Coffee Porter Jr.
@unlox.bsky.social
“From the number of imaginable cities we must exclude those whose elements are assembled without a connecting thread, an inner rule, a perspective, a discourse.” -Italo Calvino, Invisible Cities (transl. William Weaver)
header by MV, quoting Waikiki Wanda
header by MV, quoting Waikiki Wanda
Pinned
Coffee Porter Jr.
@unlox.bsky.social
· Nov 14
seems there’s someone else using the counterfax handle on here. here’s a verification jones to demonstrate I’m cfax from twitter
Ravens losing by 20 next week or it’s Tomlin’s last season in Pittsburgh, no in-between
you’d think people would’ve calibrated their expectations to this by now
December 1, 2025 at 12:20 AM
Ravens losing by 20 next week or it’s Tomlin’s last season in Pittsburgh, no in-between
Reposted by Coffee Porter Jr.
Joey bosa about to sack Mason Rudolph but he says something racist and Joey pauses like Superman and Batman realizing both their moms are named Martha
November 30, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Joey bosa about to sack Mason Rudolph but he says something racist and Joey pauses like Superman and Batman realizing both their moms are named Martha
Reposted by Coffee Porter Jr.
Watching c-span:
what do you mean they made up a rule for the bills
November 30, 2025 at 10:34 PM
Watching c-span:
max turndaballbrosver
November 30, 2025 at 10:05 PM
max turndaballbrosver
PNW brewers working on their pear ciders
We gotta build a new and unheard of contraption to put Bradford in
November 30, 2025 at 9:35 PM
PNW brewers working on their pear ciders
Reposted by Coffee Porter Jr.
The last thing I'm going to say about the very silly WaPo "slogan" story is that literally every "why don't they go with _____" I've seen people offer has been really bad
November 30, 2025 at 9:12 PM
The last thing I'm going to say about the very silly WaPo "slogan" story is that literally every "why don't they go with _____" I've seen people offer has been really bad
Reposted by Coffee Porter Jr.
lying to myself about how long it takes to walk to the nearest coffee shop, see y’all like three drives into Bills-Steelers
November 30, 2025 at 9:10 PM
lying to myself about how long it takes to walk to the nearest coffee shop, see y’all like three drives into Bills-Steelers
hm. I should’ve gotten a ticket to Seahawks-Panthers before people figured out they’d be good
November 30, 2025 at 8:52 PM
hm. I should’ve gotten a ticket to Seahawks-Panthers before people figured out they’d be good
Texans playing the Colts today
Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller
November 30,1954
November 30,1954
November 30, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Texans playing the Colts today
wrong rocklers doing their own sturdy belter creole because it’s Stove Touch Sunday
i like when the site moves from criticizing something to just kind of meditating on a phrase for a while
Cause she had a STRONG FLOOR… and you had your head all the way up to the no ceiling…
November 30, 2025 at 7:58 PM
wrong rocklers doing their own sturdy belter creole because it’s Stove Touch Sunday
BIRDMAN, NODDING: alright wayne, just use the second part then
I actually think "No Ceilings" alone isn't a bad slogan but the addition of strong floor really craters it
"High floor, no ceiling" isn't meant to be persuasive to voters, it's meant for donors, and I assume Jeffries, whose job functions partly by being able to direct donor money to favored and against unfavored candidates, knows that.
November 30, 2025 at 5:59 PM
BIRDMAN, NODDING: alright wayne, just use the second part then
Zac Taylor
Watching Air Bud: Golden Retriever and this coach sucks. He goes "hang in there defense!" And then turns his back to them to tell his QB that he better win the game
November 30, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Zac Taylor
BEAT REPORTER: so do you have an alter ego like JJ’s nine?
When he drinks water that Max Hosemer
November 30, 2025 at 6:08 AM
BEAT REPORTER: so do you have an alter ego like JJ’s nine?
[wistfully, in the youtube comments of a nirvana song] I was born in the wrong time zone
November 30, 2025 at 5:53 AM
[wistfully, in the youtube comments of a nirvana song] I was born in the wrong time zone
had a moment of asking myself “who the hell would alternate Jim Beam and Pappy Van Winkle” before realizing that’s pretty plausible for a Trump official
Breaking: Pete Hegseth convenes a emergency strategy session with his kitchen cabinet, Jim Beam, Pappy Van Winkle and Johnnie Walker.
Ummmm, seems like whiskey Pete maybe shouldn’t have tweet about the war crimes.
November 30, 2025 at 4:28 AM
had a moment of asking myself “who the hell would alternate Jim Beam and Pappy Van Winkle” before realizing that’s pretty plausible for a Trump official
haveing my GUNFUCK
November 30, 2025 at 2:11 AM
haveing my GUNFUCK
Oh I forgot about UNC-NCSU. How lovely that was, the forgetting
November 30, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Oh I forgot about UNC-NCSU. How lovely that was, the forgetting
how are you gonna write an article where the first word of your subhed is “letterkenny” and still think “I’ll argue for spending 6-episode season one building to a chaste kiss” letterkenny spent 6-episode season one building to someone getting kicked in the crotch, who do you think you’re talking to
but this? shut the fuck up. guess what, my man, gorgeous young 22 year olds like to fuck. And queer people deserve love stories that are sexy and horny. a "chaste kiss" please be for real.
November 29, 2025 at 11:47 PM
how are you gonna write an article where the first word of your subhed is “letterkenny” and still think “I’ll argue for spending 6-episode season one building to a chaste kiss” letterkenny spent 6-episode season one building to someone getting kicked in the crotch, who do you think you’re talking to
Reposted by Coffee Porter Jr.
My name is Mark Chadbourn and I’m here to say
Someone else’s content in a different way
Someone else’s content in a different way
PENTAGON PIZZA TRACKER ISNT REAL PENTAGON PIZZA TRACKER ISNT REAL PENTAGON PIZZA TRACKER ISNT REAL PENTAGON PIZZA TRACKER ISNT REAL PENTAGON PIZZA TRACKER ISNT REAL
November 29, 2025 at 11:26 PM
My name is Mark Chadbourn and I’m here to say
Someone else’s content in a different way
Someone else’s content in a different way
pete cornell, huh. I guess this is what we do when poochie’s not on screen
Bob Crumb coming out of retirement just to say "RFK Jr. is right about vaccines and my ex-wife should've taken more advice from me" is such a fitting end to Boomer Americana and everything the "alt-comix" movement claimed to stand for
November 29, 2025 at 11:01 PM
pete cornell, huh. I guess this is what we do when poochie’s not on screen
thinking about a good few people on This Website who thought this exact sentiment was sick as hell when a Star Wars guy said it to a Star Wars woman
“Should we follow the Geneva Conventions?” Pete Hegseth asked in 2024.
It’s almost as if there were signs!
bsky.app/profile/anna...
It’s almost as if there were signs!
bsky.app/profile/anna...
November 29, 2025 at 10:37 PM
thinking about a good few people on This Website who thought this exact sentiment was sick as hell when a Star Wars guy said it to a Star Wars woman
hearing there’s a bot that confirms if you’re old enough to do a swear
November 29, 2025 at 10:09 PM
hearing there’s a bot that confirms if you’re old enough to do a swear
Reposted by Coffee Porter Jr.
haha this is a funny burn of everyone else on here who is not me haha
Bluesky is full of goofy people who think they're still hot imo
November 29, 2025 at 5:34 PM
haha this is a funny burn of everyone else on here who is not me haha
Jonesy won’t stop barking at the maintenance people
November 29, 2025 at 6:23 PM
Jonesy won’t stop barking at the maintenance people