Scare Budd Dwyer
@airbudddwyer.bsky.social
1K followers 160 following 1.2K posts
professional dad. sometimes artist. there's several things in the rules about conspiracy, accepting bribes, racketeering, mail fraud, and perjury but there's nothing that says a dog can't be treasurer.
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airbudddwyer.bsky.social
my fondest Penn State related memory is the time my younger brother, exceptionally drunk, tried to microwave the hand of a guy at a party who was from Pennsylvania but did not attend Penn State while calling him a "Nittany Lion fuck"
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
mentally I was filing it as like "oh yeah. James Franklin. lost to Florida Atlantic in a 3-2 shootout in a game streamed on Crackle last week."
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
I only half pay attention to college football by way of highlight gifs and honest to god thought James Franklin was one of those like former D-III schools that somehow has a football program but not a dining hall and is getting dog walked by Hawaii at one AM eastern for a couple weeks here
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
I don't know who their DC is but I don't think they do, either
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
I haven't lived here in Baltimore when the Ravens were like outright bad before and it's a fascinating experience. John Harbaugh is going to have to flee town by night in a Mayflower truck by like week ten
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
feels like we're about to find out that everybody in Kansas is just uninsured or on a wild series of short term plans that aren't legally actually insurance per se called like OzCare
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
the coyote believes that if he simply purchases enough consumer goods and produces enough blueprints, he will succeed in his goals. what he does not account for is that the bird he so longs to eat represents the antichrist, constantly travelling through the tunnels he so painstakingly paints
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
yeah the next time there's a "he gets up at four AM to start grinding. at four fifteen he gets a blood transfusion while on a Zoom call. five AM? a nutrient paste. 'I'm too busy to chew normie food,' he laughs" piece I'm going to wonder where eight hundred episodes of a cartoon slots in there
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
just, uh, one more, uuhhn, thing, Mr Bastich
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
it's so cool that we have quantifiable evidence that being super rich makes you go crazy enough that you start theorizing that the antichrist is real and is either girls who made fun of you or the government in a cartoon about pirates, you used to have to wait for guys to die to find this stuff out
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
say it in a Biggie Smalls voice. I just did, alone in a room
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
we just showed our youngest a clip of Animal drumming and the laugh track is like Lucille Ball working a candy production line level howling at the concept of Puppet Drumming
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
guy who ran the laugh track for The Muppet Show had maybe the heaviest trigger finger in the game. long dead studio audience members absolutely losing their shit.
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
the only thing the meta algorithm has correctly intuited about me is that I love to see posts from restaurants banning dogs because too many owners were making weird demands
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
every big box retailer is sitting on so much him-branded product from several toy company guys going "he gets a lot of views on YouTube, therefore,
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
every picture of the Portland frog, if properly cropped, looks like it could be the stage select headshot of a Mega Man X level
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
day to day - pissed more than he thought he was going to when he started pissing
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
this is like when there's an article about how a young couple lives debt-free through hard work (and undisclosed financial backing)
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
Scam Cattebo is like Sleve McDichael level.
cjzero.bsky.social
Jay Harris accidentally spoonerized Cam Skattebo on Sportscenter
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
I don't know that you can thread the needle on gleefully firing thousands of federal workers for pure funzos quite recently and trying to do more firings, but this time as hard decisions made due to democrats being inflexible a couple months later
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
"I couldn't do that for that long" is probably what he's thinking
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
mailman just walked up to my storm door while I was in the middle of seeing how long I could hold the last note of Stars from Les Mis while holding my large son sideways and spinning around and I think he's judging me
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
Cam Skattebo heading home after the game, looking forward to giving his mom's new little nerd of a stepson, Charles, absolute hell all week
airbudddwyer.bsky.social
the monk throwing up a middle finger at his students is a fitting touch