Ersatz Cliff
@www.cliffordvickrey.com
360 followers 140 following 1.8K posts
Sad, bad, and inconsequential to know
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www.cliffordvickrey.com
It would rule to be a dour, late 19th century New England prohibitionist who—every day—got massively lit on opium-based cold remedies and original recipe Moxie. Talk about playing both sides and always coming out on top…
Reposted by Ersatz Cliff
lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com
the whole tron setting doesn't really make sense. why is the computer run by a fascist dictator? (sees my laptop updates weren't installed because some background software refused to quit) kill that program. kill it now. kill that program immediately
Reposted by Ersatz Cliff
www.cliffordvickrey.com
guess I’ll go with the next closest thing: “socialite”
www.cliffordvickrey.com
I need to enter an occupation for this credit card application. Sadly, there doesn’t seem to be an option for ghostwriting “I Hope They Screen ‘Cape Fear’ In Hell: The Tucker Max Guide to Cinema” in 2011 and living off the modest publishing royalties ever since…
www.cliffordvickrey.com
Received some bad news this morning. Leaders of all world faiths released a joint statement pronouncing that I, personally, am not an ensouled being. This is in light of leaked IHOP CCTV footage in which I gratingly refer to breakfast sandwiches as “breakie sammies” and pancakes as “flappy jays”
www.cliffordvickrey.com
“Nothing INXS”
Instructions to a wedding DJ
🤝
Inscription at the Delphic Temple of Apollo
www.cliffordvickrey.com
Can’t believe my favorite commedians dell'arte performed for the gran maestro of Florence. I’ll never again take seriously the Harlequin’s claim to hold a subversive mirror to the rich and powerful’s foibles…
Reposted by Ersatz Cliff
Reposted by Ersatz Cliff
billcorbett.bsky.social
[bitterly] No one’s ever given ME bubble enrichment
contemprainn.bsky.social
At the Saint Louis Zoo, one-year-old rockhopper penguin Bumi had a blast with bubble enrichment! Keepers set up a bubble machine for the indoor habitat at Penguin & Puffin Coast for a fun bubble party!! 🫧🥳🫧 #WildlifeWednesday
www.cliffordvickrey.com
Starting an off-brand knockoff of the Church of Scientology. Call me Temu Xenu…
www.cliffordvickrey.com
what’s up with the punctuation, and with every sentence starting with “and,” “but,” or “so?“ This is how undergrads write
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banalplay.bsky.social
You can always tell people who didn't work their way up through real jobs and manage based on the dumbest ideas they've heard of other terrible bosses doing.
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banalplay.bsky.social
Trump is team Maduro now
www.cliffordvickrey.com
the Celtics were horrible for most of my youth (first clear memory of them was Acie Earl’s revenge game). But Mike and Tommy taught me an important life lesson: if you’re clever, you can make a bad product fun and interesting. They thus gave me the confidence to go on dates
www.cliffordvickrey.com
My favorite time of the year on Twitter (RIP) was the late offseason when players/former players posted dumb, non-NBA-related stuff. That and bored fans born in 2009 sharing highlight reels with revisionist history like “Stromile Swift was a PROBLEM” (yes, for the team that drafted him 2nd overall)
Reposted by Ersatz Cliff
diplomatofnight.com
Netanyahu's mouthpiece, Amit Segal, casually admits on Twitter that his country has been holding 1,700 people from Gaza hostage, including children.
Among other things, according to the decision:

- 250 security prisoners will be released.  
- 1,700 residents of the Gaza Strip who were not involved in the events of October 7 and were arrested after the massacre will be released.  
- 22 minors under the age of 18, residents of the Gaza Strip who were not involved in the events of October 7 and were arrested after the massacre, will be released.  
- 360 bodies of terrorists will be returned.
www.cliffordvickrey.com
Working on material for my upcoming Netflix comedy special: “The Millennial Tax Dodger.” The municipal treasurer put my name on a lien certificate? Weird flex, but OK. Guess I’m living ad-valorem-assessment-free inside his head…
Reposted by Ersatz Cliff
nurbsy.bsky.social
Ladies and mythbusters,
www.cliffordvickrey.com
I’m tired of American fascism. If we *have* to revive bullshit from European history, could we at least have done the Inquisition? I would‘ve cashed in by opening a greasy homestyle restaurant, ”Auto bu-fé”
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razzball.bsky.social
You just got beat by a time traveler from the 1910s
Brewers Andrew Vaughn
www.cliffordvickrey.com
I doubt Ellison, Bezos, Musk, etc. can control public opinion by buying up legacy media outlets/social media platforms. For propagandists to persuade, they must be legible as something other than propagandists, & they must establish trust. American elites are too high on their own farts to do either