KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
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californiahorst.bsky.social
KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
@californiahorst.bsky.social
Champion in the epic war against squirrels

My Posts:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:bvpgyjfye2h6rnpijwggrnsl/feed/aaagze5vs2yjg

Pfp: The face of grey bug-eyed cat
Background banner: B&W image of a chubby, fluffy cat in repose with bug-eyes
Pinned
I’m clean as a whistle. A filthy disgusting whistle
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
this is not behavior becoming of a FIFA Peace Prize recipient.
December 15, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
If you see someone crying, ask them if it’s because of their haircut
December 15, 2025 at 12:50 PM
[watching a charlie brown christmas]
someone should really contact cps about pigpen
December 15, 2025 at 3:25 AM
chariot races be like old timey demolition derbies
December 15, 2025 at 2:36 AM
tonight I’m preparing a meal that my dad taught me to make and god dammit I miss him
December 15, 2025 at 1:29 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
FREE HIM SO HE CAN FIX IT
December 14, 2025 at 11:23 PM
when I have to enter my credit card number before finding out that shipping costs more than what I want to buy
December 15, 2025 at 1:09 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
when you’ve been waiting 18 minutes for the shredded cheese for your fajitas
December 15, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
the holidays were so much more affordable when Obama was president and christmas was illegal
November 21, 2025 at 5:31 PM
Have you visited my Etsy shop yet?
What is Mr. Green Jeans asking him?
December 14, 2025 at 9:17 PM
everyone bought all their solstice gifts yet?
December 14, 2025 at 8:57 PM
figgy pudding sounds weird
December 14, 2025 at 8:46 PM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
He died from an unprofitable disease.
December 14, 2025 at 11:29 AM
if i was a cat i’d lick ALL the chicken
December 13, 2025 at 6:25 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
Great news! Your order is nearly to the toilet!
December 13, 2025 at 5:08 AM
i cant believe they allow me to post high
December 13, 2025 at 5:09 AM
i am typing this skeet slowly because i know you aren’t a fast reader
December 13, 2025 at 5:00 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
There’s gotta be a lumberjack out there who’s like “Fuck flannel gimme a pirate’s blouse.”
December 13, 2025 at 3:34 AM
Velveeta may be a real cheese food product but Vevleeta is a “real” cheez füd product. Vevleeta, one step further from reality than Velveeta
December 13, 2025 at 3:39 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
I’m pretty certain that when death arrives at my door he’ll look at me and say “holy fuck! what happened to you?”
December 12, 2025 at 8:19 PM
I’m pretty certain that when death arrives at my door he’ll look at me and say “holy fuck! what happened to you?”
December 12, 2025 at 8:19 PM
am I the only one whose notifications are just showing negative numbers?
December 12, 2025 at 7:51 PM
the intro to this song never fails to calm me the fuck down

youtu.be/8XgRSVBbHvs
End of the Day
YouTube video by Al Stewart - Topic
youtu.be
December 12, 2025 at 3:30 AM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
The Flash may be really fast but it still takes him about as much time to wash a load of laundry as everyone else
December 11, 2025 at 2:39 PM
Reposted by KRAMPUS’S LITTLE HELPER
why is my AI dead grandma taking such a hardline stance on Taiwan
December 11, 2025 at 3:53 PM