gorlock
@gorlock.bsky.social
Ham hearted ❤️🌈
I want to share my sweetness with you
K̶e̶n̶t̶u̶c̶k̶y Ohio📍
discord: gorlockjr | insta: gorlock_jr |
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Pinned
gorlock
@gorlock.bsky.social
· Feb 27
60s girl group lyrics are like
Lead singer: my man's so bad they're running him out of town. My parents say if i don't break up with him they're kicking me out of the house
Backup singer: where'd ya meet him?
Lead singer: candy store
Lead singer: my man's so bad they're running him out of town. My parents say if i don't break up with him they're kicking me out of the house
Backup singer: where'd ya meet him?
Lead singer: candy store
Reposted by gorlock
If you're celebrating Friday the 13th you missed the point of the movie.
February 13, 2026 at 5:08 PM
If you're celebrating Friday the 13th you missed the point of the movie.
Reposted by gorlock
to be or [TW: suicidal ideation] not to be
February 12, 2026 at 3:36 PM
to be or [TW: suicidal ideation] not to be
when's the last time a celebrity butchered the national anthem on tv
February 12, 2026 at 4:25 PM
when's the last time a celebrity butchered the national anthem on tv
Reposted by gorlock
I was today years old when I learned that in most other countries it's considered impolite to sit on the toilet side saddle, whereas in the united states it's a sign of respect
February 12, 2026 at 2:58 AM
I was today years old when I learned that in most other countries it's considered impolite to sit on the toilet side saddle, whereas in the united states it's a sign of respect
these two have absolutely had it with your bullshit. the one on the right can't even stand to look at you, you're dead to her
February 11, 2026 at 4:23 AM
these two have absolutely had it with your bullshit. the one on the right can't even stand to look at you, you're dead to her
Reposted by gorlock
they found the seal that calls people gay
February 10, 2026 at 11:15 PM
they found the seal that calls people gay
Reposted by gorlock
Reposted by gorlock
Hard to get out of bed every morning when we constantly wake up to headlines like this.
February 10, 2026 at 1:57 AM
Hard to get out of bed every morning when we constantly wake up to headlines like this.
"we took a convenience sample" & "if this is extrapolable to the entire population of the US" is already dumb as shit on it's own, nevermind the fact they said 'extractable' (?), & that's before we even get to "155 ER patients at bellvue told us it feels so good to take hot shower when stoned"
second, a new-to-me humdinger, the claim that “nearly 2.8 million people suffer from cannabis hyperemesis syndrome”. this is bonkers on its face, a stat made up to scare the uninvolved. Click through the studies mentioned, you end up with a projection from a single study, spun up to a What If number
February 9, 2026 at 5:38 PM
"we took a convenience sample" & "if this is extrapolable to the entire population of the US" is already dumb as shit on it's own, nevermind the fact they said 'extractable' (?), & that's before we even get to "155 ER patients at bellvue told us it feels so good to take hot shower when stoned"
Reposted by gorlock
She's waiting for me to leave so she can lick it again🤭
February 9, 2026 at 4:37 PM
She's waiting for me to leave so she can lick it again🤭
Reposted by gorlock
Football-Themed Napkins At Super Bowl Party Too Nonabsorbent, Painful To Use On Mouth https://theonion.com/football-themed-napkins-at-super-bowl-party-too-nonabsorbent-painful-to-use-on-mouth/
February 9, 2026 at 12:35 AM
Football-Themed Napkins At Super Bowl Party Too Nonabsorbent, Painful To Use On Mouth https://theonion.com/football-themed-napkins-at-super-bowl-party-too-nonabsorbent-painful-to-use-on-mouth/
prehistoric surgery—would you have it? i would
February 8, 2026 at 2:10 AM
prehistoric surgery—would you have it? i would
eating is so boring sometimes, and such a delight at others. I like to do it standing up in both cases
February 7, 2026 at 9:32 PM
eating is so boring sometimes, and such a delight at others. I like to do it standing up in both cases
Reposted by gorlock
Han Solo breasted boobily down the magnificent ebony staircase. Chewbacca, resplendent in his Trandoshian skin leather tuxedo vest and thong, felt his manhood swell in anticipation. It was raining
February 7, 2026 at 7:28 PM
Han Solo breasted boobily down the magnificent ebony staircase. Chewbacca, resplendent in his Trandoshian skin leather tuxedo vest and thong, felt his manhood swell in anticipation. It was raining
fake stuff is just as good as real things. better, oftentimes
February 7, 2026 at 7:18 PM
fake stuff is just as good as real things. better, oftentimes
there's this drive thru by my house that obviously used to be some kind of normal grocery/corner store because there's a cartoon mascot of a smiling little boy with his grocery bags on the side of the building but I like to imagine he's a hardcore alcoholic
February 6, 2026 at 4:43 PM
there's this drive thru by my house that obviously used to be some kind of normal grocery/corner store because there's a cartoon mascot of a smiling little boy with his grocery bags on the side of the building but I like to imagine he's a hardcore alcoholic
Reposted by gorlock
I drink a tablespoon of dr bronners every night before bed like it says to on the bottle but it's getting so damn expensive does anyone know of an affordable alternative
November 24, 2024 at 4:48 AM
I drink a tablespoon of dr bronners every night before bed like it says to on the bottle but it's getting so damn expensive does anyone know of an affordable alternative
I could probably be doing really good for myself if you people didn't insist on gatekeeping your hacks
February 6, 2026 at 2:32 AM
I could probably be doing really good for myself if you people didn't insist on gatekeeping your hacks
calling everything you do "shrek coded"
February 5, 2026 at 8:35 PM
calling everything you do "shrek coded"
I love following along with his little touch-ups, I hope he gets really into filler now
JD Vance getting lip fillers is so fucking funny
February 5, 2026 at 7:13 PM
I love following along with his little touch-ups, I hope he gets really into filler now
Reposted by gorlock
getting shot in the head with a sniper and my body launches into a perfect backflip and lands upright leaning against the wall in a cunty position. The soldier who shot me has nightmares about it every day until killing his wife and then himself on March 28, 2043
February 5, 2026 at 5:44 PM
getting shot in the head with a sniper and my body launches into a perfect backflip and lands upright leaning against the wall in a cunty position. The soldier who shot me has nightmares about it every day until killing his wife and then himself on March 28, 2043
11:11 is the fucked up time
February 4, 2026 at 4:12 AM
11:11 is the fucked up time
Reposted by gorlock
when i receive the compliment that makes you forget the english language
February 2, 2026 at 9:27 PM
when i receive the compliment that makes you forget the english language