amanda carlyle
@amandacarlyle.bsky.social
no sugar, all spice. she/her
Reposted by amanda carlyle
Reposted by amanda carlyle
Reposted by amanda carlyle
As a child in school I never could have imagined that as an adult hearing “the vice presence of the united states got booed at the Olympics” my reaction would be an Eriq-Lasalle-in-the-ER-opening-credits fist pump
February 7, 2026 at 3:00 AM
As a child in school I never could have imagined that as an adult hearing “the vice presence of the united states got booed at the Olympics” my reaction would be an Eriq-Lasalle-in-the-ER-opening-credits fist pump
Reposted by amanda carlyle
"Does this shock you? Make you feel vulnerable? Endangered? Impuissant? SHAKE OFF YOUR SENSE OF SINGULARITY AND ENTITLEMENT, EARTH PEASANT."
[Blows a spit bubble.]
[Blows a spit bubble.]
I Am a Baby Staring at You from Between Two Airplane Seats, and I Know When You Are Going to Die
Look upon me, for I am the baby staring at you from the hollow gap betwixt two airplane seats, and I know when you are going to die. Do not turn aw...
buff.ly
February 7, 2026 at 3:00 AM
"Does this shock you? Make you feel vulnerable? Endangered? Impuissant? SHAKE OFF YOUR SENSE OF SINGULARITY AND ENTITLEMENT, EARTH PEASANT."
[Blows a spit bubble.]
[Blows a spit bubble.]
Reposted by amanda carlyle
sorry nothing short of “these people never get to have lives in public society again” is gonna cut it. unmask, prosecute, and blacklist every last one
Democrats want commonsense reform for ICE:
End the roving patrols and racial profiling.
Take accountability and abide by the same rules as local police.
Masks need to come off, body cameras need to stay on—no secret police in the United States of America.
End the roving patrols and racial profiling.
Take accountability and abide by the same rules as local police.
Masks need to come off, body cameras need to stay on—no secret police in the United States of America.
February 3, 2026 at 10:55 PM
sorry nothing short of “these people never get to have lives in public society again” is gonna cut it. unmask, prosecute, and blacklist every last one
Reposted by amanda carlyle
After seeing all the Epstein emails, I understand why CEOS love ChatGPT. They really CAN’T write emails.
February 1, 2026 at 5:24 PM
After seeing all the Epstein emails, I understand why CEOS love ChatGPT. They really CAN’T write emails.
Reposted by amanda carlyle
Is anybody else having a hell of a time managing their own inner turmoil *and* the constant external turmoil around them? I can handle one turmoil max. This is too many turmoils for me.
January 29, 2026 at 1:36 AM
Is anybody else having a hell of a time managing their own inner turmoil *and* the constant external turmoil around them? I can handle one turmoil max. This is too many turmoils for me.
Reposted by amanda carlyle
You know who else hates whistles? Rapists.
January 28, 2026 at 7:15 AM
You know who else hates whistles? Rapists.
Reposted by amanda carlyle
Imagine having Bruce Springsteen AND Billy Bragg release songs about how much you fucking suck and how much the people fighting you rule you within the same 48 hours
January 28, 2026 at 9:33 PM
Imagine having Bruce Springsteen AND Billy Bragg release songs about how much you fucking suck and how much the people fighting you rule you within the same 48 hours
Reposted by amanda carlyle
there's no answer to the question 'what's it gonna take?' but that doesn't stop it from popping into my head every goddamn time I look at the news
January 20, 2026 at 8:04 PM
there's no answer to the question 'what's it gonna take?' but that doesn't stop it from popping into my head every goddamn time I look at the news
Reposted by amanda carlyle
I wonder how many calories I’m spending daily on the cognitive dissonance created by thinking “this is exactly what I knew they’d do” and “I can’t believe this is happening” all day every day
January 18, 2026 at 10:58 PM
I wonder how many calories I’m spending daily on the cognitive dissonance created by thinking “this is exactly what I knew they’d do” and “I can’t believe this is happening” all day every day
Reposted by amanda carlyle
when you are petting a cat and the purr descends in register from “love it” to the louder slower “oh hell yes now that’s the stuff” purr, that is a blessing in this world
January 18, 2026 at 2:11 PM
when you are petting a cat and the purr descends in register from “love it” to the louder slower “oh hell yes now that’s the stuff” purr, that is a blessing in this world
Reposted by amanda carlyle
"I hefted the wrought iron fishing stick, felt its familiar leaden weight. 'Teach a man to fish…' I said, smiling wistfully. The forest enclosed me like some sort of massive tree convention at the Javits Center."
Poorly Researched Men’s Fiction
I had a whole gaggle of 100-point bucks in my sights, sleeping peacefully on their feet, like cows. The way they were lined up, I could take down t...
buff.ly
January 17, 2026 at 2:00 AM
"I hefted the wrought iron fishing stick, felt its familiar leaden weight. 'Teach a man to fish…' I said, smiling wistfully. The forest enclosed me like some sort of massive tree convention at the Javits Center."
Reposted by amanda carlyle
This makes me feel more patriotic than the national anthem ever could
January 16, 2026 at 5:28 PM
This makes me feel more patriotic than the national anthem ever could
Reposted by amanda carlyle
"We have checked our inventory thoroughly, and we no longer have any shits left to give. We only had a small amount of shits left at the end of last year, and now we’ve found that the most recent news cycles have completely emptied us out."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq...
FAQ: The Status of the Shits Women Have Left to Give
Q: I was wondering: how much of a shit do women give about what conservative old white dudes say about them? A: Thanks for contacting us. We have c...
www.mcsweeneys.net
January 16, 2026 at 2:20 AM
"We have checked our inventory thoroughly, and we no longer have any shits left to give. We only had a small amount of shits left at the end of last year, and now we’ve found that the most recent news cycles have completely emptied us out."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq...
Reposted by amanda carlyle
a blue whale’s anus can stretch up to over 3 feet making it the 2nd largest asshole in the world behind jd vance
January 10, 2026 at 9:10 PM
a blue whale’s anus can stretch up to over 3 feet making it the 2nd largest asshole in the world behind jd vance
Reposted by amanda carlyle
The “prosecute the former regime at every level” candidate has my vote in 2028.
January 7, 2026 at 8:26 PM
The “prosecute the former regime at every level” candidate has my vote in 2028.
Reposted by amanda carlyle
And this movie made a generation or two of bisexuals.
a man and a woman are standing next to each other .
ALT: a man and a woman are standing next to each other .
media.tenor.com
January 7, 2026 at 2:05 AM
And this movie made a generation or two of bisexuals.
Reposted by amanda carlyle
I'm not a historian but my analysis is it's "Not good" when a government constantly commits crimes and tells the legislature, courts, and general public "What are you gonna do about it"
June 9, 2025 at 1:15 PM
I'm not a historian but my analysis is it's "Not good" when a government constantly commits crimes and tells the legislature, courts, and general public "What are you gonna do about it"
Reposted by amanda carlyle
Report: No One Currently Thinking About You https://theonion.com/report-no-one-currently-thinking-about-you-1819579510/
January 1, 2026 at 11:00 PM
Report: No One Currently Thinking About You https://theonion.com/report-no-one-currently-thinking-about-you-1819579510/
Reposted by amanda carlyle
Pro tip: Turn off all your recurring subscriptions. Walk toward the horizon.
December 31, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Pro tip: Turn off all your recurring subscriptions. Walk toward the horizon.
Reposted by amanda carlyle
