Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

clam boat to the underworld

@clambot.bsky.social

450 followers 940 following 4.4K posts

Cléo! from 5 to 7 not a bot, just a robotic clam

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Pinned

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · May 13

better to remain quiet and be thought a fool than open your mouth and let the 36 grapes you stuffed in there come avalanching out all over the interviewers desk

1 9 89

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 2h

are you there god? it's me margaret qualley

Reposted by clam boat to the underworld

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · May 27

people think "batcopter" combines the words "bat" and "copter" but actually it's "pter" which is greek for "wing" and "batco" which is Bruce Wayne's merchandising subsidiary

4 19 170

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 3h

i do like an aged, sharp cheddar, but they're too crumbly for a car cheese

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 3h

they say it's better to have washed and not folded than never to have washed at all

1 2 11

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 17h

wait there's costco paneer? i ask as a BJs customer

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

yeah totally, they're like "what if we just left you to the murderous criminals" and then they do a work slowdown and crime goes down and they're like "shit i gotta make payments on my F150 Raptor" and then it's back to work

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

Thiel: Look the character of Marcel, the shell ostensibly wearing shoes, represents a certain stochastic submission, that is to say that Marcel is a shell yearning to protect a soul, a shell-bearing creature, deserving of shoes, but from an unholy dispensational standpoint, I mean this from a Cathol

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

oh god you muted me didn't you, aw shit

1 1

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

sorry, i had a drink before my adhd medication wore off and now here i am, over-replying

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

which I assume you and yours have rehearsed many times in advance for just such an encounter

1 1

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

it also would have been acceptable to bust out just a few select Jerome Robbins dance moves

1 1

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

i mean, yes, that's what being witty is about, until you find someone with a quick comeback and that person becomes your lifelong friend

2 1

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

later in the shower you'll realize you should have answered "from our first cigarette to our last dying day"

1 1

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

oh shit

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 18h

wait what if motion smoothing is like the They Live glasses

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 19h

i loved his show when i was 12 and ten years later the theater I was managing hosted his live show and I got to meet him!

1 26

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 19h

can we get Chotiner to call the insurance company

1 22

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 19h

god i just finished reading that an hour ago and thought the very same thing

2 18

Reposted by clam boat to the underworld

Moira Donegan @moiradonegan.bsky.social · 21h

Probably the actual advice that most young men need is that no one finds self pity appealing.

33 160 1.1K

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 21h

the best

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 21h

ok i believe you but don't stop posting about it

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 21h

why is this making me wish i were there

1 1

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 21h

ok i did a load of whites and they came out pretty white which is a win and typing this out makes me realize i'm kinda lonely

1 3

clam boat to the underworld @clambot.bsky.social · 22h

i guess i'd go with tronlodytes

Reposted by clam boat to the underworld

Amy @lolennui.bsky.social · 1d

This Halloween I’m going as the scariest thing of all, emotional intimacy!!! ha ha just kidding I’m prion disease

18 210 1.5K