Christian Alsis
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christianalsis.bsky.social
Christian Alsis
@christianalsis.bsky.social
Easily swindled
Who up brining they turkey?
November 25, 2025 at 12:18 PM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
I saw some horrible copy on a Chili's menu tonight:

HUNGRY? Get ready not to be
November 25, 2025 at 4:59 AM
Plenty of Shaq-A-Licious gummies at the cvs in willow grove. No refunds. Final sale.
November 24, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
The youtube algorithm serves me exact level of exciting content I deserve.
November 23, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
The Hamburgler has plenty of money. That's why it's so outrageous what he does
November 22, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
I hope this means what I think it means (they are rebooting the Ron Pearlman Beauty and the Beast show from the 90s)
November 22, 2025 at 2:34 AM
Sounding good, sir!
DJT: They had restrictions on water. It comes down from heaven, right? You want to wash hands, or like me, you wash your hair. I lather up ..here's no water. I won't mention 3rd item in bathroom bc I always get criticized. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you shouldn't be owning McDonalds
November 18, 2025 at 2:06 AM
Windiest night of the year. Let’s pass on every down.
November 17, 2025 at 2:13 AM
I’ve been waiting all day for Sunday night.
November 17, 2025 at 1:17 AM
I’m always unsettled when someone is in the negative after Double Jeopardy and they are just gone after the commercial break. Are they okay? Are they getting roughed up offscreen? Or are they simply arrested?
November 14, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Every adult board game now is called like Asshole Poker or Death by Sarcasm or Don’t Be a Dick: The Extreme Party Game.
November 14, 2025 at 6:50 PM
Better dead than Fireman Ed
November 14, 2025 at 1:15 AM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
November 12, 2025 at 9:02 AM
M: “But Bond you were poisoned.”
Bond: “No, I wasn’t.”
M: “And exploded!”
Bond: “Not me, no. I’m alive and I’m James Bond”

Problem solved.
November 12, 2025 at 5:45 AM
Eagles win
November 11, 2025 at 4:27 AM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
Walter Matthau
November 11, 2025 at 12:29 AM
I have two children until 10 so excuse me for being behind the times but….i have been Burrata-pilled.
November 10, 2025 at 10:39 PM
November 9, 2025 at 10:53 PM
You know that oil that is there when you open a new jar of natural peanut butter? I dab that behind my ears like cologne.
November 9, 2025 at 10:38 PM
Davis Mills heard all your neck jokes. Now he’s coming for yours…
November 9, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Very likely the most valuable book I own.
November 9, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
November 8, 2025 at 10:29 PM
Reposted by Christian Alsis
I dropped 75lbs on jenny craig and she died
November 7, 2025 at 10:49 PM
November 8, 2025 at 8:45 PM