Brian Caron
@acornbrain.bsky.social
Un-fluencer. Mostly harmless
Just me: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lcmic7aufmdzn4fdxtclgowv/feed/aaaknv3nrggu4
Sometimes I paint:
www.briancaron.com
Just me: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lcmic7aufmdzn4fdxtclgowv/feed/aaaknv3nrggu4
Sometimes I paint:
www.briancaron.com
Pinned
Brian Caron
@acornbrain.bsky.social
· Nov 18
It's a shame I abandoned years worth of hilarious jokes over on Twitter. Don't go and check, just trust me on this. Hilarious.
Gut Tetris. I'm here for it
You can fit more pie in if you orient the taper of the wedge properly
November 27, 2025 at 2:49 PM
Gut Tetris. I'm here for it
Reposted by Brian Caron
"We all float up here."
November 22, 2024 at 2:28 PM
"We all float up here."
Flying to Papua New Guinea to get a head start on Black Friday deals.
November 27, 2025 at 2:04 PM
Flying to Papua New Guinea to get a head start on Black Friday deals.
Feels like an elastic waistband kind of a day.
November 27, 2025 at 1:18 PM
Feels like an elastic waistband kind of a day.
Thanksgiving is a true test of one's Corningware capacity.
November 27, 2025 at 1:09 PM
Thanksgiving is a true test of one's Corningware capacity.
Reposted by Brian Caron
Carpenters are only in it for them shelves.
November 26, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Carpenters are only in it for them shelves.
A movie that takes place where you are from (close enough)
November 23, 2025 at 8:24 PM
A movie that takes place where you are from (close enough)
Big pet peeve is commercials when people buy each other brand new cars for Christmas with a giant bow and everything.
November 23, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Big pet peeve is commercials when people buy each other brand new cars for Christmas with a giant bow and everything.
Take THAT, Dracula!!
November 23, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Take THAT, Dracula!!
Reposted by Brian Caron
The only thing more painful than typing into a tv is watching someone else type into a tv
November 21, 2025 at 2:37 AM
The only thing more painful than typing into a tv is watching someone else type into a tv
Reposted by Brian Caron
Tried to bend over. my soul stayed upright and walked out without me.
November 22, 2025 at 10:40 PM
Tried to bend over. my soul stayed upright and walked out without me.
Eating oatmeal raisin cookies LIKE A GROWN-UP!
November 22, 2025 at 5:37 PM
Eating oatmeal raisin cookies LIKE A GROWN-UP!
Unplugging my phone at 97% because you always leave 'em wanting more.
November 22, 2025 at 1:58 PM
Unplugging my phone at 97% because you always leave 'em wanting more.
Father, Son and Holy Mackerel
November 22, 2025 at 1:52 PM
Father, Son and Holy Mackerel
I don't understand the cruel science of it, but looking good in the mirror does not transfer to the selfie.
November 22, 2025 at 1:23 PM
I don't understand the cruel science of it, but looking good in the mirror does not transfer to the selfie.
Learned about a new way to slice an avocado on Instagram and I'm excited to try it out this week. So yeah, still punk.
November 22, 2025 at 12:23 PM
Learned about a new way to slice an avocado on Instagram and I'm excited to try it out this week. So yeah, still punk.
All I've ever wanted to be was just the right size for my britches
November 22, 2025 at 3:58 AM
All I've ever wanted to be was just the right size for my britches
Reposted by Brian Caron
Doctor: you’re going to feel some pressure, ready?
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
November 21, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Doctor: you’re going to feel some pressure, ready?
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
Me: yes
Doctor: your parents are prouder of your sister than you
Fifty two years old and I still can't figure out where to part my hair
November 21, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Fifty two years old and I still can't figure out where to part my hair
Reposted by Brian Caron
That wasn't very Forklift Certified of you
November 20, 2025 at 11:18 AM
That wasn't very Forklift Certified of you
Do drug companies worry they will run out of random syllables to moosh together to name their products?
November 20, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Do drug companies worry they will run out of random syllables to moosh together to name their products?
I know I harp on the tacky gold knickknacks alot, but in all seriousness it should be obvious that you should trust roughly 0% of the decisions that come from someone with taste THAT BAD.
November 16, 2025 at 5:53 PM
I know I harp on the tacky gold knickknacks alot, but in all seriousness it should be obvious that you should trust roughly 0% of the decisions that come from someone with taste THAT BAD.
Reposted by Brian Caron
Fire Marshal: "There are too many kung fu fighters in here"
November 16, 2025 at 2:17 AM
Fire Marshal: "There are too many kung fu fighters in here"
Clocking in at the shitpost factory.
November 16, 2025 at 12:31 PM
Clocking in at the shitpost factory.