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Sam Whyte

@samwhyte.bsky.social

6K followers 580 following 18K posts

Well-meaning liability. British (derogatory). Sexual swear words are those of my employers. https://ko-fi.com/samanthawhyte

ko-fi.com

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Reposted by Sam Whyte

Take the clown statue and get out! WE DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS!!! @brainmage.bsky.social · 8h

If you want more information on farming and farmers, please scan this ooh-arr code.

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 7h

Sunday Fear is setting in.

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 7h

Could listen to them all day.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 7h

HERACLES

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 8h

I always think of them. Mad names.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 8h

Throwback to when I thought I was being catcalled, and it turned out to be a Dutch builder chanting "PSV"

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Reposted by Sam Whyte

Take the clown statue and get out! WE DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS!!! @brainmage.bsky.social · 9d

A couple of people have bought me coffee recently, which is super kind as I am on strike next week! If you would like to support my nonsense, and help me recover lost earnings, you can at www.ko-fi.com/guy!

This is now a thread of thank-you knuckle tattoos

Support Guy Kelly ❤️

Ko-fi lets you support my nonsense, help gussy up my streaming setup, or commission a Shrek 2 Collectable Trading Card tarot reading. It's a one-stop shop for profoundly strange decisions.

www.ko-fi.com

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 9h

absolutely not. Get thee to bed.

Reposted by Sam Whyte

Bouba's Delivery Service @fernmonkey.bsky.social · 1d

My friend Sascha is a professional musician and he's lost a viola bow on the way to Heathrow. Please signal boost to help him get it back.

Lost viola bow on the way from Honor Oak Station to Heathrow Terminal 2. The bow slid from its bow case somewhere along the way, possibly on the train. TFL contacted already.
It weighs 68.2 grams and has got a stamped DODD next to the frog. If any info on this, please pm me.

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 10h

Poor dude.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 10h

OH NO

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

Been to slimming world in there. Not a single ghostbuster.

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

Fair point.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

so hard.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

All talking as if they don't have a favourite pasta shape. Or a favourite nuggie.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

Good use imo.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

That's right.

Edward Carter @dotmund.bsky.social · 11h

That's because they're made from dinosaur. It only stands to reason.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

Absolutely correct.

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Reposted by Sam Whyte

Matt Owen @mjowen174.bsky.social · 11h

If you could please do us a favour and RT (or whatever it is on here) my writing CV I would be extremely grateful. I am a very capable writer of words, mainly “humorous”’ and if you have some PROPER paid work for me, please DM me. Thank you for your time www.mathew-owen.co.uk

Home | Matt Owen | Freelance Writer

I offer a broad and diverse range of writing services. Get in touch!

www.mathew-owen.co.uk

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

We're good, kind people.

He seems a decent sort. Family man. Not afraid to lean in to the Steps thing.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 11h

Her youngest backed me up when I said pasta tastes different according to the shape: "yes, because dinosaur nuggies taste different to regular nuggies"

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 12h

Thank God it didn't reach the kitchen.

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 12h

It was the most brutal pub in the area that bafflingly had a grim kids playground made of concrete.

Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 12h

Good afternoon to you, too

Building group chat

Hi all

There is a big dead rat in the carpark.

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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 12h

The only positive to come out of this.