Collin Reischman
@collinreischman.bsky.social
Former political reporter | Current organized labor comms (UFCW) | My jokes are bad
Pinned
Billionaire heir to a South African emerald mine was going to support trans rights but then he saw one drag queen so now he thinks pronouns are violence
There’s a lot of folks that joke about how the original Top Gun movie is just teeming with homoerotic energy and they just go on and on about how much sexual tension there is with all the male actors and I’m sitting down and we-watching it now and WOW you were all actually underselling it
November 26, 2025 at 10:21 PM
There’s a lot of folks that joke about how the original Top Gun movie is just teeming with homoerotic energy and they just go on and on about how much sexual tension there is with all the male actors and I’m sitting down and we-watching it now and WOW you were all actually underselling it
Hey how does SpongeBob afford a two story house. He’s a fry cook. Housing market in Bikini Bottom must be insane
November 26, 2025 at 5:07 PM
Hey how does SpongeBob afford a two story house. He’s a fry cook. Housing market in Bikini Bottom must be insane
We should be pulling these things apart bolt-by-bolt and hurling these things into the sea
Additionally, OpenAI argues its not liable because Raine, by using ChatGPT for self-harm, broke its terms of service
November 26, 2025 at 8:45 AM
We should be pulling these things apart bolt-by-bolt and hurling these things into the sea
So everyone is just insane now huh
November 26, 2025 at 8:43 AM
So everyone is just insane now huh
It’s wild that the funniest thing I’ve ever read is also the reason I’ll have to kill myself
November 26, 2025 at 8:40 AM
It’s wild that the funniest thing I’ve ever read is also the reason I’ll have to kill myself
Media literacy died and satire died right along with it
November 25, 2025 at 7:17 PM
Media literacy died and satire died right along with it
What a perfect encapsulation of the brain of the Economic Conservative Thinker.
“Well yes you were right all along but you were awfully emotional about it. Anyway, I care now because the things I buy are more expensive”
“Well yes you were right all along but you were awfully emotional about it. Anyway, I care now because the things I buy are more expensive”
November 25, 2025 at 3:43 PM
What a perfect encapsulation of the brain of the Economic Conservative Thinker.
“Well yes you were right all along but you were awfully emotional about it. Anyway, I care now because the things I buy are more expensive”
“Well yes you were right all along but you were awfully emotional about it. Anyway, I care now because the things I buy are more expensive”
It must be incredible to live the kind of life where this is a thing you even have time to think about
At this point, the Washpost edit page is just trolling its readers.
This is today's actual house editorial.
This is today's actual house editorial.
November 25, 2025 at 3:31 PM
It must be incredible to live the kind of life where this is a thing you even have time to think about
Had to pick up coffee for a bunch of family and one of the coffees was just a plain large black coffee and when I ordered it the barista made it for me without any follow up questions so I think every stand up comedian in their 40s is a liar
November 25, 2025 at 3:06 PM
Had to pick up coffee for a bunch of family and one of the coffees was just a plain large black coffee and when I ordered it the barista made it for me without any follow up questions so I think every stand up comedian in their 40s is a liar
MTG went to Congress because she wanted to expose the cabal of pedophile elites running DC but then she found out the cabal of pedophile elites running DC were the people on her side so she just threw her hands up and quit. Incredible moment
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 PM
MTG went to Congress because she wanted to expose the cabal of pedophile elites running DC but then she found out the cabal of pedophile elites running DC were the people on her side so she just threw her hands up and quit. Incredible moment
Reposted by Collin Reischman
I just want one reporter to ask Donald about the Bubba thing. Please. It might heal the nation
November 18, 2025 at 6:11 PM
I just want one reporter to ask Donald about the Bubba thing. Please. It might heal the nation
If I had a nickel for every time Olivia Nuzzi had an affair with a presidential candidate several decades her senior while also covering that candidate as a “journalist” I’d have at least two nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s crazy it happened twice
November 18, 2025 at 3:37 PM
If I had a nickel for every time Olivia Nuzzi had an affair with a presidential candidate several decades her senior while also covering that candidate as a “journalist” I’d have at least two nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s crazy it happened twice
So Nuzzi did that really bad profile of Biden and it’s possibly because she found the first major American politician who loved his wife
November 18, 2025 at 3:33 PM
So Nuzzi did that really bad profile of Biden and it’s possibly because she found the first major American politician who loved his wife
Olivia Nuzzi’s book is further proof of my own theory that everyone is insane now
November 18, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Olivia Nuzzi’s book is further proof of my own theory that everyone is insane now
I keep imagining Stephen Hawking not knowing what was happening on the island and then one day he comes rolling around a corner and then has to express moral outrage and pure shock but he has to use his little robot vocalizer thing and I know I shouldn’t laugh but
November 14, 2025 at 7:12 AM
I keep imagining Stephen Hawking not knowing what was happening on the island and then one day he comes rolling around a corner and then has to express moral outrage and pure shock but he has to use his little robot vocalizer thing and I know I shouldn’t laugh but
We as a nation need to discuss the serious issue we have with nachos. Folks, the nachos need to be WIDER and not TALLER. if your nachos require me to use utensils you have made a mistake
November 13, 2025 at 11:25 PM
We as a nation need to discuss the serious issue we have with nachos. Folks, the nachos need to be WIDER and not TALLER. if your nachos require me to use utensils you have made a mistake
Reposted by Collin Reischman
Best case: The President of the United States knew about a pedophilia ring and did nothing to stop it.
Medium case: He also used his office to protect the perpetrators.
Worst case: Because he was one of the perpetrators.
Medium case: He also used his office to protect the perpetrators.
Worst case: Because he was one of the perpetrators.
November 13, 2025 at 2:39 AM
Best case: The President of the United States knew about a pedophilia ring and did nothing to stop it.
Medium case: He also used his office to protect the perpetrators.
Worst case: Because he was one of the perpetrators.
Medium case: He also used his office to protect the perpetrators.
Worst case: Because he was one of the perpetrators.
Rich people are so accustomed to being untouchable that they’ll write emails like “man all those sex crimes we did last weekend were so fun!” because they assume there won’t be consequences and it turns out they are right!
It’s just all so fucking bleak
It’s just all so fucking bleak
November 13, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Rich people are so accustomed to being untouchable that they’ll write emails like “man all those sex crimes we did last weekend were so fun!” because they assume there won’t be consequences and it turns out they are right!
It’s just all so fucking bleak
It’s just all so fucking bleak
Reposted by Collin Reischman
I was about to be angry at the kid in front of me screaming for no reason but then I remembered what flying with my toddler was like (she was so peaceful and never made a peep and everyone complimented her) and got even angrier
November 13, 2025 at 5:53 PM
I was about to be angry at the kid in front of me screaming for no reason but then I remembered what flying with my toddler was like (she was so peaceful and never made a peep and everyone complimented her) and got even angrier
I was mad at United for how they fucked up my travel plans but now I’m coming back from Hawaii on American and they don’t offer real food and they don’t have those screens in the seats so I’m sorry United. I didn’t realize you were actually doing more than the bare minimum
November 13, 2025 at 4:51 PM
I was mad at United for how they fucked up my travel plans but now I’m coming back from Hawaii on American and they don’t offer real food and they don’t have those screens in the seats so I’m sorry United. I didn’t realize you were actually doing more than the bare minimum
If the airport is open then the stores should be open too, regardless of how early or late
November 13, 2025 at 4:49 PM
If the airport is open then the stores should be open too, regardless of how early or late
I think we need to bring back DVD commentary but they are all done by Werner Herzog
November 12, 2025 at 8:37 PM
I think we need to bring back DVD commentary but they are all done by Werner Herzog