Keith Taylor
@mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social
Bestselling author of This Is the Way the World Ends: an Oral History of the Zombie War: http://amzn.to/3O6xBWm
Anti-Brexit and pro-Free Movement. Denizen of Mongolia
Posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaak2agiw6iwg
Anti-Brexit and pro-Free Movement. Denizen of Mongolia
Posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaak2agiw6iwg
Pinned
Apropos of absolutely nothing at all, my novel This Is the Way the World Ends: an Oral History of the Zombie War contains lots of valuable tips to help you survive the collapse of society.
I mean... most of the tips are zombie related, but they're transferable.
www.amazon.com/This-Way-Wor...
I mean... most of the tips are zombie related, but they're transferable.
www.amazon.com/This-Way-Wor...
Reposted by Keith Taylor
I don’t want a fun-sized Snickers. I want the full bar, the full commitment, the full emotional nougat.
November 16, 2025 at 4:14 PM
I don’t want a fun-sized Snickers. I want the full bar, the full commitment, the full emotional nougat.
Me: I want every online fitness influencer to learn how to correctly pronounce the word 'eccentric'.
Genie: You know this is your final wish, right?
Genie: You know this is your final wish, right?
November 16, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Me: I want every online fitness influencer to learn how to correctly pronounce the word 'eccentric'.
Genie: You know this is your final wish, right?
Genie: You know this is your final wish, right?
"If you vote for anyone but Labour you get Reform," they insist.
The UK voted for Labour. It got Reform.
The UK voted for Labour. It got Reform.
There is no difference in practice between removing rights of individuals and leaving the ECHR. The end outcome is still the same, people lose rights. If human rights are an obstacle to your policy it is not the rights which are the issue, it is your policy. Labour going full Reform at this stage.
November 16, 2025 at 11:49 AM
"If you vote for anyone but Labour you get Reform," they insist.
The UK voted for Labour. It got Reform.
The UK voted for Labour. It got Reform.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Every time I hear a politician say that an issue is “dividing” this country they always then come down on the side of the right wing view of it. Just once I’d love to hear someone say “this issue is divisive, which is why I’m making the argument that kindness and compassion is important”
November 16, 2025 at 9:58 AM
Every time I hear a politician say that an issue is “dividing” this country they always then come down on the side of the right wing view of it. Just once I’d love to hear someone say “this issue is divisive, which is why I’m making the argument that kindness and compassion is important”
Urgh. Woman adds me on IG. Finds a story in my highlights featuring my ex. "Is this your girlfriend?" 30 seconds later. "K bye." Unfollows.
Is there any way I can skip dating and just teleport to three years into a relationship with someone normal? Because nope to aaaaaaall of this.
Is there any way I can skip dating and just teleport to three years into a relationship with someone normal? Because nope to aaaaaaall of this.
November 16, 2025 at 4:10 AM
Urgh. Woman adds me on IG. Finds a story in my highlights featuring my ex. "Is this your girlfriend?" 30 seconds later. "K bye." Unfollows.
Is there any way I can skip dating and just teleport to three years into a relationship with someone normal? Because nope to aaaaaaall of this.
Is there any way I can skip dating and just teleport to three years into a relationship with someone normal? Because nope to aaaaaaall of this.
Me in the bar: OK, enough now, I need to meet a woman to get over my ex. Where are the attractive women? Google 'how to meet women?'
Me looking at a dozen attractive uncontacted Tinder matches and 115 likes: I assume this is some kind of cruel trick. Should probably talk to my ex about it.
Me looking at a dozen attractive uncontacted Tinder matches and 115 likes: I assume this is some kind of cruel trick. Should probably talk to my ex about it.
November 15, 2025 at 3:29 AM
Me in the bar: OK, enough now, I need to meet a woman to get over my ex. Where are the attractive women? Google 'how to meet women?'
Me looking at a dozen attractive uncontacted Tinder matches and 115 likes: I assume this is some kind of cruel trick. Should probably talk to my ex about it.
Me looking at a dozen attractive uncontacted Tinder matches and 115 likes: I assume this is some kind of cruel trick. Should probably talk to my ex about it.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
no one ever says “let’s not underthink this”, but I think they should
November 14, 2025 at 9:05 AM
no one ever says “let’s not underthink this”, but I think they should
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Fully aware the chaos of US politics is engineered to keep everyone obsessively feeding the drama machine, but wow does it make being online feel like punishment.
November 14, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Fully aware the chaos of US politics is engineered to keep everyone obsessively feeding the drama machine, but wow does it make being online feel like punishment.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Give a man a fish and someone with a thousand fishes is going to bitch about people getting free handouts. Teach a man to fish? Yeah, that person with a thousand fishes is going to bitch about that too.
November 14, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Give a man a fish and someone with a thousand fishes is going to bitch about people getting free handouts. Teach a man to fish? Yeah, that person with a thousand fishes is going to bitch about that too.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
I have a friend who wanted to post "For the Epsteinth time, release the files!" but was scared but honestly that's such an amazing pun I couldn't keep it from y'all
November 14, 2025 at 2:27 AM
I have a friend who wanted to post "For the Epsteinth time, release the files!" but was scared but honestly that's such an amazing pun I couldn't keep it from y'all
The time I've spent holding the lobby door for older folk can be counted in hours. A nasty old lady just let it lock on me while carrying heavy bags in the snow.
I'll remember your face, & the next time I see you I'll still hold the door for you with a smile. I WON'T LET YOU CHANGE WHO I AM, CRONE.
I'll remember your face, & the next time I see you I'll still hold the door for you with a smile. I WON'T LET YOU CHANGE WHO I AM, CRONE.
November 13, 2025 at 9:13 AM
The time I've spent holding the lobby door for older folk can be counted in hours. A nasty old lady just let it lock on me while carrying heavy bags in the snow.
I'll remember your face, & the next time I see you I'll still hold the door for you with a smile. I WON'T LET YOU CHANGE WHO I AM, CRONE.
I'll remember your face, & the next time I see you I'll still hold the door for you with a smile. I WON'T LET YOU CHANGE WHO I AM, CRONE.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
COMPUTER TIP: PNG stands for Penis Not Good
November 13, 2025 at 3:11 AM
COMPUTER TIP: PNG stands for Penis Not Good
All this talk of the Epstein emails but the media is oddly silent on the news that I started to brush my hair from right to left instead of left to right this week and it looks SO much better.
OK, Fox News has been on it for the past four hours, but still.
OK, Fox News has been on it for the past four hours, but still.
November 13, 2025 at 4:15 AM
All this talk of the Epstein emails but the media is oddly silent on the news that I started to brush my hair from right to left instead of left to right this week and it looks SO much better.
OK, Fox News has been on it for the past four hours, but still.
OK, Fox News has been on it for the past four hours, but still.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
a lot of people regretting the 'this shoulda been an email' advice rn lol
November 13, 2025 at 3:57 AM
a lot of people regretting the 'this shoulda been an email' advice rn lol
Working through a bout of depression with compulsive exercise may seem like a healthier approach than, say, getting hammered every night, but I swear to Christ at this point I'm just collecting minor injuries like Pokémon. I'd be safer in the pub. Gonna talk to a hot bath about it.
November 12, 2025 at 1:52 PM
Working through a bout of depression with compulsive exercise may seem like a healthier approach than, say, getting hammered every night, but I swear to Christ at this point I'm just collecting minor injuries like Pokémon. I'd be safer in the pub. Gonna talk to a hot bath about it.
You could make me cry with a mildly poignant insurance ad right now, but this had me in floods of tears for 22 minutes. I need to rehydrate.
Tonight we remember our dear friend and bandleader Cleto 💙
Jimmy Kimmel Remembers His Best Friend and Bandleader Cleto Escobedo III
YouTube video by Jimmy Kimmel Live
www.youtube.com
November 12, 2025 at 7:35 AM
You could make me cry with a mildly poignant insurance ad right now, but this had me in floods of tears for 22 minutes. I need to rehydrate.
Need to find a new lawyer. This one keeps insisting that 'addicted to the shindig' isn't a valid defence for a failure to stop charge, and I simply disagree.
November 11, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Need to find a new lawyer. This one keeps insisting that 'addicted to the shindig' isn't a valid defence for a failure to stop charge, and I simply disagree.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Hamburger helps those that help themselves
November 9, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Hamburger helps those that help themselves
I'm really looking forward to the new season of Scrubs. I don't think it'll be funny. I just want to confirm that Sarah Chalke, Judy Reyes and Donald Faison haven't aged a day while Zach Braff turned into Tig Notaro
November 8, 2025 at 1:34 PM
I'm really looking forward to the new season of Scrubs. I don't think it'll be funny. I just want to confirm that Sarah Chalke, Judy Reyes and Donald Faison haven't aged a day while Zach Braff turned into Tig Notaro
Reposted by Keith Taylor
I was in a restaurant last night and the waiter asked if I’d like to see the specials. Sure, I said, I was always a fan but since Terry Hall died it just wouldn’t feel the same.
November 8, 2025 at 11:52 AM
I was in a restaurant last night and the waiter asked if I’d like to see the specials. Sure, I said, I was always a fan but since Terry Hall died it just wouldn’t feel the same.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
don't skip leg day theyre handing out free legs
November 7, 2025 at 12:25 AM
don't skip leg day theyre handing out free legs
A million wealthy New Yorkers just showed up in Ulaanbaatar, resolute. They say they're 'economic refugees' or something. Can you help? Not sure what to do with them. They're all crying. But like weird crying?
November 6, 2025 at 7:02 PM
A million wealthy New Yorkers just showed up in Ulaanbaatar, resolute. They say they're 'economic refugees' or something. Can you help? Not sure what to do with them. They're all crying. But like weird crying?
I climb aboard my ship, a world weary captain reluctantly forced from retirement for one final journey. As the tide takes us out to sea I turn to look back to shore, my heart yearning for my wife, Clara, and our consumptive child, Tom. But alas, I have no choice. I must go on this exposition.
November 6, 2025 at 4:52 AM
I climb aboard my ship, a world weary captain reluctantly forced from retirement for one final journey. As the tide takes us out to sea I turn to look back to shore, my heart yearning for my wife, Clara, and our consumptive child, Tom. But alas, I have no choice. I must go on this exposition.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
sorry I've added a "Controversy" section to your wikipedia article while you were asleep
November 5, 2025 at 11:55 AM
sorry I've added a "Controversy" section to your wikipedia article while you were asleep