necron1997.bsky.social
@necron1997.bsky.social
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I patiently explain to the Secretary of General of NATO that leashes are Republican coded but dog girls are Democrat coded but only if they're trans as he nods and writes down "ASK FRANCE FOR MORE NUKES" in his notepad.
"Unleash" is a very Republican-coded word in American politics
January 21, 2026 at 2:52 PM
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Unironically, one major problem for him is that he very obviously won't be grateful because all the NATO blood in Afghanistan meant nothing and therefore the promise of American gratitude carries less value than a Zimbabwean nickel.
Trump full Mafia warning to Europe on Greenland: “So you have a choice. You can say yes and we will be very grateful. Or you can so no…and we will remember.”
January 21, 2026 at 2:58 PM
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In a cosmic sort of way it’s darkly funny that the “pink tax” used to be a relatively abstract concept and now it’s literally quantifiably a thirty-nine percent export tax for being a woman.
President Trump says he decided to levy a 39% tariff on Swiss exports because Helene Budliger Artieda, director of the State Secretariat for Economic Affairs, “just rubbed me the wrong way.”
January 21, 2026 at 3:33 PM
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In fairness, if you’re trans and entertaining where and how to get the fuck of out dodge if things go tits up before your tits go up, it isn‘t an entirely irrelevant question.
"will europeans hate us even though we're smol beans who didn't vote for him" feels like a really narcissistic discourse even by our unbelievably highly narcissistic standards
January 21, 2026 at 3:38 PM
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“Look, either the Constitution means something or it doesn’t. You can’t just say we are democracy if a thing impacts your stock portfolio and a dictatorship if it doesn’t.”

“Welcome to anocracy, fucko.”

Weirdly cathartic for Trump to be on the receiving end of Calvinball SCOTUS logic for once.
Kavanaugh to Sauer on the Fed:

"Your position that there's no judicial review, no process required, no remedy available, very low bar for cause — that the President alone determines — and that would weaken if not shatter the independence of the Federal Reserve."
January 21, 2026 at 4:03 PM
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A woman shows one inch too much boob and she's a slut but this guy can just walk up to the podium and read a fucking porno script and still be president of the United States.
Trump on NATO: "Until the last few days when I told them about Iceland, they loved me. They called me daddy."

(He means Greenland.)
January 21, 2026 at 4:25 PM
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I feel like the media is so desperate to normalize Trump in any little way, just as some coping mechanism.
Remember what I said about how when Trump falters, the media inserts a fake, imaginary version of Trump into the news instead?
Right on cue, here are the push alerts from the 3 major newspapers lmao
January 21, 2026 at 4:47 PM
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This sounds like an exaggeration but the leadership of the Washington Post still supports Trump despite the Trump administration illegally seizing one of their reporter's phones, and despite Trump's open alliance with a guy who murdered a newspaper contributor bsky.app/profile/char...
The media would support Trump up until and including the moment he has them purged by death squads.
Remember what I said about how when Trump falters, the media inserts a fake, imaginary version of Trump into the news instead?
January 21, 2026 at 10:34 PM
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Once again reiterating that it's a genuine problem for U.S. diplomacy that American elites are too goddamn stupid to see "The president is deterred by the threat armed force" and "Mister Trump does a Reasonable Diplomacy because The System Worked" are entirely different outcomes.
Remember what I said about how when Trump falters, the media inserts a fake, imaginary version of Trump into the news instead?
Right on cue, here are the push alerts from the 3 major newspapers lmao
January 21, 2026 at 4:51 PM
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I really do think "caretaking" being fem-coded and growing to encompass like... basic civilizational upkeep... is somehow the key to all this. Paladin went from the most masc-coded to the most fem-coded class. IDK how to articulate this intelligently.
It does seem like femininity, while it was also somewhat fragmented along socioeconomic and ethnic/cultural lines, has fragmented yet further along ideological lines, and now it's a crap shoot
January 21, 2026 at 5:01 PM
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-Heals, buffs, and auras
-Good at talking
-Insists everyone follows the rules and gets called a buzkill for it
-Has to double as the party fighter and cleric
-Gets blamed for doing either job too poorly or too well
Paladin is fem coded now????
January 21, 2026 at 5:08 PM
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Way ahead of you.
January 21, 2026 at 5:15 PM
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Literally just fly the NATO and Greenlandic flags on base and refuse to look each other in the eye.
US and EU troops forced to have the most awkward conversations in Nuuk
January 21, 2026 at 5:45 PM
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I really do think we underestimate the odds of Trump tweeting I DECLARE ANNEXATION and the rest of NATO going "nuh-uh" and then nobody having the slightest clue what to do after that.
SOF, especially US SOF with their vast array of enablers succeed dramatically because of those enablers, and their heightened training and equipment when relative to their usual third-world adversaries exacerbates the advantage in their given mission profile.
January 21, 2026 at 5:41 PM
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The Scrin in Command and Conquer 3 are funny because they get curb stomped by GDI but it's like an "incompetent boss screws up poorly organized mining operation" thing rather than a "humanity, fuck yeah," thing.
Reach should have never fallen
January 21, 2026 at 6:05 PM
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The funniest possible twist for Command and Conquer 4 would have been the president of space submitting a GDI application for the Scrin because they're the only ones who have ever had any luck dealing with Kane.
"Alien invasion repelled because alien middle management didn't restock the monkey repellant as a cost saving measure."
January 21, 2026 at 6:10 PM
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GDI campaign: Upholding global security in the face of terrorism and ecological collapse.

NOD campaign: Uprising of the left behind against the ruling classes.

Scrin campaign: Failed attempt to open a Starbucks in rural Mississippi.
Your official job title in the Scrin campaign is "foreman".
You're running a work crew, not an army.

Also your boss tries to leave you stranded, possibly to pin the blame on you for the massive clusterfuck.
January 21, 2026 at 6:13 PM
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scrin version of Kitchen Nightmares where the foreman keeps insisting to Alien Gordon Ramsay that there's anything wrong with his operation and in the background there's Orcas leveling his base with bombing runs
January 21, 2026 at 6:22 PM
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Good advice for most, but I fear even the Europeanest of Europeans can hear the banjos play when I open my mouth.
My not-particularly-joking advice is to pretend you're Canadian, we can't tell the difference in accents, I promise.
January 21, 2026 at 6:35 PM
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"The Euros are weaklings who won't stand up for themselves and how dare they stand up for themselves" is too on the nose for satire and yet it's the official stance from Washington.
January 21, 2026 at 6:42 PM
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The American position is that climate change is a Chinese hoax which will expand Greenland's strategic importance for homeland defense and that is why U.S. allies who are too unwilling to stand up to evil should stop standing up to evil and cede their territory to protect their territory.
January 21, 2026 at 6:57 PM
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This is actually a weirdly boring time to specialize in International Relations because there's no actual intellectual substance to any of this. Like, yeah, man. Shit's fucked. Fucker's nutso. That sort of insight is why I'm a fancy-pants political scientist you should all respect and consult.
January 21, 2026 at 7:08 PM
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*wisely, in my "I have read ten million books" voice

If a bad person does a bad thing and nobody stops him, he will do a bad thing because he was not stopped.
But genuinely senile/nuts people in firm control of a Great Power is pretty interesting academically, no? I mean, there was Kaiser Wilhelm II, and maybe Hitler....
Actually I'm not sure I like where I'm going with this.
January 21, 2026 at 7:37 PM
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I think there's certainly a level of denial from old school GOPers that their Reaganite fantasies are totally untethered from reality. But "the U.S. wants a Europe that does whatever it says but doesn't need it" has always been an unsustainable undercurrent of transatlantic relations this century.
There's a large overlap in many European militaries between extreme weather troops and elite infantry. The sort of troops the Europeans are looking to send are probably capable of disappearing a platoon of SEALs if they outnumber them, especially if the latter have no air support..
January 21, 2026 at 6:49 PM
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Conservatives will complain about everything being gender and then make everything so gender two genders can no longer contain all the gender.
Not unlike the guys on Craigslist who say they're looking for women without jobs that can do TradWife duties, but no gold-diggers! The women have to pay their own way too!
January 21, 2026 at 7:41 PM