually speaking than ordering a round of jalapeño poppers “for the table”
Reposted by alber
"Fight against being ass" is a message that more people need to receive, tbh
February 11, 2026 at 12:36 PM
"Fight against being ass" is a message that more people need to receive, tbh
Reposted by alber
i told my dad i was switching his phone to dark mode and he said don’t do that i need to see happy things
February 11, 2026 at 2:44 PM
i told my dad i was switching his phone to dark mode and he said don’t do that i need to see happy things
Reposted by alber
having your city noticed by the president is now a natural disaster on par with a hurricane or major flood
February 11, 2026 at 2:12 PM
having your city noticed by the president is now a natural disaster on par with a hurricane or major flood
Reposted by alber
venus of willendorf is a literal god btw
June 10, 2024 at 5:25 PM
venus of willendorf is a literal god btw
if you trained claude on everything there has ever been written about color and the experience of seeing color, would it learn anything new if you showed it a red rose?
February 11, 2026 at 4:02 PM
if you trained claude on everything there has ever been written about color and the experience of seeing color, would it learn anything new if you showed it a red rose?
Reposted by alber
One of my fav “blaming young people for the economy” things was when I had a math teacher in school that calculated the difference in price between a McDonalds quarter pounder with cheese and one without cheese and how much you could save if that was what you ate for 20 years and it wasn’t that much
February 11, 2026 at 3:31 PM
One of my fav “blaming young people for the economy” things was when I had a math teacher in school that calculated the difference in price between a McDonalds quarter pounder with cheese and one without cheese and how much you could save if that was what you ate for 20 years and it wasn’t that much
Reposted by alber
No son, they are not "magically delicious." The workers made them delicious. This is a slogan meant to mystify the social conditions of labor
February 11, 2026 at 1:46 AM
No son, they are not "magically delicious." The workers made them delicious. This is a slogan meant to mystify the social conditions of labor