Burke Means To Smother
@timwburke.bsky.social
Burke (v): To smother to sell the corpse.
"Fazgood & the Obstreperous Moosecrab Caper" LGBTQ friendly fantasy humor novel
"Saints of Flesh" & "The Flesh Sutra" Goth Body Horror
Amazon/KU
Newsletter: https://subscribepage.io/AQbMm0
www.Timwburke.com
"Fazgood & the Obstreperous Moosecrab Caper" LGBTQ friendly fantasy humor novel
"Saints of Flesh" & "The Flesh Sutra" Goth Body Horror
Amazon/KU
Newsletter: https://subscribepage.io/AQbMm0
www.Timwburke.com
Pinned
Fazgood and the Obstreperous Moosecrab Caper: The Mad Earl Chronicles
A free-standing novel without a cliffhanger.Follow the escapades of The Mad Earl Fazgood in this rollicking tale based on the should-be-true adventures of a delightfully bizarre nobleman run rampant.A...
booksprout.co
I poured *FORTY-FIVE YEARS* into this book. Jokes. Imagination. Odd characters. Outlandish Plots. Then pro spec-fic writers helped turn it into magic.
This is my life's work.
Click and read it for FREE.
#fantasynovels #fantasy #booksky #scifi&fantasy #codexwriters
booksprout.co/reviewer/rev...
This is my life's work.
Click and read it for FREE.
#fantasynovels #fantasy #booksky #scifi&fantasy #codexwriters
booksprout.co/reviewer/rev...
BookTok keeps saying "they do horrible things but there aren't any love scenes."
This is *not* a Dark Fantasy Romance.
This is where the Horror *is* Romance.
"I love 'The Flesh Sutra!'" - Nancy Holder
This is *not* a Dark Fantasy Romance.
This is where the Horror *is* Romance.
"I love 'The Flesh Sutra!'" - Nancy Holder
This is The Horror of Romance.
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
December 10, 2025 at 11:02 PM
BookTok keeps saying "they do horrible things but there aren't any love scenes."
This is *not* a Dark Fantasy Romance.
This is where the Horror *is* Romance.
"I love 'The Flesh Sutra!'" - Nancy Holder
This is *not* a Dark Fantasy Romance.
This is where the Horror *is* Romance.
"I love 'The Flesh Sutra!'" - Nancy Holder
This is The Horror of Romance.
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
The Flesh Sutra
The Flesh Sutra - Kindle edition by Burke, Tim. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Use features like bookmarks, note taking and highlighting while reading The Flesh Sutra.
www.amazon.com
December 10, 2025 at 9:14 PM
BookTok keeps saying "they do horrible things but there aren't any love scenes."
This is *not* a Dark Fantasy Romance.
This is where the Horror *is* Romance.
"I love 'The Flesh Sutra!'" - Nancy Holder
This is *not* a Dark Fantasy Romance.
This is where the Horror *is* Romance.
"I love 'The Flesh Sutra!'" - Nancy Holder
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
This is The Horror of Romance.
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
The Flesh Sutra
The Flesh Sutra - Kindle edition by Burke, Tim. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Use features like bookmarks, note taking and highlighting while reading The Flesh Sutra.
www.amazon.com
December 10, 2025 at 9:10 PM
This is The Horror of Romance.
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
This is The Horror of Romance.
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
The Flesh Sutra
The Flesh Sutra - Kindle edition by Burke, Tim. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Use features like bookmarks, note taking and highlighting while reading The Flesh Sutra.
www.amazon.com
December 10, 2025 at 9:10 PM
This is The Horror of Romance.
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Two nascent demigods, alone. He and she have nothing in common other than their powers. They will mutilate everyone, friends and strangers, and call it "love."
Longlisted as "Best Novel" for the HWA's 2014 Stoker Awards
www.amazon.com/Flesh-Sutra-...
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
Happy Wednesday! My latest story "Review: When the Baby Sleeps" is now live on @nightmare-magazine.com! If you're looking a brief creepy read, I hope you enjoy this one. 📽️🍼🛏️
HUGE thanks to @wnwagner.bsky.social for taking on this micro horror.
www.nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/revi...
HUGE thanks to @wnwagner.bsky.social for taking on this micro horror.
www.nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/revi...
Review: When the Baby Sleeps - Nightmare Magazine
The initial spark for this story was a writing prompt I saw online about writing a review for a horror movie that doesn’t exist. It led me to think about my personal relationship with horror movies. S...
www.nightmare-magazine.com
December 10, 2025 at 4:36 PM
Happy Wednesday! My latest story "Review: When the Baby Sleeps" is now live on @nightmare-magazine.com! If you're looking a brief creepy read, I hope you enjoy this one. 📽️🍼🛏️
HUGE thanks to @wnwagner.bsky.social for taking on this micro horror.
www.nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/revi...
HUGE thanks to @wnwagner.bsky.social for taking on this micro horror.
www.nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/revi...
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
scanning the @sundance.org lineup: hmm, interesting, might be good, sure why not, :loses entire fucking mind:
December 10, 2025 at 5:04 PM
scanning the @sundance.org lineup: hmm, interesting, might be good, sure why not, :loses entire fucking mind:
This isn't a real movie, but IF ONLY!
KEN RUSSELL’S DRACULA (1980).
An ancient and elegant vampire with a taste for the blood of genius travels to London.
Starring Peter O’Toole, with Peter Ustinov as Dr. Van Helsing, Oliver Reed as Renfield, Michael York as Harker, Sarah Miles as Mina, and Mia Farrow as Lucy.
An ancient and elegant vampire with a taste for the blood of genius travels to London.
Starring Peter O’Toole, with Peter Ustinov as Dr. Van Helsing, Oliver Reed as Renfield, Michael York as Harker, Sarah Miles as Mina, and Mia Farrow as Lucy.
December 10, 2025 at 5:07 PM
This isn't a real movie, but IF ONLY!
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
You know what?
You can't control what anyone else thinks about you. That's on them not you.
You be you and don't stress out about what they think of you.
*Me talking to myself*
You can't control what anyone else thinks about you. That's on them not you.
You be you and don't stress out about what they think of you.
*Me talking to myself*
December 10, 2025 at 3:56 PM
You know what?
You can't control what anyone else thinks about you. That's on them not you.
You be you and don't stress out about what they think of you.
*Me talking to myself*
You can't control what anyone else thinks about you. That's on them not you.
You be you and don't stress out about what they think of you.
*Me talking to myself*
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
Hey, I'm launching a Patreon! You may have heard that it's just a little bit hard to make a living as a writer these days, so if you like my culture writing, please consider subscribing 🖤
My first essay, live now and free to all, is on Elem Klimov's Come and See www.patreon.com/posts/143805...
My first essay, live now and free to all, is on Elem Klimov's Come and See www.patreon.com/posts/143805...
Beauty is a Wound: Come and See (1985) | Read Jump Scares
Get more from Read Jump Scares on Patreon
www.patreon.com
December 9, 2025 at 9:32 PM
Hey, I'm launching a Patreon! You may have heard that it's just a little bit hard to make a living as a writer these days, so if you like my culture writing, please consider subscribing 🖤
My first essay, live now and free to all, is on Elem Klimov's Come and See www.patreon.com/posts/143805...
My first essay, live now and free to all, is on Elem Klimov's Come and See www.patreon.com/posts/143805...
Just like or comment or DM me and I'll be glad to send you the funniest book you'll read this year. Yes, I am serious.
Get a free PDF or Epub of “Fazgood and the Obstreperous Moosecrab Caper!” Called “Terry Gilliam Meets Terry Pratchett”; a quirky and clever second-world stand-alone of 110K words. Reviewers say awesome and delightful.
#fantasyauthors #fantasynovels #scifi&fantasy
timwb.substack.com/p/fazgood-in...
#fantasyauthors #fantasynovels #scifi&fantasy
timwb.substack.com/p/fazgood-in...
"Fazgood" In Your Home! Quirky Hilarity FOR FREE!
Free Epubs and PDFs Available!
timwb.substack.com
December 9, 2025 at 8:35 PM
Just like or comment or DM me and I'll be glad to send you the funniest book you'll read this year. Yes, I am serious.
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
5 ways to give your fave authors free-to-you gifts over the holidays! 💙📚
1. post about their book on socials
2. rec on other posts & Reddit threads
3. suggest their book to a book club!
4. order their book from a library/ask can it be ordered in!
5. add it to GoodReads lists for discoverability!
1. post about their book on socials
2. rec on other posts & Reddit threads
3. suggest their book to a book club!
4. order their book from a library/ask can it be ordered in!
5. add it to GoodReads lists for discoverability!
December 4, 2025 at 10:26 PM
5 ways to give your fave authors free-to-you gifts over the holidays! 💙📚
1. post about their book on socials
2. rec on other posts & Reddit threads
3. suggest their book to a book club!
4. order their book from a library/ask can it be ordered in!
5. add it to GoodReads lists for discoverability!
1. post about their book on socials
2. rec on other posts & Reddit threads
3. suggest their book to a book club!
4. order their book from a library/ask can it be ordered in!
5. add it to GoodReads lists for discoverability!
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
This is the best music video ever created. I will not be taking questions at this time.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=y25s...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=y25s...
Annie Lennox - Walking on Broken Glass (Official Video)
YouTube video by AnnieLennoxVEVO
www.youtube.com
December 8, 2025 at 4:31 PM
This is the best music video ever created. I will not be taking questions at this time.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=y25s...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=y25s...
I sold nine books in three days last week. Onward and upward!
December 8, 2025 at 4:43 PM
I sold nine books in three days last week. Onward and upward!
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
I'm reeling from the news that GIRL IN THE CREEK made both The Lineup's Best Horror Books of 2025 and Library Journal's Best Books 2025 lists!!!
the-line-up.com/best-horror-...
www.libraryjournal.com/story/Stella...
the-line-up.com/best-horror-...
www.libraryjournal.com/story/Stella...
December 8, 2025 at 4:22 PM
I'm reeling from the news that GIRL IN THE CREEK made both The Lineup's Best Horror Books of 2025 and Library Journal's Best Books 2025 lists!!!
the-line-up.com/best-horror-...
www.libraryjournal.com/story/Stella...
the-line-up.com/best-horror-...
www.libraryjournal.com/story/Stella...
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
You should write weird, human stuff as a fuck-you to AI and the awful world we live in, yes, but also because you will be changed and your life will be changed through allowing yourself to be vulnerable and uncomfortable in your art.
December 7, 2025 at 9:48 PM
You should write weird, human stuff as a fuck-you to AI and the awful world we live in, yes, but also because you will be changed and your life will be changed through allowing yourself to be vulnerable and uncomfortable in your art.
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
Happy 76th Birthday, Tom Waits!
December 7, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Happy 76th Birthday, Tom Waits!
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
[on the set of Scarface]
AL PACINO: say hello to my little friend [opens jacket to reveal a tiny kitten]
DIRECTOR: son of a bitch CUT
AL PACINO: say hello to my little friend [opens jacket to reveal a tiny kitten]
DIRECTOR: son of a bitch CUT
December 7, 2025 at 8:51 AM
[on the set of Scarface]
AL PACINO: say hello to my little friend [opens jacket to reveal a tiny kitten]
DIRECTOR: son of a bitch CUT
AL PACINO: say hello to my little friend [opens jacket to reveal a tiny kitten]
DIRECTOR: son of a bitch CUT
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
I have a sexy body that I’m willing to put on display but everyone keeps harassing me by saying “what are you doing with that corpse” and “I’m calling the police”
December 7, 2025 at 8:46 AM
I have a sexy body that I’m willing to put on display but everyone keeps harassing me by saying “what are you doing with that corpse” and “I’m calling the police”
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
Doctor: you have 6-7 days to live
Me: lol
Me: lol
December 7, 2025 at 1:26 AM
Doctor: you have 6-7 days to live
Me: lol
Me: lol
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
My reasons to stay alive:
1. Stubborn belief that things will someday be less bad (because they have to get better eventually)
2. Spite (I will not beat certain people to the grave)
3. Mr. Sillymoose & Aster
4. My family would be devastated
5. I might miss out on meeting amazing friends/mentors
1. Stubborn belief that things will someday be less bad (because they have to get better eventually)
2. Spite (I will not beat certain people to the grave)
3. Mr. Sillymoose & Aster
4. My family would be devastated
5. I might miss out on meeting amazing friends/mentors
March 12, 2025 at 11:41 PM
My reasons to stay alive:
1. Stubborn belief that things will someday be less bad (because they have to get better eventually)
2. Spite (I will not beat certain people to the grave)
3. Mr. Sillymoose & Aster
4. My family would be devastated
5. I might miss out on meeting amazing friends/mentors
1. Stubborn belief that things will someday be less bad (because they have to get better eventually)
2. Spite (I will not beat certain people to the grave)
3. Mr. Sillymoose & Aster
4. My family would be devastated
5. I might miss out on meeting amazing friends/mentors
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
no one has ever gotten the spirit of our country as right as paul verhoeven making robocop
"Soon, CNN will run live odds on world events where its viewers can gamble on them in real time on their smartphones."
CNN Partners With a Gambling App That Lets You Wager on Starvation in Gaza
The app company’s two biggest investors are also heavily invested in the Israeli military.
truthout.org
December 5, 2025 at 11:12 PM
no one has ever gotten the spirit of our country as right as paul verhoeven making robocop
Meanwhile, the inventor went on to create a device providing portable solar power plus distilled water, as well as the Freestyle soda machine. WHY ISN'T THIS GUY THE RICHEST ON THE PLANET?
Younger people who didn't witness it cannot fathom the hype around the Segway. Every news station agreed it would revolutionize the entire social fabric of the Earth. That all future humans would divide history between the savage days of the past, and the soon to be new era of zoom zoom scoot scoot.
December 3, 2025 at 10:46 PM
Meanwhile, the inventor went on to create a device providing portable solar power plus distilled water, as well as the Freestyle soda machine. WHY ISN'T THIS GUY THE RICHEST ON THE PLANET?
I loooooove cursed media!
Hello blue of sky, I have a new story called The Short History of a Long-Forgotten, Ill-Fated Telenovela (pretty self-explanatory, really) on @nightmare-magazine.com.
www.nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/the-...
www.nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/the-...
The Short History of a Long-Forgotten, Ill-Fated Telenovela - Nightmare Magazine
The last copy of Senhora (1972–1973) lies, with no identification tag, on the shelves of Cinemateca Brasileira, the largest audiovisual archive in Latin America. If anyone ever opened the tin cans, th...
www.nightmare-magazine.com
December 3, 2025 at 10:09 PM
I loooooove cursed media!
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
Reposted by Burke Means To Smother
how many crows could Counting Crows count if Counting Crows could count crows?
December 1, 2025 at 6:32 PM
how many crows could Counting Crows count if Counting Crows could count crows?