Alex Marsh
@privatesecretdiary.com
Lapsed writer, lapsed blogger, lapsed most things tbh. Music, cricket, exasperationisms. Norfolk, UK. www.privatesecretdiary.com
CUT TO: footage of boat accompanied by kazoo music
“Trump-class” Golden Fleet AI-controlled battleships will be the largest "in the history of the world ever built" with hypersonic weapons, the most-sophisticated lasers and Cruise nuclear missiles and "ultimately there'll be 20 to 25 of these," announces the president.
December 22, 2025 at 10:53 PM
CUT TO: footage of boat accompanied by kazoo music
Reposted by Alex Marsh
i bet donald trump could beat anthony joshua in a boxing match. a lot of people are saying this.
December 21, 2025 at 2:34 PM
i bet donald trump could beat anthony joshua in a boxing match. a lot of people are saying this.
Family now engaged in an effort to move all the Christmas presents plus the tree itself so that we can fit up a dartboard. I knew this would happen.
December 17, 2025 at 4:24 PM
Family now engaged in an effort to move all the Christmas presents plus the tree itself so that we can fit up a dartboard. I knew this would happen.
Peppa Pig advent calendars retailing for 10p in Fakenham. SCENES
December 16, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Peppa Pig advent calendars retailing for 10p in Fakenham. SCENES
Reposted by Alex Marsh
Go home van, you're drunk
December 13, 2025 at 11:08 AM
Go home van, you're drunk
What skill did you master that you will never, ever use again?
Given any UK town, able to name its local or regional newspaper and which London rep bureau to phone in order to place a classified advertisement.
Given any UK town, able to name its local or regional newspaper and which London rep bureau to phone in order to place a classified advertisement.
What skill did you master that you will never, ever use again?
Calculating and preparing topical creams and unguents in a pharmacy.
Calculating and preparing topical creams and unguents in a pharmacy.
What skill did you master that you will never, ever use again?
Switchboard operator and using the telex machine.
Also operating one of those machines at the bank that put the magnetic numbers on the bottom of the cheques (to print the amount the cheque was for).
Switchboard operator and using the telex machine.
Also operating one of those machines at the bank that put the magnetic numbers on the bottom of the cheques (to print the amount the cheque was for).
December 8, 2025 at 12:12 PM
What skill did you master that you will never, ever use again?
Given any UK town, able to name its local or regional newspaper and which London rep bureau to phone in order to place a classified advertisement.
Given any UK town, able to name its local or regional newspaper and which London rep bureau to phone in order to place a classified advertisement.
A morning immersed in The Last Dinner Party, and a reluctant conclusion that I'll add their (totally banging) bangers to playlists rather than stick with the two albums. The Toyah-does-Jethro-Tull bits don't really work for me. Would love to hear a third album and be proved wrong.
December 8, 2025 at 12:05 PM
A morning immersed in The Last Dinner Party, and a reluctant conclusion that I'll add their (totally banging) bangers to playlists rather than stick with the two albums. The Toyah-does-Jethro-Tull bits don't really work for me. Would love to hear a third album and be proved wrong.
Reposted by Alex Marsh
Well. Looks like London’s new Tolkien theme park is going to be this year’s Glasgow Wonkaland.
December 8, 2025 at 10:13 AM
Well. Looks like London’s new Tolkien theme park is going to be this year’s Glasgow Wonkaland.
Reposted by Alex Marsh
Its open to interpretation
December 4, 2025 at 1:26 PM
Its open to interpretation
Right. Can we now trust England not to think 'oh, we're twenty or so ahead now - time to have a thrash so our bowlers can have a go' #ashes
December 7, 2025 at 6:46 AM
Right. Can we now trust England not to think 'oh, we're twenty or so ahead now - time to have a thrash so our bowlers can have a go' #ashes
This cost proposal to an already-aura-of-flakiness potential commercial client is sponsored by the National Association of Caveats
December 5, 2025 at 4:57 PM
This cost proposal to an already-aura-of-flakiness potential commercial client is sponsored by the National Association of Caveats
Cleaned the hob so that at some point in the future I can protest 'but I did that in 2025!!!'
December 3, 2025 at 12:01 PM
Cleaned the hob so that at some point in the future I can protest 'but I did that in 2025!!!'
Aw jeez misread the fixture list. Trip to Shropshire mid April for the first round of the Vitality Blast. Please, please let us have unambiguous weather. norfolkcf.play-cricket.com/Matches?tab=...
Norfolk Cricket Foundation
Play-Cricket, Norfolk Cricket Foundation, Matches
norfolkcf.play-cricket.com
November 29, 2025 at 1:06 PM
Aw jeez misread the fixture list. Trip to Shropshire mid April for the first round of the Vitality Blast. Please, please let us have unambiguous weather. norfolkcf.play-cricket.com/Matches?tab=...
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you've seen
Radiohead
Fairport Convention
Pond
Nick Mason's Saucerful of Secrets
The Proclaimers
Radiohead
Fairport Convention
Pond
Nick Mason's Saucerful of Secrets
The Proclaimers
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Peter Hammill
Kraftwerk
Hawkwind
Suzanne Vega
The The
Peter Hammill
Kraftwerk
Hawkwind
Suzanne Vega
The The
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Bo Diddley
Pulp
Eartha Kitt
The Fall
Hall & Oates
Bo Diddley
Pulp
Eartha Kitt
The Fall
Hall & Oates
November 27, 2025 at 10:39 PM
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you've seen
Radiohead
Fairport Convention
Pond
Nick Mason's Saucerful of Secrets
The Proclaimers
Radiohead
Fairport Convention
Pond
Nick Mason's Saucerful of Secrets
The Proclaimers
Two of our club girls just picked for the county pathway squad for 2026 and I'm more chuffed about that than pretty well anything else that happened cricket wise this year. They had to be really encouraged to put themselves forward to trial but they're both really great individuals.
November 27, 2025 at 1:38 PM
Two of our club girls just picked for the county pathway squad for 2026 and I'm more chuffed about that than pretty well anything else that happened cricket wise this year. They had to be really encouraged to put themselves forward to trial but they're both really great individuals.
Is it budget day? You'd have thought someone would have said something.
November 26, 2025 at 9:38 AM
Is it budget day? You'd have thought someone would have said something.
Loads of interesting and justifiable replies to this, but all have missed the obviously correct answer, which is Scooby Doo.
while I am posting trivia, which TV show do you think showed the sharpest fall in quality from first to last seasons? I ask because the answer is obviously The Morning Show, the last series of which was garbage
November 25, 2025 at 5:31 PM
Loads of interesting and justifiable replies to this, but all have missed the obviously correct answer, which is Scooby Doo.
Reposted by Alex Marsh
'And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas...'
November 23, 2025 at 11:13 PM
'And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas...'
Reposted by Alex Marsh
I think if I worked in a production company and was allowed to commission a movie with a €70m budget was based on one tweet, it would be this one.
November 23, 2025 at 12:13 PM
I think if I worked in a production company and was allowed to commission a movie with a €70m budget was based on one tweet, it would be this one.
Reposted by Alex Marsh
Why this prediction? Because translators and copywriters* are already being offered lower rates to 'copy edit' superficially plausible AI slop instead of being paid decently to do the job properly.
*Freelance advertising, trade press, instruction manual etc work is how many authors pay the bills.
*Freelance advertising, trade press, instruction manual etc work is how many authors pay the bills.
I wish more reporting on this made the point that novelists won't be displaced by LLMs suddenly producing literature instead of story mulch, but because decision makers focused only on the bottom line, who don't understand what makes a good book, will be persuaded story mulch has got 'good enough'.
New research by @mctd.bsky.social shows the impact of generative AI on authors in the UK. They found over a third of novelists report their income has already been negatively impacted by AI and 85% expect their future income will be negatively impacted.
www.mctd.ac.uk/impact-of-ge...
www.mctd.ac.uk/impact-of-ge...
November 23, 2025 at 10:27 AM
Why this prediction? Because translators and copywriters* are already being offered lower rates to 'copy edit' superficially plausible AI slop instead of being paid decently to do the job properly.
*Freelance advertising, trade press, instruction manual etc work is how many authors pay the bills.
*Freelance advertising, trade press, instruction manual etc work is how many authors pay the bills.
He's basically reached peak Davros. Just waiting now for the daleks to turn on him or somebody to turn up wondering if they have the right. (absolutely do have the right please do go ahead no prob)
A sitting president shouting that people should be jailed for telling the military to follow the law.
You can hear the panic in every capital letter.
You can hear the panic in every capital letter.
November 23, 2025 at 9:38 AM
He's basically reached peak Davros. Just waiting now for the daleks to turn on him or somebody to turn up wondering if they have the right. (absolutely do have the right please do go ahead no prob)
Thought I'd take a day to process my grief before the mandatory 'this aged well' QT
Very satisfactory #ashes
November 23, 2025 at 9:14 AM
Thought I'd take a day to process my grief before the mandatory 'this aged well' QT
Excellent undercover work from our Great Witchingham boys over the summer here, chipping away at him nicely with an eye to today. 🦆
Norfolk cricket hits @theathletic.com! (Not something I imagined writing a few yrs ago.)
Lovely stuff from @nickmiller79.bsky.social on Jake Weatherald — and a pocket of yellow & green in England hoping for at least a slither of Australian magic during the Ashes ...
www.nytimes.com/athletic/678...
Lovely stuff from @nickmiller79.bsky.social on Jake Weatherald — and a pocket of yellow & green in England hoping for at least a slither of Australian magic during the Ashes ...
www.nytimes.com/athletic/678...
Jake Weatherald: The Ashes rookie who went from an English village to Australia’s Test squad
Australia's rookie opening batsman was playing amateur cricket two years ago, but is now ready to shine on cricket's biggest stage
www.nytimes.com
November 21, 2025 at 10:37 AM
Excellent undercover work from our Great Witchingham boys over the summer here, chipping away at him nicely with an eye to today. 🦆